End of days?

I am quite an observant person. and people around me tend to tell me their deepest darkest secrets. as bad as they can be, I try my very best not to judge. Because once you start judging, you tend to talk bad about that person, karma might bite your ass back and then for all you know you turn into that person. but if that person is super duper annoying and deserves to be talked about and did something wrong to me, then unfortunately i'm not an angel to stop myself from bitching about him/her.

however.. look around. natural disasters are like daily news. people with no moral values. too common until we ourselves couldn't care less about them. i remember last time during form 1, when heard someone lost his/her virginity, my friends and i would be like "omg. kenapa cam tu? tak sayang ke?" and then now, the reaction would be like.. "owh.. biasa laa tu. nak buat camne. not surprised".

well, this morning i kept on thinking about this. the end of days is coming soon. maybe this is why the daily news in Malaysia are bizarre but common to us.

i am no angel neither am i a devil. but if I can, I try my best to stop myself from doing any of the big sins.ok. maybe part mengumpat tu da terlalu sebati dgn jiwa. that requires a proper soul cleansing. but really, i do try to minimise bitching. and best just to say it straight to that person's face. no matter how harsh it is, it's really rewarding when you just say it to that person's face. contohnye. "you're being a bitch. please deal with it or end of friendship". something like that.

practice makes perfect. once you do it, you don't even have the need to bitch anymore!

ok. point is... it's good to remind each other not to commit sins. i have friends who constantly remind me, and thankfully it's working. at first you may think, owh.. that's my business.why do you even bother? but just remember, only good friends care enough to even bother giving you advise. they are the ones who you can count on when you're in trouble.

*LOVES*

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

I ACTUALLY HAVE TONS OF PICS TO UPLOAD BUT BLOGSPOT ONLY ALLOWS A MAXIMUM OF FIVE PICS! Anyways, to those who celebrates, MERRY CHRISTMAS!

lotsa love hugs and kisses

How serious do you want us to get?

What's the definition of a serious relationship?

quite subjective to be honest. it could range from anything really.

it is you and your partner who can only define that.

my bf and i have our own definition.

i've been in and out of relationships, dating etc. all of those didn't work for some reasons. so learning from past experiences, i know what i want in this relationship.

i personally think relationship can only get serious to some extent. same thing as you can only let yourself to love someone to certain extent or else you're the one who'll get hurt. if you're just in a relationship for a few months and already talk about getting married in a few years time, then that's very unlikely. i'm talking from my own past experience.

so as for me, my bf and i are just enjoying each other's company. we talk, we laugh, we go out and do many other things as a couple. and that's pretty much enough for both of us at the moment. we do not feel the need to cling on to each other 24/7. afterall, we both have our studies to worry about and at times we do wanna hang out with our own group of friends. if one day we do wanna be clingy, let it be mutual coz if only one party is clingy and the other is not, then there's no way that's gonna work, is it?

i'm just saying this out coz quite a number of people are questioning whether are we serious about being together. we are happy the way we are right now, thank you.

Successfully passed that *party* stage

i'm getting old. really.

i no longer find parties appealing AT ALL.

back then, when I used to enjoy clubbing, i did not hesitate to go when i get invitations.

and heck, i enjoyed every night out.

i remember going to a club recently with Laura coz it was her birthday. i was reluctant but hey, she made an effort to come to Manchester to celebrate her bday with me, so i just have to return the favour.

i tell you, do not. and i mean it. do not go to clubs on weekends.

the people who were there seriously old enough to be my parents or grandparents. no kidding.

so many middle aged people. i mean seriously. go home and take care of your kids and grandkids.

haihhh... anyways, when i was there, i kept looking at the clock, waiting for the clock to strike at 3am (that's when the club closes). not that i don't enjoy it, i did. but not as much. i got tired from dancing and got so annoyed getting bumped by people coz it was so crowded.

owh well.. that was not the first time i felt like that. last month i went down to London for this party and Goshhh it was horrible.

gladly, i'm getting old. i realise that i enjoy a quiet dinner with the close friends and we just talk. or maybe a shisha session would be fun too. and karaoke! even more fun right?

2010 is a success. i can actually count the number of times i went to parties throughout the year. i can bet you it was no more than 10 nights.

yayyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!

