【EN】My “Spiri-Do” 2
By Senon Wakamiya
【EN】
Master: “So, we came to the sea today… The ocean’s blue and the sky’s blue melt together. It feels wonderful.”
Disciple: “Yes, Master!”
Master: “Do you have your power stone with you?”
Disciple: “Yes! Yesterday a set of prayer beads was half price, so I bought it!”
Master: “Excellent. You’re still a lightworker, yes?”
Disciple: “Yes! I’ve worked at an electronics store for four years!”
Master: “Then here… we shall call our cosmic companions.”
Disciple: “Master! That means… calling a UFO!? In broad daylight…?”
Master: “Day or night is irrelevant. If I call them, they will come. Without fail.”
Disciple: “Master, you’re amazing! Ah… paying 20 million yen in membership fees was totally worth it!”
Alien A: “Yo… this is bad. Some weird people are calling us.”
Alien B: “Ignore it. If you respond, it never ends.”
Alien A: “No, no—listen! That lady in a kimono is staring straight at us, clutching a rock and waving her hand!”
Alien B: “Why do they think we’d descend because of a rock?”
Alien A: “Exactly! Our planet has rocks everywhere. Why would we get excited about rocks now? Our science is thousands of years ahead.”
Alien B: “Annoying. Look at that face… I wanna shoot.”
Alien A: “Don’t shoot. God will get mad and show up. Too much trouble.”
Disciple: “Master! They’re not coming down!”
Master: “It’s fine. Keep smiling. Call to them: ‘We are your comrades.’”
Alien A: “Ugh… she’s smiling with insane confidence. It’s creepy.”
Alien B: “If someone smiles at you that confidently, even a cat runs away.”
Alien A: “What do we do? I feel kind of sorry for them—should we flash once? Just once?”
Alien B: “You’re too soft. Fine. One flash. Only once. Otherwise it never ends.”
Disciple: “Master!! Master!! Something flashed!! It disappeared right away, but—”
Master: “They are close.”
Disciple: “Just a little more! What are we missing!?”
Master: “I heard that among aliens, Tomio Umezawa’s ‘Yume Shibai’ is all the rage. You—sing it here.”
Disciple: “Me!?”
Master: “Yes. You.”
Alien A: “Whoa—WHAT!? Look! That old guy started singing ‘Yume Shibai’! And he’s unbelievably bad!”
Alien B: “That’s intense. At this rate someone’s calling the cops.”
Alien A: “That song was trending for us ages ago! They’re totally off.”
Alien B: “What’s trending now is Lenny Kravitz’s ‘Rock and Roll Is Dead.’”
Alien A: “Man… I’m starting to pity him. Should we go down?”
Alien B: “Go down where? This whole area is no-parking roads.”
Alien A: “That coin parking lot over there.”
Alien B: “Nope. Last time we parked in coin parking and left the ship till morning—900 yen for one night.”
Alien A: “And I paid all of it! Pay me back half.”
Alien B: “Sure, I’ll give you 450, but first—you owe me 300. Pay up.”
Alien A: “Then we’ll settle it: give me 150 right now.”
Alien B: “Tch… I only have a big bill. You got change?”
Alien A: “Change for that? No way. Then stop at the convenience store and break it.”
Alien B: “To break it I’ll have to buy something I don’t need. I hate that. Can’t you just treat me to 150 yen?”
Alien A: “What, you wanna fight?”
Alien B: “Huh?”
Alien A: “Huh?”
Alien B: “You’re making a whole scene over 150 yen. You want it?”
Alien A: “…Whatever. We have to head back soon. We’ll settle this later, I swear.”
Alien B: “Later my ass. Right now.”
Alien A: “Huh?”
Alien B: “Don’t bring your face that close. Huh?”
Disciple: “Master… the aliens didn’t come down.”
Master: “Perhaps… perhaps they have profound circumstances of their own. Let us go home for today. When conditions align, they will surely descend.”
Disciple: “Yes, Master!”
Alien A: “Hey! Why are you grabbing my collar? I can’t drive like this!”
Alien B: “And you—stop pulling my hair! I’m gonna wreck you!”
(End)
SENON ARCHIVE -まとめのまとめ-
Contents (EN)
① Gogyouka (Five-Line Poems)
② Transformation Begins in the Body (walking / meals / notebook)
③ Sergei (dialogue series)
④ Dialogues & Inner Comedy
⑤ Declaration / Meta
Index (EN):
GOGYŌKA-EN
他言語版 / Other languages
【JP】Japanese:
【PT-BR】Português (Brasil)：
【ES】Español：
【FR】Français：
【ZH-简】简体中文：
【ZH-繁TW】繁體中文（台灣）：
