Hey there!
So, my blog is dumb. How are you even reading this???  This is a place I go and gripe about life being weird. And you read it. Why?  Maybe you relate? Maybe you're curious to see how this all pans out? Maybe you want to see me quit complaining, pull up my boot straps and get it together. Maybe you want to see me do all the things I ramble about in my "want to do's" or quit blabbing about it and decide to be really content with where I'm at in life.

I have had a lot of really beautiful, motivating, spiritual experiences lately. I even attended a women's conference kind of thing over a weekend and when I got back home I knew instantly that I could not live in this space one more minute without making some major changes. People around me are doing all kinds of hard, life changing things and I act like I'm stuck, or I'm fragile, or like we'll crumble if anything is different. Next time you see me grab my shoulders, shake me, and if you deem necessary you have my permission to slap me. Seriously. I'll know why.

I often do get revved up to start changing and even know decided things like: exactly where to start, what changes to make, and what people to consult, etc. And then life is so blasted busy another week will pass and I'm back to another equally as busy weekend having done nothing different. So THIS WEEK people. Tomorrow. I'm going to go ahead and do some big deal things. Because I'm a big deal. And this boy of mine is a big deal. And this life we live/lives we are living is/are a big deal. And I don't want to waste another second.

Okay, another side note....I think I'm going to start another blog. Right after talking about wasted time, I'm sharing this with you. Ironic much?  No but seriously. You know how you are getting to post all these lovely pictures and posts about your children and your lives and I am basically just journaling because my child is soooooo private and uncomfortable with me sharing?  Well, since my point of sharing is to keep some sort of record of our lives in a way (not really scrapbooking cause I am lame at that), and to really talk through life so that we can understand snippits of our journey, doesn't it make sense to find a way to talk about what is REALLY going on in our world over here????  So I'm thinking about an anonymous blog. A blog that describes me and the teenager, but never divulges identity. No photos of us, and no inclination to our whereabouts, but all the gory juicy details breaking down the real life of parenting through the teenage years. REAL. Super real. I've already blogged (practically shouting) full posts to the world (in my mind) several times. Things that I'm going to want to know we experienced and navigated through. Things I'm going to want to remember how we felt and what remedies we tried. Things that combat insecurity, anger, hurt, first loves, temptations, friendships, whatever defines "cool", feeling misunderstood, feeling overlooked, and the awkwardness that exists inside an underdeveloped brain and a rapidly developing body. Honesty people. I need to break it down and give the world parenting a teenager in the most honest format I can give it. Since it's practically bursting out of me I am kind of feeling relief even just talking about it.

I should probably end with how much I genuinely adore my boy. I think you already know this though. He's beautiful (and smart) and kind and empathetic and fun and quirky and thoughtful and witty and cautious and logical and gentle and really a more than decent human being. He also makes decisions that dumbfound me. And so it is.

Okay, off to sleep. It's late, yo.

hey.
so, i love october.
i especially love the november weather  that october is bringing us. (november is my favorite)
it brings an especially sweet kind of feeling.

tonight i was driving and all i could think about again was how different i want my life to be.
am i so lame for always thinking about that?
i wanted to be sitting on the porch of my house. my thought was that if i had that porch we would read scriptures each night just as dusk hit. it's my favorite time of night and that seems like a really beautiful moment to have when we're home.

i want to freshen up our bikes and go on bike rides.
i want to have time for a much slower, more simple life.
clearly i need to work. and service is really important to me. working and serving take up most of my time.
which is good to have time taken since the boy is a teenager and he has his own agenda of sorts with school, sports, scouts, church, and a social life.
all these things make life so busy...you know this.  i don't even know why i'm explaining it...you do this too.

i just feel sometimes like i'm missing the point. the point of life is not this.
and then it's like i missed the actual thing i was supposed to be doing somewhere in the midst of choosing other things. only i still don't know what it is. maybe i'll never know. maybe i'll just fill up my life with all of these possibilities and live in a state of "not quite content" and that will be that.

life is tricky.
my job is tricky. the children (more their stories), coworkers, planning, stuffing a lot of good intentions into days where 1 of those intentions actually might occur, leaders, lack of leaders, turnovers, and caddy women...all tricky.
parenting is tricky.
co-not-parenting is tricky. we don't parent together, but we share a human, and that's tricky.
relationships are tricky.
families are tricky.
money is tricky. spending it, not spending it, earning it, all of it.
faith can be tricky. believing in something that you can't see. a story you only learn about through scripture and others. thankfully the holy ghost makes it a lot less tricky. but when those confusing parts slip in and faith is tested things seem a little out of sorts until the moment of clarity brings welcomed peace.