*LOVES*

Fashion or just too much?

sometimes, i feel like i am a boy trapped in a girl's body.

i'm not like many girls, taking the effort everytime they go out, even to a simple mamak restaurant, they would put on something nice and also make up.

as for me, i'd just grab my shorts and t shirt without putting anything on my face and just go. afterall, i'm just going to have roti canai and teh tarik, and there is no need for me to dress up to impress the machas there please.

right. so this morning i was at Syed, and so i saw this couple. the guy was wearing sweater. and the girl was wearing sunglasses. ok. my thought was, damnn... how hot can a mamak restaurant be? ppl, i just came back a cold ass country which was like -2 degrees when i left, and if i could, only if i could, and have the courage, i would just go out around here wearing tank top and shorts. but no. i feel that's inappropriate here.

alright. so that's scene number 1.

in the afternoon, Maliq and I went to Sunway Pyramid. being a critical person, i just can't stand the fashion portrayed by youngsters these days. it's just too much really. if it's not too fancy, i say they're wearing a little too little please. ok. imagine you already wear really short shorts and tank top, and then u wanna feel a bit more sexy by showing ur belly button. nice. but please, wear that when you go lorong haji taib. you'd blend in VERY WELL.

then there was this guy, looked rempit to me. wore freaking leather jacket in freaking shopping mall in MALAYSIA. what the fuckkkkkkkk.... and another guy wore a scarf around his neck. OMG. what's even worse the scarf was trying to look like Burberry tapi tak jadi. how? ok. i don't care much bout the fake scarf, but it was a freaking wool scarf and it's freaking 30 degrees for crying out loud. i know that i have no right. it's a free country. yes, but can some people knock some realistic fashion sense into these people's heads?

people say ohhh Malaysians are critical about clothing and all. well from the above, are we not allowed to be critical? as for the people with baju tak cukup kain, there's a fine line between sexy and slutty. if u wanna look slutty, there are tons of nightclubs around for you to show as much skin as possible. please not in broad daylight. it's not appealing, at all.

i know this issue is kinda petty, but i really do find this annoying.

when people say less is more, i hope some people don't interpret that wrongly.

it means being simple. not too accessorized.

we are in a tropical country with average temperature 30 degrees.

so, i don't see leather jackets and scarves being necessary.

sekian terima kasih.

=)

eat

sleep

eat again

sleep again

and now it's 7.30 in the morning. coz i have been napping too much during the day, i couldn't go back to sleep. soooooooooo weird.

heard the crazy snow in UK?

glad to be running away from the awful chilly weather.

i haven't been revising for a few days. feels even more weird. guess i shall start today.

p/s: i miss you. *hugs*kisses*love*

<3

PMS week

this whole week has been pms week!!! arghhhhhhh

i realise my hormones haven't been behaving very well lately.

i don't usually have pms, or even if i do, i don't think it's severe.

anyways, what happened this whole week was defo unpleasant!!!!!!!!

Cramps for 3 days. Mood swing and bitchy for 5 days.

hehehhe. however, i kinda enjoyed the bitchy part. my mouth somehow went on a rampage. i basically complained bout every single little thing. looking back, i thought it was hilarious.

anyways, today i'm perfectly fine. yesterday, had a bitchfest with my siblings. seriously funny. annoying yet funny. now that's why i try not to tell you guys everything. i tell mama instead coz u guys just loveeeeeeeeeeee to give annoying,unimportant comments just to piss me off. but whatever it is, you 3 bitches are mental! lol. and that includes you little brother. you shouldn't be following your sisters' footsteps AT ALL.

hehe. rant over. truth is siblings are pain in the arse. but they just trying to be a pain coz they find it amusing. in the end of the day, they just tryin to look out for me. and i'm grateful for that. =)

fyi, I CAN'T WAIT!

Quote of the day

i was watching TV and sex and the city was on. so i watched this episode and i don't know why this made me laugh. Samantha Jones was pasting on posters of her lover's picture with a huge word saying "LIAR". a policewoman approached her telling her that it is illegal to do that. and so she replied "This man told me that he loves me and i believed him until the day i caught him meeting with another woman's pussy". so the policewoman backed away, hence approving what she was doing. LOL. i adore Samantha.

hypothetically speaking, you caught your man cheating on you, in front of your eyes. what would you do to him? or to that other woman? hahaha. just a thought coz i remembered being asked that question during a truth or dare session last weekend.

life's been the same old same old. i think 10 days is coming a bit too soon and i don't know why i'm well excited. not that i've never done this before. hehehe. it's 2.13 am. and i don't feel like sleeping. i shall skip my 9am lecture. i miss you, you and you there.. in Malaysia. you know who you are. wish i could board a plane and see all of you now coz i miss you all terribly. *hugs and kisses*

Let lose

if i lose that one thing, then i don't think there's a point to any of this anymore.

that was what i thought earlier.

i think women should learn how to switch off their unnecessary thoughts. really.

i think we think wayyyyyyyyyyy too much.

probably 100x more than men do.

that's why the saying "men are from Mars and women are from Venus" is true.

sometimes, i wish i was a man. well atleast the part where you think less. we women are too complex. how to make us simpler?

i enjoy laughter. i enjoy happiness. i hate thinking the unnecessary coz that only contributes to sadness.

but the more i try to stop those thoughts, i tend to think even more. which is even worse right. argh. where is the switch off button when i need one?

ok. switched off.

i will be fine. =D

on a lighter note, 2o days!!!!!!!! i can't wait!

