We made it to another milestone yesterday. It was day 120, or in other words 4 months since Willy's tumor was detected. Now we're on our way to our next milestone, 1 day in and counting. He's already beat the 80 days by 21. He is doing so well. His hair is growing back at a pretty good pace. I'll be glad when it is back. I'd say it's about 1/3 of the way there, maybe a little more.
This morning, I spent some time tossing out some of his toys that have seen better days and kept his favorites. Of course, that sparked some interest in what was put back in the box. He has a mat for scratching that he used to lay on all of the time. He hasn't been interested in it for months. I sat down with a brush and got all of the cat hair off of it. and noticed a zipper on the back. I unzipped it and pulled out a bag of catnip, one I'm assuming has lost it's zip - therefore, the loss of interest in the mat.
I got up to go get some catnip to refresh it, and came back to find him lying on the mat, (curiosity & cat... what can you say?) I got out my camera to take a few photos. I changed it to record when he started chasing his tail. I've always wanted a video of him chasing his tail, but never could seem to get one. So, catching that on tape made me happy. I'll try to get it uploaded soon.
Thanking God every day for the fact that Willy is doing so well. Believing for many more of those good days.
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Saturday, June 12, 2010
In public? Seriously?
If I EVER somehow go out of my house and to the store with my dark unmentionables showing through my thin pajama pants that have a big split running down the back, PLEASE tell me and don't just laugh and blog about it while you're standing in the checkout line behind me.
Monday, June 7, 2010
Perfect
Beautiful weather, a screened in back porch, Chris relaxing reading a book, me and Willy on the porch swing... Yep, perfect.
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Triggers
Yesterday afternoon, I came home from work to check on Willy. I ended up taking him back to the office with me. I wanted to weigh him. Eight days before, I had taken him to the vet for a weight check, and he was 12.5 lbs. Yesterday, he weighed in at 12.5 lbs. I'm so happy that he is maintaining his weight!
He's still eating well, sleeping well, playing, socializing, being affectionate. By all outward appearances, he looks great. I think he is doing great. We're on day 111 now. I love watching that number go higher. Things are going well. I'm really encouraged. I think the ES Clear is helping a lot.
But, my emotions are still raw underneath the surface, waiting for a trigger. Last night, I encountered one of those triggers and I couldn't cap the emotions. We were at the dinner table, and Chris said something that caught me off guard, something about Willy's future. I almost choked on the bite of food in my mouth, I couldn't get it down. I tried to hold back the tears, but I couldn't. It wasn't anything he said that I hadn't already thought about myself, so the content of his comment wasn't what upset me. I think it was that I was caught off guard, there was no prep for the statement. I couldn't stay at the table.
Willy was in his customary place next to me. I pull a chair over next to me and feed him small bites of people food as he sits there and waits. (most of the time, patiently, and others, well, not so much) Always have and will continue to do so as long as I can. I got up and headed toward the bedroom, grabbing a tissue as I went. All I wanted was to curl up and cry. I kept going, the walk in closet was dark, I went it and sat on the floor and just sobbed. I couldn't stop it.
I was only there a minute when Willy came to join me. He actually got up and left the table with food still sitting on a plate. He has always had an instinct for my feelings. He was very adamant about loving on me. He was purring very loudly and pacing back and forth. I kept crying. I didn't want to upset him, but I couldn't stop it.
Chris came back to check on me, he said "I'm sorry Blondie". I couldn't even convey to him that I wasn't upset with him, or even what he said. He'd never seen me like that, hiding in the dark on the floor in the closet, bawling my eyes out. I've never seen me like that. I was trying to will myself to stop crying. It wasn't working.
Finally after about 20 minutes, the tears let up some. My phone rang. Chris had brought it to me when he came to check on me. A diversion, a welcome diversion. It was a dear friend of mine who has been sick. He is back in the hospital. He wanted to know if I was okay, all I could say was that I was sad, so sad. But the diversion worked. I stopped crying. After we got off the phone. I went and laid on the bed, picked up a book and started reading. I was already about 2/3 of the way finished with the book, so it worked pretty well as a diversion too.
Chris came in to check on me again, and curled up behind me. And we talked for a long time. I enjoyed lying there with him, putting things in perspective. Assuring him that I wasn't upset with him. Willy came to join us.
All was right with my world at that moment in time, lying there with the man I love, and the cat I love. And, best of all, they love me back.
He's still eating well, sleeping well, playing, socializing, being affectionate. By all outward appearances, he looks great. I think he is doing great. We're on day 111 now. I love watching that number go higher. Things are going well. I'm really encouraged. I think the ES Clear is helping a lot.
But, my emotions are still raw underneath the surface, waiting for a trigger. Last night, I encountered one of those triggers and I couldn't cap the emotions. We were at the dinner table, and Chris said something that caught me off guard, something about Willy's future. I almost choked on the bite of food in my mouth, I couldn't get it down. I tried to hold back the tears, but I couldn't. It wasn't anything he said that I hadn't already thought about myself, so the content of his comment wasn't what upset me. I think it was that I was caught off guard, there was no prep for the statement. I couldn't stay at the table.
Willy was in his customary place next to me. I pull a chair over next to me and feed him small bites of people food as he sits there and waits. (most of the time, patiently, and others, well, not so much) Always have and will continue to do so as long as I can. I got up and headed toward the bedroom, grabbing a tissue as I went. All I wanted was to curl up and cry. I kept going, the walk in closet was dark, I went it and sat on the floor and just sobbed. I couldn't stop it.
I was only there a minute when Willy came to join me. He actually got up and left the table with food still sitting on a plate. He has always had an instinct for my feelings. He was very adamant about loving on me. He was purring very loudly and pacing back and forth. I kept crying. I didn't want to upset him, but I couldn't stop it.
Chris came back to check on me, he said "I'm sorry Blondie". I couldn't even convey to him that I wasn't upset with him, or even what he said. He'd never seen me like that, hiding in the dark on the floor in the closet, bawling my eyes out. I've never seen me like that. I was trying to will myself to stop crying. It wasn't working.
Finally after about 20 minutes, the tears let up some. My phone rang. Chris had brought it to me when he came to check on me. A diversion, a welcome diversion. It was a dear friend of mine who has been sick. He is back in the hospital. He wanted to know if I was okay, all I could say was that I was sad, so sad. But the diversion worked. I stopped crying. After we got off the phone. I went and laid on the bed, picked up a book and started reading. I was already about 2/3 of the way finished with the book, so it worked pretty well as a diversion too.
Chris came in to check on me again, and curled up behind me. And we talked for a long time. I enjoyed lying there with him, putting things in perspective. Assuring him that I wasn't upset with him. Willy came to join us.
All was right with my world at that moment in time, lying there with the man I love, and the cat I love. And, best of all, they love me back.
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