i want a house.
i want more space, less stuff, and a different place for us to us to call home.
i want more time. i feel like i'm losing my little boy.
in 3 years he'll be off to college. but this is when i need to tuck him under my wing and nurture him even more. when i need to help him understand himself and make sense of life so he is strong and healthy and good. i need to cram all those skills that help him to feel competent and knowledgeable and equipped. i need him to recognize and know love as beautiful, and not hurtful or confusing. i need him to know that fatherhood and family is also beautiful and he will get to make it his own. i need him to have a firm spiritual identity and know how to make that the foundation of everything else in his life.
i need to eat differently. my diet is similar to that of Buddy the Elf. and workout. and feel good.
and i want to travel.
i want to step outside of my little bubble and see the world. i need a shift in perspective.
and i want to rock babies.

so i think the moral of all my wants is to sell everything i own. buy a small, modest home.
travel the world with my boy and teach him decent things.
while we're away we'll visit orphanages and rock babies.
or i'll start volunteering at the children's shelter and rock those babies.
or i'll babysit.
we'll ride bikes and read scriptures at dusk.
and somewhere in that i'll start taking better care of myself with all that shift in perspective.
and perhaps there will be enough clarity in all that to know what it is i'm supposed to actually be doing. or maybe i'll finally realize i'm doing it.

for now, i'll go to bed and prepare for a 4am wakeup to start another day of the life i'm not really supposed to be living. on the upside, the weather will be lovely.

wide awake.

hello there, it's july.
the plan for this summer was to detox, relax, workout, organize, declutter, earn extra money, chill.
the reality has been very busy, lots of chauffeuring the boy around, lots of anxiety and worry, lots of intense parenting, lots of work to maintain spiritual growth, and very very little sleep.
sometimes my aching heart feels tangible.  like i can actually feel the ache.
hopefully that was just june.
i have july to get it together right?
july will be my month.
i will get it together.

cause august brings complicated coworkers and if i don't get it together my sensitive insides might crumble.
get a backbone already, right?
they will sense my weaknesses and rip me to shreds.
actually, i'm quite logical about it all most moments.
it's just that the evenings are so overwhelmingly full of worry that i don't dare close my eyes before i'm certain i will fall quickly into a deep slumber.
so here i am blogging at 2am.

come on july.
be good to this gal.

Ms.G's Field Trip Ambitions

Over there you see our field trip details!  We reeeeeeally want to go and I'm raising MONEY!!  If you could help me spread the word  so I can get contributions for these 8 year old littles it would be A-MAZ-ING!

UPDATE:

The field trip has been fully funded!!!

Thank YOU, and your friends and your family members, and their friends and family members...and so on! You people are dreamy and this school year we'll be off to do a dreamy thing, too. THANK YOU!

today.
wake up whenever i want.
make eggs cause i have time.
email the last bit of forms for some of the boys summer trips...cause i finally have a sec to do it.
play tetris.
watch Y&R.
give myself a mani/pedi.
go get them polished.
go to chiropractor.
get shaved ice with the boy.
rent redbox movies and pull out the couchbed.
pick up a little bit.
be lazy.

friday.
decorate and prep for 2 high school graduations.

saturday.
celebrate.

sunday.
be spiritually fed.

monday.
the boy's first day of conditioning camp AND driver's ed.
my first day of a more scheduled summer walking workout.
back in the new classroom to make sense of the chaos.
leave with some peace of mind.

and so it continues...

i think summer will feel successful if I...
clean out my storage unit.  it's full again so really getting rid of kinder things and a lot of old things and things being saved for a house and such.  just get.rid.of.things.  so this is 2 parts...get rid of stuff (!!) and organize what's left.
clean out my apartment (again) in the same way as above.  i think i could get rid of even more.
have the mother of yard sales (maybe even an apartment wide community sale) and purge.  then donate the rest...nothing goes back inside!
walk everyday twice a day.  morning and evening.  maybe i stay in workout clothes all day long, i don't know but I reeeeeeeally want to make this happen.
do yoga at least once a week.  maybe even just get a yoga dvd to do it more often in my space but utilize the free classes in town and really do it.  i feel so much better when i do.
green smoothies everyday. try new combos and veggies.
experiment with pinterest recipes (or new recipes in general).