*LOVES*

It feels like a bitch fest

i'm feeling pretty bitchy right now. and i'm ready for a downright bitching session.

when i moved into this new flat of mine, i used to wonder why is it constantly warm in this flat eventhough outside temperature is like <15>

and so Nadia and i made a conclusion that probably we've been doing too many sins by bitching/gossiping about people. owhkay. so, i've been toning down a little bit.

the thing is, when you live in Manchester, you meet so many people. and people just tend to piss you off or even make you feel annoyed up to the point where even if that person doesn't do anything wrong to you, his/her presence is enough to drive you up the wall. so yeah FML for having these kinda people around me.

such a contradicting post to the previous one. seriously i love living in Manchester and i'm lucky to be able to study. but there are certain people who i just have to avoid. just so i can prevent myself from bitching about them.

thank you. hehehe. rant over.

but seriously, how i wish to go back to Cambridge where there ain't much bitching going around. argh.

*LOVES*

Pretty amazing!

ever wonder why life is so blessed?

ever wonder how and why you deserve all these blessings coz most of the time you just do shit?

i do wonder at times.

as a Muslim, i'm not perfect. at all.

for my sins and wrongdoings, i don't think i deserve what i have now.

a huge blessing.

yesterday, i had a 2 1/2 hours skype conference with two of my closest friends - Maliq and Batch. and of course Jaja too, tp die tak byk ckp. hope u get well soon dear. skyping with them. made me laugh non stop. that loud high pitch witch cackle that i thought i haven't had for quite sometime.you both brought the worst in me. wth that's the best feeling ever. i love you both. you both are one of the many blessings in my life. =D

and mama called while i was out with friends. complaining about my two cats that constantly fight. another blessing. getting to hear my mother's voice, eventhough she's thousands of miles away from me. she calls me every few days. usually i would forget to ask her to call. but she never forgets. knowing that my family is healthy and safe and all well is a true blessing.

then the best friend sms me this morning when i was still fast asleep. a blessing to hear from her after she's done her exams. and quickly told her that i miss her. and longing to hear updates from her. i miss you, shera.

yeh so i woke up this morning and just wondered. why so blessed?

Alhamdulillah, is all i can say.

maybe one day if Allah wanna take it all away, He can just do it in a second.

so, appreciate. life is beautiful. more than you actually realised.

*LOVES*

Long Gone!

It's been almost 3 months since my last post. sorry guys, guess current life is keeping me way too busy til i have no time to think about updating my blog.

anyways, incase you didn't know, i'm back in my second home, Manchester. good to be back but at the same time uni life is driving me nuts. nuts as it may seem, i'm enjoying my life as well =)

where to start? well... before the start of uni term, my friends and i went for a short trip to Barcelona. i thought the city was amazing. sunshine. perfect weather. a total opposite of UK. spanish men and women. owh so pretty. cuci mata baek punya. anyways, stayed in a cosy little apartment that had 2 bedrooms and 1 sofa bed. just enough for the 5 of us - me, Aina, Diyana, Dan and Alvin. trip was too short for us to explore Barcelona. hope to visit again. coz sure was a sweet sweet memory. =D

then uni started. oh my. 9-5 pm every other day. i thought i was going mad. felt tired all the time but now i'm pretty much used to it. it's already the 9th week fyi. sooooo fast! but hey, i can't wait for Christmas break! ooh ooh breaking news. i've been studying ALMOST everyday now. pretty much proud of myself considering the past 2 years i chose to put other things e.g MSSM as top priority, hence the reason why i only managed to get a borderline 2nd upper class for my 2nd year. nevertheless, i was very much satisfied with my achievement. was actually expecting 2nd lower class, considering the 1 month before exam preparation. not impressed!

good news is i am slowly gaining back my quiet social life, thank God. MSSM is out of the way. as much as i love the freedom, my heart constantly aches for the sorely missed preparation of big events, the committee meetings and basically meeting new people. the annual general meeting was a week ago. and believe it or not, i cried when my president announced that the committee is dissolved. pardon me for the emotional ex vice president, but i think i had the best committee one can ever ask for.. and plus i'm gonna miss all the bitching and gossiping sessions we had everytime we had meetings. we pretty much compliment each other in the committee, and for that i am grateful. no dramas in the committee. mr ex pres Shang Neng sure did an amazing job in leading our committee. three cheers to you! my beautiful sweet girls - Shwu Wei, Fion, Jacqueline, Sue Jinn, Yee You, Lay Pin and Pearl - u girls are like sisters to me eventhough you enjoy calling me mummy. i love you. the boys - Gray, Syaz, Lucas and Tian Ji.. so few of you but we definitely bonded well. gonna miss the jokes and laughter with y'all. =)

and now i have quite a regular daily routine. wake up. shower. go to class. come back from class. nap. tv series. cook. eat. gossip session with Nadia or Dan or sometimes both of them, and sometimes Khairi will join in too. revise. sleep. then some days will go out with a couple of friends, just chill at a shisha cafe or dinner.

i like how it is now.

