I sent a boy to Basic Combat Training and in his stead a full-fledged man will return. He has grown and changed so much. His letters attest to the evolution that has taken place to transform him from the former to the latter.
I must admit that as excited as I am to see him, I am somewhat nervous, as well. Although my heart tells me he is my son and our bond is stronger than any amount of distance could destroy, my head tells me he will not be the same person and there is some anxiety about reaquainting myself with him as the new man.
In my wildest imagination, I could never have guessed that I would find these last few weeks to be harder than the first. I suspect initially I was in shock or denial, but as reality set in, I found myself reclusive and depressed, clinging to each letter from him as if it were the last shred of his essence I would encounter. That has given way to fluctuating emotions; a full spectrum of feelings from anger, sorrow, grief, excitement, joy, trepidation, pride, and always, always love.
We are in the home stretch now and barring any injuries or illness, he will graduate and come home very soon. I expect a call in two weeks and am so anticipating hearing his voice and being able to actually speak with him for the first time since June.
I plan to give him a welcome home that is fit for a soldier returning from war. Banners, signs, smiles, hugs, kisses, and love, lots of love!