work on system for organizing curriculum for next year. 
put together things for next year (print, copy, laminate, draw, create, etc)....units, activities, games, folders, binders, the list goes on and on and the possibilities are limitless.
reconfigure classroom since i'm moving rooms (brain.overload....i usually sit and stare at my space for hours trying to perfect this)
apply for promethean board grant
try to raise the rest of the money for our field trip ambitions!!
aug 1st apply for field trip grant

work to earn extra money!!  get a job? tutor? do workshops? babysit? clean? donate plasma? all of that????
write a children's book.  i KNOW i can do this in one summer.  it's on the tip of my tongue.  if nothing else i can at least get the words on paper.

figure out if we need to move or stay in our treehouse.  and if we need to move then i guess we'll be moving this summer which is a to do list in itself.

help the boy to have a happy summer in all his travels.  he is having a once in a lifetime summer!!!
and finally, if i reconnect with friends and visit and hang out and laugh and have fun i will feel success

hello my lovely blog readers!  i have news for you.  my son is beautiful.  okay, that's not news, but omgosh.  soon i will gift you with updated pictures.  i see this 6ft tall boy everyday.  i cut his hair and give him the perfectly clean, fresh, polished look he's hoping for (mostly...i'm no pro and sometimes it shows!) every week.  i see his face get stubbly and then soft and clean shaven. i am seeing his skin shift to a more golden color right now because of conditioning and practicing for football outside everyday for 3 hours.  i see him anxious for sleep at night because of his extended school day that begins with early morning seminary and ends with the intense physicalities of varsity football (these select freshman have to earn their respect on varsity, right?).  i see his attire of solids mostly black, white, gray, browns, blues, greens (blue and green are his school colors), and occasionally pops of bright color.  he's a solid tshirt with a pocket guy with solid shorts or jeans...very simple.  and his shoes rotate between classic converse, classic vans, or an old school style pair of addidas that have recently been thrown into the mix. he wears a gold duct tape strip around his backpack strap connecting himself to a ton of other boys that are also sporting the strip.  they even have a name for themselves and a salute or a nod or a handshake or a nickname.  (is that my sentimental way of describing a gang??  kidding...it's totally not;) he collects mostly As and occasionally Bs for his academic portfolio, but holds a 4.0 or higher (because of his higher level classes) GPA. he doesn't quite get the concept of working hard for these grades but i suspect that soon he will need to exert more effort and that will be a learning process altogether.  slacks, an ironed dress shirt, a tie, and dress shoes are a part of his weekly attire. he wears this to church where he learns more about how to connect with the plan Heavenly Father has for him, to firesides that are meant to uplift rejuvenate and strengthen him, to serve families by giving them a spiritual message or seeing if they have any needs he can help them with, to banquets celebrating his athletic accomplishments, and to ceremonies celebrating his academic achievements.

he makes mistakes.  he is grouchy or moody or slips the most sarcastic tone into his speech effortlessly.  he's not always as empathetic or sympathetic towards others as he should be. sometimes challenges are big and sometimes they are small.  he is a teenager and learning. sometimes life is just confusing. he's not perfect, but he's learning.  and he's beautiful.
i see him   everyday but the other day as he was coming out from practice i saw a more grownup version of him and got to soak in how beautiful he is.  i hope he is happy.  i hope he feels like he's lived a good life so far.  and i hope he feels confident and hopeful about his future. i hope sometimes he sees it too...that he's beautiful.  and that beautiful and hot/cool/etc. are different things entirely. 

so i have been working on this field trip for 2 years now with no avail.  it is beyond our field trip budget at school.  in fact, our budget is laughable in comparison.  but look at this! who can turn their heads from this??  don't you want to be there, like RIGHT NOW?  the thought of my students being able to do these things makes me so happy that i haven't been able to give up on the idea just yet.  so i'm trying this campaign through indiegogo because i am hearing really great things about it.  it got me all excited about the possibilities again.  click on the picture and it should link you straight to the campaign. check it out and spread the word.  and if we go i'll tell you all about it! (yes, i'll actually blog about something again;)  happy monday!