The apple of my eye

incase you haven't met these two little sweethearts, the one with the brown and white coat is Molly and the one with grey and white coat is Nemo. Molly belongs to my sis, Ratih and Nemo is Haimi's. Nemo just started to stay with us permanently and we have been bff ever since. Molly on the other hand is very bitchy to me, which is why she's constantly being bullied by me.

i love both equally but Nemo is the only one who can put up with me who likes to cuddle, kiss and hug cats. hehehhe.

2 weeks and i'm leaving them. this is heartbreaking =(

*LOVES*

The Women

at times, your head feels like arghhh and men just keep giving you headache.

then this what you do.

call up a bunch of girlfriends.

and just have a proper girls night out.

no.

not clubbing.

just a 4-hour dinner.

just spill out the crap you're going through and

voila... problem solved!

me. aina. hayat. amenie.

four girls.

each has different problems.

all men related.

rather than crying over a spilled milk, we ended up laughing non stop.

sampai nak pecah perut.

fyi i don't hate men. but the things some of them do, it's pretty despicable.

but yeh women nowadays are equally disgusting.

hmm.. whatever.

people keep on asking why am i single.

ko ingat senang2 ke aku nak kutip laki tepi jalan.da la bkn senang nak dpt yg baik2.

after dinner with the girls, we made a conclusion.

as far as i'm concern, i'm no longer worried about not having a guy in my life.

coz i'm pretty much contented with what i have now.

the friends that i can laugh and cry with.

the howling laughters of us 4 girls. epic.

atap2 semua boleh tercabut. =)

*LOVES*

3 weeks

been M.I.A.ing. truth is, not even bothered to open my blog til today.

summer has been incredibly relaxing.

too bad it will end in three weeks time. boohoo!

whatever it is, reality check. i'm a third year student now.

how time flies.

unlike the other third years,this won't be my final year. why?

coz Pharmacy is a four year course. hehehe. 2 more years and i will graduate.

Insya Allah.

i do wonder at times how life can fastforward without us realising.

and how people can change in a split second.

and how love can turn into hate.

and how friendship grows into a relationship.

just with a blink of the eye.

btw, it is fasting month. 12 more days to go. i love Ramadhan. really i do. everyone just seems so calm and patient during this month. lol. but i miss being able to eat a lot. now my appetite decreased and my only worry is that i will lose weight. thankfully, i'm still maintaining 57kg. wheeheee. i'm trying to reach 60kg. doubt it will happen with my hectic lifestyle in Manchester. no way.

i have started being busy with MSSM again. freshers are coming this September and cant wait!! preparation for freshers' week! events coming up. need to scout for potential successor. it's been a long way already. my committee and i are way too exhausted and we're just waiting mid November to step down. 1 year of taking up this responsibility has taught me enough.

3rd year will be all about focusing on studies. not gonna be a total geek, but hoping there will be a consistency in revision. i'd still wanna have fun every now and then. and lets hope for no drama involving me, shall we? i love watching other people's dramas, but not mine.

*LOVES*

Too Relaxed!

it's been a while. i know. hehehe. eventhough i'm a bit too free nowadays, i wasn't bothered to update my blog. guess it's time.

last weekend was Ratih and Haimi's wedding reception at Tropicana. yay! this time, no kerja buruh thank you. all done by Haimi's family and friends.. so the rombongan pengantin perempuan just came as guests and we just needed to look pretty. yes! =)

so far i'm enjoying myself staying at home! i love eating, sleeping and watching tv. a recipe to turn obese but what the heck.. i wont get to do this when i'm back in Manchester. i go out with my friends at times... maybe 2-3 times a week. other times, just enjoy goin out with my mum and siblings!

anyways, due to the raging hormones i'm having for the past 2 years (since late 2008)... i've been getting quite serious breakouts.. ok not up to the point where i get huge acne all over my face. but still to me, quite severe coz two years ago i had friggin flawless skin! so i finally decided to go to dermatologist 2 weeks ago and she gave me this medicine called Roaccutane. sis Ratih took it before and now acne GONE! i've been taking the medicine for 2 weeks and yes... quite happy with the results! and skin becomes less oily and redness reduce. haisshh.. see being fair skin is not all good, people! breakouts are so obvious on me! but on people with darker skin.. so lucky! not obvious at all!

okies rant over. damnn.. 7 weeks has passed since i came home. 7 more weeks to go. =(

*LOVES*

The Wedding

i had been waiting for years for my eldest sister Ratih to get married to her long time bf (now husband), Haimi. i regard Haimi as my bro in law since a few years ago, but now it's official.

