....and he still makes my heart skip a beat.
Happy Anniversary babe.
Friday, August 21, 2009
Monday, August 17, 2009
the power of your words
I've been noticing lately that one of my son's words have been real strong and a little on the unkind side. I knew that I needed to talk to my son about his words, but today something finally came out of his mouth (and my other son's mouth) that made me cringe. This afternoon got a little crazy and all the kids were loud and not listening. After a few scuffles it went too far......
One son yelled to the other son, "I HATE YOU!"
and the other son yelled back, "I hate you MORE!!"
I did my best to stay calm.
I FORCED all my kids to come and sit in my bedroom and be quiet. I then explained to them that because of the way they had acted that the spirit had left our home. I also explained that our home should be a place that we want to be and a place where we feel safe and loved and that I didn't feel like that right now. So I decided we'd read scriptures so that the holy ghost could come back and be with us.
After scriptures I excused all the kids except the one I needed to have a chat with.
I started our little talk by telling him how powerful his words were. That his words could make someone feel loved and special and happy or they could make someone feel sad and embarrassed and really hurt their feelings.
Then I told him this story...
Growing up there was one particular girl that always treated me badly. She hurt my feelings with her words. She made fun of me.
When we were in junior high there was a girl in our PE class that was Russian. She was quiet. None of her clothes were cute. You could tell that her family was not well off.
One day while we were changing out of our PE clothes the 'not so nice girl' noticed that this poor Russian girl had holes in her underwear. She made fun of her. She said "Oh my gosh, she is so poor that she has holes in her underwear!!" Of course some of the girls laughed at her. I remember being so angry. So angry. But I kept my mouth shut. There are so many things I could have said to make her stop.
As I was telling my son this story I started to cry. That poor girl. I'm so sorry I didn't say something. I don't know why I didn't say something. Maybe I was afraid that she'd start to make fun of me too.
I told him that I hoped he would realize what his words meant to others and that he would always try to make others feel good and that he would never let someone make fun of someone else without saying something because I still feel badly that I never said anything. I haven't thought of that in years, but it made me cry.
Of course we've all had experiences where we have been hurt by words or we've hurt someone else. I am self conscious about my nose because of a comment that was made to me in high school. Silly, I know but words are powerful. I just pray that unkind words will never come from me or one of my kids.
One son yelled to the other son, "I HATE YOU!"
and the other son yelled back, "I hate you MORE!!"
I did my best to stay calm.
I FORCED all my kids to come and sit in my bedroom and be quiet. I then explained to them that because of the way they had acted that the spirit had left our home. I also explained that our home should be a place that we want to be and a place where we feel safe and loved and that I didn't feel like that right now. So I decided we'd read scriptures so that the holy ghost could come back and be with us.
After scriptures I excused all the kids except the one I needed to have a chat with.
I started our little talk by telling him how powerful his words were. That his words could make someone feel loved and special and happy or they could make someone feel sad and embarrassed and really hurt their feelings.
Then I told him this story...
Growing up there was one particular girl that always treated me badly. She hurt my feelings with her words. She made fun of me.
When we were in junior high there was a girl in our PE class that was Russian. She was quiet. None of her clothes were cute. You could tell that her family was not well off.
One day while we were changing out of our PE clothes the 'not so nice girl' noticed that this poor Russian girl had holes in her underwear. She made fun of her. She said "Oh my gosh, she is so poor that she has holes in her underwear!!" Of course some of the girls laughed at her. I remember being so angry. So angry. But I kept my mouth shut. There are so many things I could have said to make her stop.
As I was telling my son this story I started to cry. That poor girl. I'm so sorry I didn't say something. I don't know why I didn't say something. Maybe I was afraid that she'd start to make fun of me too.
I told him that I hoped he would realize what his words meant to others and that he would always try to make others feel good and that he would never let someone make fun of someone else without saying something because I still feel badly that I never said anything. I haven't thought of that in years, but it made me cry.
Of course we've all had experiences where we have been hurt by words or we've hurt someone else. I am self conscious about my nose because of a comment that was made to me in high school. Silly, I know but words are powerful. I just pray that unkind words will never come from me or one of my kids.
Saturday, August 8, 2009
Utah Summer Games June 18-20, 2009
We went to Cedar City, Utah for the Utah Summer games. Jared played basketball with my brothers Ike and Dan and Behka's husband Rob and two other guys and my Dad kinda coached, and the kids ran around. We got into Cedar City right as the game was starting and then had a bit of a problem finding the way to the gym. I think we missed the first half or first quarter. 
That night there was a hoop shoot for the adults. None of the guys wanted to do it, but there was no chance Behka and I were going to miss a chance to shoot:). We did freethrows, 3 pointers and hot shot.
o find out if we won or not because it was already late and we needed to feed a million kids and get in bed. As we are leaving the gym,I think it was Ike, asked my dad, "dad, how old is Jess?" My dad wouldn't look him in the eyes...and he replied "29.". Then he confessed that he knew I was 30, but he couldn't have his only two daughters compete against each other. I can't remember what all the age groups were, but Behka and I both should have been in the 30-35 age group. I didn't even notice because my dad is the one that signed us up!! Very sneaky. We got a good laugh about that. Then an even bigger laugh the next day when we went back to the gym and found out that we had both taken gold in all 3 contests. Then it wasn't quite as exciting when they told us that there was only 2 women in each of our age groups. 2. So, we both beat 1 lady. Hilarious. AND the poor women in my age group should have gotten all GOLD instead of silver.
e guys game on Friday morning got cancelled because the other team ended up not coming. So there was an empty court. We took full advantage. We had races and dribbling games and attempted to teach Hailey how to do a lay-up. 
We've got some fast kidders.
Behka, Jackie and I played volleyball with Jackies neice and two of Behka's friends from her ward, Savannah and Maxine. We had so much fun. We ended up barely getting into the gold medal tournament and then won a few and lost a few and didn't place. It was still so much fun.
This is Jackie my SIL, #24.
Behka serving.
The Utah Summer Games were so fun! Pretty soon it will be our kids playing instead of us!
That night there was a hoop shoot for the adults. None of the guys wanted to do it, but there was no chance Behka and I were going to miss a chance to shoot:). We did freethrows, 3 pointers and hot shot.
o find out if we won or not because it was already late and we needed to feed a million kids and get in bed. As we are leaving the gym,I think it was Ike, asked my dad, "dad, how old is Jess?" My dad wouldn't look him in the eyes...and he replied "29.". Then he confessed that he knew I was 30, but he couldn't have his only two daughters compete against each other. I can't remember what all the age groups were, but Behka and I both should have been in the 30-35 age group. I didn't even notice because my dad is the one that signed us up!! Very sneaky. We got a good laugh about that. Then an even bigger laugh the next day when we went back to the gym and found out that we had both taken gold in all 3 contests. Then it wasn't quite as exciting when they told us that there was only 2 women in each of our age groups. 2. So, we both beat 1 lady. Hilarious. AND the poor women in my age group should have gotten all GOLD instead of silver.
e guys game on Friday morning got cancelled because the other team ended up not coming. So there was an empty court. We took full advantage. We had races and dribbling games and attempted to teach Hailey how to do a lay-up. 
We've got some fast kidders.
Behka, Jackie and I played volleyball with Jackies neice and two of Behka's friends from her ward, Savannah and Maxine. We had so much fun. We ended up barely getting into the gold medal tournament and then won a few and lost a few and didn't place. It was still so much fun.
This is Jackie my SIL, #24.
Behka serving.
The Utah Summer Games were so fun! Pretty soon it will be our kids playing instead of us!
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