Hey so um, yeah.
I'm feeling reflective.  I've been writing this week.
And reading and pondering a lot the last few weeks.
I've been letting some things soak in and I'm realizing that I'm in kind of an odd spiral of chaos. Even while mostly feeling cheerful and positive daily, there is a core of doubt and insecurities that I am feeding.  And it's keeping me from progressing.

I have always beat to my own drum a bit and so I've never really compared myself to others in a way of wanting to be like them.  But what I have been doing since making big life altering decisions almost 15 years ago is gauging where I'm at in life to those around me.
I've never been envious of what others have or look like because I feel like I am pretty genuine in my excitement and appreciation for those things.  I love what people look like...truly.  I love the quirks and beauty in even a stray curl and often when I look at people I want to draw them....that's how detailed I see people.  And I always try to make the eyes or the body movement match the depth or personality. Even if a pencil never touches paper, I sketch them or create them with various paper mediums in my mind.
I love when people find good deals or treasures or splurge or create or arrange or organize in a way that expresses themselves or their family and I am usually empathetic-ly right there in their moment.

But because I am venturing off pioneer style in this new life (of educated and spiritual and budget wise and fanatically dedicated to motherhood) I do often (and have for a long time) compare what I am doing and how it's working for me/my family to what others are doing and how that's working for them.  And this often translates into some very negative self talk. I have had to teach myself so much logic that when my instincts creep in and do their usual impulsiveoverthetopness I scold and distrust myself, and feel embarrassed and uneasy about my decisions.  And I think enough of this self talk will wear down a spirit.
And while I am simultaneously wearing myself down, I am working to build myself up by trying to stay particularly in tune with the way Heavenly Father wants me to live and for the most part doing that...but also overlooking some pretty clear messages of how to gain eternal happiness because I'm too busy setting my own expectations and kind of constantly not meeting them....and often not even trying.

I want the peace that comes from eternal happiness.  I want contentment.  And I know that I've been so overwhelmed at making these kinds of decisions or even following through with living the details by myself, and not at all feeling comfortable enough to turn to family or friends or visiting teachers or home teachers because it appears needy and that's uncomfortable and exhausting. And then while I sit in my unsure state almost doing nothing (so that I don't choose the wrong thing) I put myself into a place of stuck.  It gets confusing there and the details of life get construed.

Even in a place of stuck I have done the things I felt prompted to do...get my education, even continue on to graduate school, be a teacher, have a relationship with God, be a part of a church family, and the very detailed consistencies of parenting and mothering.  Those things I feel really good about.  Those are things I feel like Heavenly Father told me I should be doing.  Those are the things that make up my life.  Those are the things I do and live for every single day.

Yet as I approach my 35th birthday I feel frantic that I'm running out of time.  I'm getting out of the "setting up the life I'm going to live" phase and entering into the "this is what you did now live with it" phase.  I didn't find the guy to spend my life with.  I didn't even look.  I wasn't even interested in trying to look because I got really happy without that component of love.  But without him I didn't grow the additional babies I yearn(ed) for.  And with the risks that come at this particular age, I'm coming to terms with the fact that I likely won't mother more littles of my own again.  The career that I felt prompted to do and that I really do like doing brings me a salary that doesn't allow for much temporally.  I feel insecure about not being able to give my boy a house or a yard or more space to physically grow and mature in.  I need to teach 9 more classrooms of public school children and I'll have saved myself a lot of money through the student loan forgiveness program...so my job and my income are solidified for a while.  Our budget just doesn't allow for extra and I know my mind does not live within my means. So my list of wants is unattainable and I am constantly disappointed.  Because even in those basic ideals of living educated, with God, in a church family, and for the career I worked for and the with the boy that makes up my family, everyday I want more.  I want to be able to pay for the things we need and want (within reason) with no hesitation.  I want to provide more experiences and opportunities for my child and even for myself.  I want to do lavish things for fun on my own dime.  I want to live with less caution and less guilt.

So now my task is to live for now.  To find a way to soften my heart to truly live for Heavenly Father and find real peace with what I have and what I'm doing.  And to not look to others to gauge my place in this world, but to look to God.  And to know that what I have is enough.

a few weeks ago i was scanning a paper that formally listed the names of my peers. as i read each name i thoughtfully considered each of them. i thought about their connection to the students, their effort, their skill, their passion for their work. i never looked for a version of perfection (mainly because this job doesn't allow perfection to exist), rather i searched for those that are doing good. good for the littles they teach and good for the bigs they teach with. cause lets face it, education is stressful and doing good is just plain ol necessity. i'll be honest that i was one of 2people left at the library tables still pondering my peers and wanting to be thoughtful and knowing that i hadn't even considered my options before because of how blasted busy we had been. i made my markings on my paper turned it in to the ballot box, and left the room.