Alhamdulillah.

it all went well.

on 8th July, Haimi and Ratih officially tied the knot. the akad nikah ceremony was held at my house.. with over 200 guests mainly the extended family, neighbours and close friends. the day before, my aunts (mom's sisters) came over to help with the packing. wedding is a family affair. and i think Haimi already knew from the beginning that he's not only married to Ratih, but also to the Hj Abdul Malik's extended family. owh yes. hehehe.

the ceremony went OK. of course, papa, being himself, very cranky and agitated but i expected that anyway. thankfully, both pa and Haimi had to "lafaz" only once. phew. but papa was really nervous and voice was so shaky. first time had to give his daughter away.

after that, the photography session was the highlight. mcm nak masuk majalah URTV kot. haishhh... oohh... and thank you to my KTJ friends - Aina, Hayat, Ibrahim, Aidy and Asyraf for coming. =) sorry was too busy tho. huhu.

on 10th July was the wedding reception at Hilton PJ. i thought i wouldn't have the energy to lead the usherers. but i did. think it was the dress i wore. i loved it. thanks pa and ma. hehehe. anyways, everything went OK except some mangkuk hayun guests brought extra people when they RSVPed only 2 people are coming. ok people. if you were to do such thing when the reception is at home, that's fine. but please, when you go to hotel reception, that's a no-no. with limited number of seats in the ballroom and the host allocated the seating, please do not pandai2 move tables or bring extra people. kesian orang lain. mangkuk btul.

anyways, whatever it is, i have to thank my cousins, aunties and uncles for doing the kerja buruh - ushering the guests. lol. and my fav people - my Subang friends. thank you for coming!! and i miss you already. -Shera, Al, Batch, Nina, Maliq and Azzy.

Syam, Jaja and Pia should have been there!! =(

Raja Diyana is the luckiest. both akad nikah and reception pon datang. ehhehe. nasib baik you jiran i jugak. lol.

as tiring/hectic this wedding may seem, i love it coz it was a family affair. hmm. more like the keluarga Malik affair. seriously.

here's to the couple who can stand each other for the past 9 years.

i really have no idea how you two did it. and now you have the rest of your life to quarrel! hahahha. fyi, niece/nephew a.s.a.p pls. cheh. ingat nak buat anak ni mcm nak memasak ke ape. anyways, i wish both of you a happy married life.

photos will be uploaded later. =)

*LOVES*

KPJ Selangor Specialist Hospital

believe it or not, it has been 2 weeks every since i started my internship at this hospital..

damn i have learned a lot!! and best of all, the pharmacy staff there are awesome!

ok maybe not all of them. but most of them.

i get along with most of them.

one or two. hmm.. not so. dunno. maybe no chemistry. but whatevs.

my priority is to learn.

and not forgetting the other KPJ students doing their practical there.

very very close to them and it seems that at times we're the noisy ones in the pharmacy. luckily the senior staff there are cool.

as i have said before, as a pharmacist i have to memorise the names of hundreds and hundreds of medicines and their functions etc. damnnn... some of the famous ones i have already known. but a lot more others still need to be learned.

the pharmacy in general is really busy especially during the peak period. soooooo many patients. and and some patients have like 10-15 different medicines. what are you? drug addict or something?? haiyooo... but anyways, the busier it gets, the more experience i gain. so no complaints. only yesterday a customer told us that she/he wanted only 1 month supply of 10 diff medicines when i had already carefully finished prepare the 3 month supply as written on the prescription. i quietly cursed under my breath.

today, my 3 favourite Bujang lapoks - Asyraf, Aidy and Ibrahim came to visit me at the hospital, hoping to kidnap me to bring me to karaoke. lol. sorry boys. paid or not paid, staff or not, i'm very much dedicated to my work there. so i talked to them for like 5 minutes. it was annoying already. not the boys.. BUT THEM!! we were talking outside the pharmacy quietly and the hospital staff who passed by us were looking at us in a weird way. mostly the female staff. seriously. what is wrong with you people? 3 good friends of mine came to visit me and talk to me in an appropriate manner i.e no touching, kissing or whatsoever and you have to give me that sting eye. eff u. i don't shag my friends, fyi. i couldn't stand so i had to ask the boys to go home and i sent an apologetic sms saying that some of the staff were giving me a bitch face.

i think Malays should learn to stop staring at people. if you wanna stare at someone, please don't tell your entire group of colleagues/friends to look at that person. if so, tell your friends to not make it so obvious. it is disgusting. my friends and i made up a term for that - rogol mata. really. and those who are old enough to be my father, please know your boundaries!!! is it me not used to this environment? then i wanna make sure when i work i choose a multiracial hospital/city. KL maybe.hmm. or stay in Manchester??

*LOVES*

owh hello 3rd year MPHARM!!

finally!!!

results were out last night and i got 2nd upper class for my 2nd year!

Alhamdulillah.

ok. maybe not as impressive as getting first class. but making it to 3rd year is already enough for me. i mean given the fact that i was busy with many other things besides my studies and just 1 month to study before the exams, i think i did better than i expected.

so yessss!!! i was worried sick for the whole day. i knew that i was going to get the results yesterday so i kept on checking my uni email every hour to see if they sent any notifications regarding the results. lol. how anxious.

so now i can enjoy my summer with no worries. and yes raya in Malaysia again! yay! my flight back to UK will be on 18th September!

i never got the chance to ask my classmates about their results. don't want to be the kepo one asking around. hope everyone did well. if not, resit in August isn't so bad. really. i was already thinking what if i had to resit. hmm.. resit is a 2nd chance. not a death sentence. so best embrace it and make the best out of it.

i wonder what 3rd year would be like?

will it be better or worse than my 2nd year?

hmmmmmm....

______________________________________________

As for current updates, nothing much. just normal routine - work, come home, eat, World cup, sleep. haven't been going out much. everyone's just busy with their own thing.

*LOVES*

Of Caffeine and World Cup

last night, i had like a rush of adrenaline or something like that... so i couldn't sleep til 3am. wtf. after watching italy's disappointing match. actually my bad. coz i took a 3-hour afternoon nap. so yeahhh.

then this morning i had to go to work at 8.15am. fml.
i was dying half way feeling really sleepy. thankfully, i didn't have to prepare medicines for patients today, instead we had a friggin induction.and it's like a whole day thing. so annoying.

thank God. they served coffee for breakfast. i even had teh tarik before i went to work. then for lunch, i had teh ais. ok. this was seriously an overdose of caffeine.

the result - i got a little bit more hyper than usual and couldn't sleep til now. i expected to doze off like right after i came back at 5pm. but nooooo... too much energy. need to channel it somewhere. so watched world cup. portugal vs north korea. portugal scored 7 goals and my baby Ronaldo did too so i jumped and danced around like a mad bitch everytime they scored. hehehe.

i know. i'm channelling my energy to this post. zzzzzzzzzzzzz...

____________________________________________________________________

anyways, on a different note, as much as i miss Manchester, i'm adapting to my life here. true i don't get to go out at night and without parents' consent. true i have to work and come back feeling tired most of the time. true i stay at home a lot more than i did when i was in Manchester. but hey.. i love it. really i do. and everything's compensated by going out for pigging out on the heavenly malaysian food. spending time with family and friends that you don't get to be with in UK is just priceless. so i'm not complaining. hehehe. and working. is just. awesome. so busy. it ain't like working in the clinic last time. working in clinic is like going on a holiday compared to working in hospital. but it's a good exposure. and damnnn there are loads of medicines. but there are a number of popular medicines there like Zithromax, Arcoxia, Celebrex, Diamicron, Clarinase. lol. the list goes on and on. but the only thing i dislike about SMC is the rule stating staff and practical students are not allowed to dye their hair. what is this? school? hell no am i gonna dye hair back to it's original colour!!

ok rant over. i can hear wedding bells!!! sis is getting married!! but feel as thought they've married for years. really.
now... i feel like wanna get married. hahahahah

*LOVES*

owh myyyy owh myyy

i'm homeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!

so happy yet somehow feel something missing!

owh yes. my friends in Manchester.

i just realise how much i miss them.

when we said our goodbyes at Aunty Azimah's BBQ, i had to fight back those tears from coming out!!

owhh well. what to do.

you can't have everyone you love in one place. that's impossible.

anyways, i touched down on Sunday night.

so happy to see my mom, dad, sisters and cat! my bro is still in KTJ. hmm.

next day, my subang gang already called me out. i'm truly blessed to have such friends.

i don't know how some people can ditch their old friends when they have new ones.

old friends are the ones you grow up with. true that we may grow up differently and be at different places, but the memories with old friends are irreplaceable. =)

today was the first day of my internship.

thankfully, my colleagues are nice!! semua gile2.

tp ada laa 1 or 2 yg a bit senyap. maybe need sometime to warm up.

phewwwww... 8.30am to 5 pm is very tiring!!

and today is not considered as busy day. but i already felt tired!

lets just hope i'll last til 15th July!

wondering... when is my result coming out? i need to know a.s.a.p!!

can't even book my flight now!

*LOVES*

Harder than expected

sometimes, you get attached to something. and it's hard to leave it.

and it makes you wonder what happens once you leave it.

for the past few days, i've been doing nothing other than packing and spending time with my friends.

i'm very much attached to my life here.

am i ready to leave this behind?

don't get me wrong, i'm really really excited to go back home and see my family and friends.

but leaving a life that you've built for the past 9 months ain't that easy.

i tell you what, when i'm back in Malaysia, my life changes 180 degrees.

no kidding.

no hectic-ness. no uni. no books. no public transport. no major responsibility. no partying.

for the 1st month, i'll be busy with internship. next two months after that, i'm goin holiday with family and hopefully with my subang gang. and of course, Maliq will be the one constantly bringing me out with our Subang gang. hehehe.

*dunno what happened to our Cherating trip?*

i'm looking forward to:

*my family

*my cat

*Ratih's wedding

*my subang gang

*my ktj gang

*holiday in Krabi

*basically just spend time with my loved ones =)

tell you what i'm gonna miss when i'm back in Malaysia :

*my gang Melayu Manchester

*the Cina gang

*my committee

*MSSM events

*late night dinners and movies

*shisha session

*come home after midnight hahahaha

nahh.. i don't miss the parties. i've gone past that stage. i feel old now and i rather have a chilled night out rather than dancing all night. once in a while is fine but you just get tired of it somehow.