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last week i learned that as i sat in that library pondering my people, i was among others that were pondering ME...my teaching, and my good deeds. and some of them even deemed me worthy enough to mark their pencil on my name. and now my name sits on a nominee form forTeacher of the Year AND Humanitarian of the Year. both categories! what kindness. what sweet delicious kindness. i don't even care what happens next because the goodness that has come from this kind of recognition is surprisingly uplifting in all the ways necessary. my name folks. they nominated me for good.

i adore my child.
and motherhood.
and parenting.
i have loved it from the moment i acknowledged the reality of a little body growing in my womb.
it was as if his little self was literally embracing my heart as he grew and preparing me for our meeting on the outside.
and when he came, the fresh warm sweetness of him melted into my skin in a way that kept us one and reminded us both that we are bonded in this earthly experience.
i don't know why a nineteen year old wreck gets a baby.
or is trusted with the grand responsibility of teaching, assisting, and loving a person through life.
now my boy is a year older than i was when i met his dad.
life is confusing and odd and fragile.
and i get to help a teenager make sense of the world and find his place in it.
i get to help him uncomplicate his story, or be content with the flaws and decide how he will write the rest of it.
he is becoming a man. 
how did enough time pass that he is transitioning into a young man?
i love him.
i have loved him since i felt him shifting his folded body inside me, every moment of his warm baby scented goodness, all through his curious toddler years, and then through the blissful stages of childhood.  he has been the funnest, sweetest, most precious boy to love.
i have loved him through his preteen confusions frustrations and worries. i nurtured and healed and loved him into a teenager. 
and now here we are.  i am still loving him as he navigates through friendships and cute girls and coaches and classes that determine his one-day-life's work, and scouting and church responsibilities and finding (literally searching;) for the joy in serving others. i love seeing his heart respond to children and animals.  i love seeing his cautious, slow to warm up self make a connection.  i love when the walls come down and someone else gets a glimpse of this boy i've been loving for fourteen years. 
i love the clarity and goodness that exists in the walls of our home and in the foundation of our family...the two of us.  it is far from perfect, but it is where we bond.  where we learn about life, and purpose.  it's where we are rejuvenated and made whole again.  it is our happy.

i should probably note that the magnitude of what my cute boy has done for me has been beyond anything i could have ever known or experienced otherwise.  it has been life-changing and miraculous and beautiful (i never never said perfect).
i can't believe i get to be called mother.
i'm so glad heavenly father knows what he's doing.

I am perhaps one of the very best big picture analysts.  I get it.  I get the big picture of most things, or I can find it quickly.  My brain is good at these sorts of things.  I suppose I can even pinpoint the little things quite well.  I feel okay saying that.  However.  However, I am not so grand at implementing those little things.  Those little things that eventually align with the big picture, that make everything make sense in the grand ways that it should.  Those little things I recognize and acknowledge and talk about and dream about and plan and well....disregard.
I don't know if I'm lazy by nature, or if biologically things like my thyroid or excess weight drag me down significantly enough, or if my brain is not one that is fantastic at multi-tasking, or if I have developed some pretty hardcore ingrained habits that are beyond difficult to sway, or what.  Perhaps it's all of those.  But I am really bad at implementing the little things.

And so naturally when I'm making my 2013 resolutions and trying to be reflective of my past year(s) I can recognize, even pinpoint (as I've done in the past) exactly where and what I'm doing wrong, and even make beautiful heartfelt declarations so spot on of what I need to do in order for life to be different, better.  And then instantaneously I take a step to live life and it's like I'm stepping off a cliff into the great big empty openness of wrong.  I forget.  or something.  I realize mid-chew what I'm eating, or fall into my pillow and night and jolt up realizing I skipped praying on my knees again, and "ugh it's Monday and I forgot to plan a family night again", and will i ever remember to floss a day in my life?, and why am I talking in this tone to my beeeautiful child?, and mooooooooooore.  Maybe I'm just not so aware.  I try to be insanely aware of everything though, so that can't be it.  Maybe I'm not as in the moment (again back to the slow processing of my brain).  I might be on to something here.  I know that life is way more fantastic for me when I prepare.  I have to have time to process.  When I am prepared, I can be great.  At making the meal I wanted to make, at teaching the lesson I wanted to teach, at ending the day with family scripture study, at fitting in the walk/workout, at making time to ponder and write, at being better for this teenager who's likely watching my every move. 

So I'm thinking how I spend my time is pretty significant.  Making time to prepare and plan and process.  And then having the umf and courage to go do it.

My lists are pouring out all over the place with things like walking and yoga, and taking care of much needed medical needs.  I learned this week that plantar fascitis (my big fat feet problem I've been crippling from this past year) happens a lot of the time from hypothyroidism!  Wha???  I still don't even understand how or why or wha??  but it makes a ton of since as to why my feet are so fragile.  And why again have I been ignoring my thyroid issues?  I have no idea why I don't respect this body of mine more.  But nevertheless, it's on my list of resolutions to tend to my thyroid troubles and see what other ailments that might cure....fatigue, weight, menstrual mumbo jumbo, FEEEEET.  I also have my teeth to take better care of, and teenage wisdom teeth to remove, and possibly even add the braces said teenager is requesting.  I have the last little bits of my debts to shew away, and a credit score to build up, and patience to be had in this process.  Also making the list this year is living more within our means.  This requires a lot more planning and preparation in the ol kitchen for me.  Nothing new, just the same goals to find more recipes and cook more.  Which also requires us to have more evenings at home and to demand that life gives us that.  I'll have to say no more.  I'll have to be more efficient with my time at work.  I'll have to be better at prioritizing and budgeting.  Living within our means also means reserving the first part of the pay check for tithing which feels unbelievably hard. always.  It's good, and I believe in the principle, but I never know how to follow through and make it work.  I suppose you just do it (follow through) and you do (make it work).  Professionally my goals are the same...to PLAN and PREPARE.  I am in such a habit of winging it and I know it will be life changing to be more prepared and less spontaneous in my teaching moments.  I also want to be more positive, uplifting, and patient.  Maybe gentle is the word I'm looking for.  Either way, it's children and I want to be better for them.

This year the boy is not making a single resolution.  He's practically declaring his stance at absolutely not a single ounce of planning his year.  Which is kind of hilarious to me since there are a ton of things (to me) that he needs to plan.  In January this freshman boy will be moved to the varsity football class.  This does make me slightly sick (for many reasons) as a momma, but I rely on the spirit to know how to help him process the culture of football and navigate his own sense of self and manhood through it.  He does a good job, and as long as it is something to excel in physically and a way to learn limits and boundaries and strength and endurance I can support that.  There is incredible competition among the boys, and a major amount of arrogance and authoritarian bullying(ish) from coaches in this great world of football.  And so I try my darnedest to counteract it all with really great men.  Youth leaders and friends that love and support this boy of mine in grand ways that fill the stands, and spend a good amount of time with him even in nonfootball playing ways.  And we cheer him on while he pushes and gets pushed and we delight in his abilities.  Plus, it's an accomplishment!  freshman on varsity = job well done!!  At the close of 2013 the boy will earn his Eagle Scout rank.  This time next year the plan is to hold a celebration of this accomplishment.  And so I suppose I will do the planning and prodding and he will do the implementing based on my resolution for him since he is NOT "setting any resolutions" himself;)  He will also learn how to drive.  He does a really good job already (due to some country driving), but I suppose I can commit to more extensive teaching.  Since I only have about 3 more years left with him at home I am feeling particularly anxious about all he still needs to learn.  So I'm thinking about a Need to Know Night of the week where we dedicate time to teaching him things he'll need to know when he ventures out on his own (that whole venturing out on his own thing really has to happen right?).  Academically he's doing well, but since I'm the parent with great example and influence I have taught some of the small detail descrepencies in routine and structure that he can stand to be better at...then I guess I have to remodel/reteach/and we practice what it looks and feels like to not procrastinate or cram and other sorts of habits that cause unnecessary chaos in life.

There's more I'm sure of it.  More that would make life feel more accomplished and good.  Those things I'll figure out as the year goes along.  For now I'll focus on aligning all the little details of life with the big picture goals.  I'll commit to making the little things that take a lot of effort feel more effortLESS.  And hopefully along the way there will be a lot of fun and laughter....cause we need those things too.  Cheers to a new year!