YES. i feel sad to leave.

well, you gotta lose something to gain something right?

last night is tonight.

tomorrow morning, goin to Aunty Azimah's farewell.

will board the plane at night.

i'm missing everyone already. =(

*LOVES*

Life's too short

life's too short.

appreciate what you have now.

you need to wake up in the morning.

look at yourself in the mirror. look outside your window.

smile.

and say Alhamdulillah.

you feel blessed.

optimistic.

positive.

as if nothing could go wrong.

stress is just a challenge.

a life without challenge, is absolutely boring and monotonous.

appreciate your life.

appreciate what you have.

coz life is just too short.

don't go around comparing yourself with other people.

coz what you have, they may not have. vice versa.

but we humans, tend to see what we do not have.

that is when we stop appreciating our lives.

so, it's time to start feeling good bout yourself. bout who you are. bout your life.

*just a little inspiring post for the people that i love*

*LOVES*

PSYCHED!!!!

my body is pumped with adrenaline.

i'm so so so in need for the time to fast forward to Saturday!!

i cant wait to board on that flight and see my family on Sunday night!

anyways, sorry for the late update.

i have officially finished my 2nd year.

whether i have to retake or not, thats totally up to Allah.

i have done the best i can (ok. maybe i could have started my revision earlier but being a busy bee, i couldnt)

anyways, the last paper was OK for me. i think i could atleast scrape a pass but my coursemates said that they're gonna fail that one.

i'm just gonna stay positive.

as soon as i get my exam result, i will post up a so called reflective post to reflect on my 2nd year.

but let me just say, 2nd year has been the bomb!! the best year so far since i came to UK. really. i do. i even enjoyed all those dramas i was in... NOT!

minus the dramas, it's been awesome. i love it. and i'm sad that i have to go to 3rd year = more stress with studies!!!!!!!!!

after-exam weekend was amazing. ran here n there. watched football match. spent time with friends. i can never ask for anything better than this.

i hate leaving UK coz i know i will miss good ol Manchester + the friends i have here!!!!!! sorry. sounds so attached. but how can i not?

whatever it is i wanna get my results a.s.a.p!!

so that i can stop telling myself that i wont fail when i have that gut feeling that i didnt do so well especially for Medicine Design 2. arghhh.

anyways, checklist before going back to Malaysia:

-pack

-store my effin stuff

-shopping

-hang out with friends (sex and the city 2nd round)

-Aunty Azimah's farewell

at times being heartless is the way to go.

but it's for our own good.

maybe the positive outcome is not instant.

soon. or maybe later. you'll realise.

every shit you go through is a blessing in disguise.

treat it as something that will make you stronger.

then, you will find that happiness that you've been searching for.

*LOVES*

Allahyarham Haji Abdul Malik bin Haji Arshad

time flies.

i've just finished my 2nd last paper.

Alhamdulillah it was better than i'd expected.

now i'm just waiting for the whole exam period to be totally over.

that would be about 38 hours from NOW.

_______________________________________________

on a different note, Nenek ayah's funeral went extremely well and smooth.

Alhamdulillah. and yesterday i had a long talk with my mom.

she told me a lot about Nenek ayah and his last words.

being a pious man, Nenek ayah was not afraid to die. he welcomed death with open arms. and even when he was "nazak", he could still talk and preach to my mum, her siblings and my cousins.

he said to my mum, "aku taknak satu pun dari keturunan aku membelakangkan agama Allah."

i shall remember that forever.

Insya Allah.

*LOVES*

Al- Fatihah buat arwah Nenek ayah

My grandpa on my mum's side (Haji Abdul Malik) passed away today at 90+ years old.

it was 11.30pm during Msia time.

Al-Fatihah.

Dear nenek ayah,

all i can say is.. thank you. and i love you.

i will definitely miss your endless stories about your past and Islam. you had passed on a great deal of teaching to your children and grandchildren. i will not forget. i will always remember.

hope you rest in peace now.

*LOVES*

Sex and the City 2

inspiring SATC women!!

who's who??

call me girly all you want, but I think Sex and the City 2 is a MUST WATCH for everyone!!

I think it is by far the best chick flick ever. absolutely awesome. ok there's no climax to this story, but it was just sooooooooooooooo funny!!!!!

i sat there in the cinema next to my girlfriends, and we were all howling with laughter. i had such a good time. and what a way to de-stress from exams.

i was actually suffering from brain fried. too much information at one go whilst studying for hours.

so, watching this movie was so therapeutic. however, eventhough it's rated 15 here in UK, in Malaysia it should be rated 18. or maybe 21, if there is. now, we wouldn't want people to say that because of these kinda movies is the reason why many young Malaysians have pre-marital sex and the increasing number of rape cases.

there were a few sex scenes (obviously in Malaysia kena potong) and too many sexual references. the movie was really really funny though. Samantha (the sexaholic) was by far my favourite character. ok. minus her crazy sex scenes, she was just so inspiring!

the women looked as if they aged 10 years more from the last movie.

*botox not working or just naturally aging?*

*LOVES*

WORLD CUP!

world cup is just like 2 weeks away.

i love world cup.

remember my whole family would stay up to watch the hottest men on Earth kick some ass on the field. hehehe.

drool. cristiano ronaldo. kaka. cesc fabregas. cannavaro.

damn son.

thats the hormone talking.

NIKE FOOTBALL WORLD CUP -WRITE THE FUTURE

i love this video!!!!!

bring on WORLD CUP 2010!

*LOVES*

arghhh exams.

i hate coming out of the exams and people start discussing bout it.

then made me realise owh shit. why didnt i write that down.

and makes me wonder if i wrote enough points or not.

arghh. just finished medicine design 2.

please God, let me pass this one with flying colours.

or atleast, a pass would be sufficient.

on a lighter note, yayyyyy!! 2 more papers to go!!!!!

Physio. Med Chem. deadly.

*LOVES*

Lets flush the papers down the toilet

FORENSIC SCIENCE - DONE

- ACE IT?????? i don't know.

SOCIAL PHARMACY - DONE

- ACE IT?????? i don't know.

seriously, i love love love what i'm learning in my 2nd year. revising is not stressful because i absolutely enjoy what i am learning. but it annoys me how uni is not like A levels and SPM. seriously i'm not expecting the lecturers to give us hints on what's coming out, but more of like guidance as to how much we have to write e.g how many marks does one main point worth?

that kinda thing.

lesson to learn for 3rd year: do more additional readings and revise throughout the semester.

Social Pharmacy was supposed to be the easiest but it turned out to be ... hmm.. very distracting. til you can't think. like seriously. online exam in the computer suite. as soon as the exam started everyone started to type on the keyboard like annoyingly loud. at times when i need to close my eyes to think, all i could hear was typing noises. lol. but i managed to finish everything in time. as to whether i did well, God knows. all i know is that i don't want to resit please.

next up:

MEDICINE DESIGN 2

PHYSIOLOGY 2

MEDICINAL CHEMISTRY

3rd June. bye bye 2nd year. and i can just pray that I will not have any resits.

*LOVES*

2 weeks... 3 weeks....

okies.

less than 2 weeks from now..

2nd year will finally be over. yay!!

bout 3 weeks from now...

i'll be at home with my loved ones. yayyyyyy!!!!

exam revision has been OK. i just wanna get all the exams over and done with now.

i will always have the feeling of not being ready, but hey... it's always like that.

no matter how much revision i do, that feeling will never go away. so lets get it done FAST!

after exams. it'll be awesome. fun time. i'm counting the days from now.

10 days.

oooohh.. SEX AND THE CITY 2 IS COMING OUT THIS FRIDAY.

gonna take a break from revision and head out to the cinema with the girls!

*LOVES*

Misunderstood

some of my friends thought i'm not ok when they read the blog post.

i'm perfectly fine, people!!!

no worries! =) details later aite?

i've been busy with study study study.

and i can't wait to go back to Malaysia in like A MONTH'S TIME!!! yeayyyyyyyyy!!!

ooooh... and i just got an email from SELANGOR MEDICAL CENTRE!!!

i will be doing A MONTH'S PHARMACY INTERNSHIP THERE!!!

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!

AND.. AND.. AND.. they allow me to choose the date to start the internship.

calling out to all MY LOVERS FROM SJ (YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE),

WE HAVE YET TO DECIDE ON THE DATE OF OUR LANGKAWI TRIP.

LET ME KNOW.

I HAVE BEEN LOOKING for CHEAP FLIGHTS. HEHEHE.

RM200+ to and fro. and hotel. hmm.. that can be settled later.

i just need the date please (i know somewhere mid July).

and i was thinking of 3 days 2 nights.

but 4 days 3 nights would be perfect.

ooohh... and then i will be going to Krabi with my family end of July.

omg. we're sooooooo gonna kacau Ratih's honeymoon.

yes, they're goin to Krabi for honeymoon.

and no.. we didn't plan to kacau her and Haimi.

but she insisted on us coming coz she thinks island hopping would be fun in a group.

yeayyyyyyyyyyyyy!

so from what i see, i think best if i start my internship as soon as i arrive. no?

or maybe a week later.hmmmm.....

DECISIONS! HELP ME!

*LOVES*

When things go wrong

i believe in fate.

sometimes, when things do not go the way i or someone else wants it to be, there must be a reason why.

and believe me, every dark cloud has a silver lining.

i had been in the shittiest state one can ever be, but that taught me to be the better person that i am today.

shit happens.

not coz i want it, but coz God has a better plan for me.

if you're reading this, i'm sure God has a better plan for you.

a better match for you.

i know i'm not. and i can never be.

but i thank you for being wonderful to me. really.

i appreciate it.

*LOVES*