A thing of the past?

I want to let my friends and family know I have decided to go private....for good. Recently I have been considering not blogging all together but I might get in the swing of it once again I'm just not sure how soon...maybe tomorrow? I'm just not sure. I journal on google docs and have lost interest in blogging lately but I still love keeping up with all of you!
Thank you for your blogging efforts :)
If you would like to check back here now and then leave your email in a comment so I can invite you. I will be going private pronto! Chances are I have many of your emails but please leave it anyway.
I love you all...lots and lots!

Belated Hallows Eve

This is just what I do. I'm late… for almost everything. I'm not posting it here on this public blog because it's something I'm proud of, because I certainly am not. I do recognize it as a fault and am constantly trying to conquer my punctual problems. Dan loves me just the same although I'm sure he has blown a blood vessel waiting on me one or two times.

I guess activities didn't just fall on "Hallows Eve" it was more like a three day celebration. I've noticed that is the case with most Holidays these days. We celebrate for a week!

I don't like the feeling of my bones freezing but I do enjoy the beautiful things Fall brings. Brings awesomeness for all five senses.

We dressed up and headed out to the traditional ward party. Yippee! Sweaty, award winning, game playing, cake walking ward party. We won two years in a row. Yes yes ya'll! This year we didn't just get a card stock paper award though…we scored a pixie stick! This year we won most creative.





 Zealand was so laid back about the whole thing. He sported the pillow batting stuffed bag, leggings, and a money covered hat without one single tear.

 We dressed up again for a costume contest at my work. (no such luck for this costume contest, we didn't even place)

Jumped our heads off at Cornbelly's Corn Maze. (love the huge pillow and so did Z)

Then off to another Halloween party down to my sisters and then trick or treating and candy eating with cousins. 
Zealand was so amazed to see so much candy all in one place.  It was a knock down drag out war to try and contain his candy eating. One of the battles I choose. But having a little one makes the Holidays that much sweeter! (no pun) Seeing the world through a child's eyes is the best way to live and I get to do that everyday!

I was so halloweened out come Sunday. Lucky me, that is all my primary kids wanted to talk about oh and they were disappointed that I didn't bring treats! for the love! 

Thanksgiving is just around the corner. I can almost smell the stuffing and homemade rolls.

If only...

If only grocery stores would implement this nifty grocery cart...then maybe grocery shopping would move from my "to do list" to my "GET to do list"....But maybe they should do long boards since I am a fool on skateboards.

Giving a man a fish feeds him for one meal. Teaching a man to fish feeds him for a lifetime.

After receiving a call early Wednesday morning about the passing of a friend my mind went spinning with thoughts: His poor daughter and family. What must all of them be going through? Memories of junior high and high school with this friend and then of course the question? Is this real, it doesn't seem real, but then the realization that so many have gone before him from the same cause of death that I suddenly wasn't surprised. I turned over thoughts of this individual and his family in my head all day and then it eventually led me to think of my own family. Fear crept in. If my generation is the generation of drugs, what will my own children surely face? I worry about this type of thing a lot. I think of all that I faced when I was a teenager and it makes my heart just hurt to think that my own children will have to face the same things and even worse. When I start to worry I start repeating "Fear is the opposite of faith" rapid fire in my mind. Then this leads me to remember the promises from Prophets and Apostles. The promises if we are diligent in keeping and teaching the fundamental principles of the gospel in our home that our families will have protection. Even though I have only one child I am already a firm believer in starting to plant tiny feet firmly in gospel truths at a very young age. Every morning Zealand knows that first thing when he wakes up he is going to have his sippy of juice and at least 3 verses out of the scriptures. He knows that we fold our arms and pray before each meal, although he is not yet able to wait to eat his food before we have finished the prayer (he usually digs in half way through). He knows that after stories each night that him, daddy, and I will kneel around the coffee table and have prayer. I often talk about the Savior and my love for him and tell Zealand that I know he lived with Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ before he came to Daddy and I and that he is a special child of God and that he has a great purpose. I can't wait until he understands. I can't wait for him to find out for himself and find and develop his own testimony. I know that Zealand and all future children that I bare will face trials, adversity, heart breaks, make mistakes, all of which is part of agency, life, and our purpose here but I have faith and know that after all I can do and if I live up to my part of the promise the grace of God will protect my children, my family, and we will be together in the eternities.
So happy to know what I know and be a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.
Read this. It is really really great.

beauty

 10.07.10
Stewart falls in the summer? mmmmm meh? It's nice.
Stewart falls on this particular crisp fall October morning? I couldn't think of any place I'd rather be.
Zealand and I go on a lot of hikes but this one stands out as thee hike of the year so far.
It was perfectly perfect! The only way it could have possibly been more perfectly perfect is if Dan could have come.
Z and I were the only ones on the trail. Everything was so still and silent. The only sound was my feet stomping the trail. When we stopped you could hear the leaves falling to the forest floor and the breeze through the trees. Zealand had his head laid on my back and was completely still. In awe of the beauty I would like to think. (since this kid is never quiet or still) We were both in awe of God's creations, in awe of the beauty created by the artist of all artists.
Once we were to the falls Z broke his silence. He was stoked about the water blasting out of the mountain and had plenty to say about that. We shared an apple, had a little rest then started the trek back.
I'm completely comfortable and content with my point and shoot camera and my photography skills (NONE) except when I am surrounded by the beauty that I was then I wish I had the fanciest camera on the market and years of photography classes.   No justice. But I snapped away anyhow.

Inquiring

Well Zealand is going into nursery this Sunday! I can't fathom it. How my baby is going into NURSERY! NURSERY I SAY! Next thing you know it will be a Wednesday 18 years down the road and we will be sending him off into the MTC! (if our best efforts succeed)
I'm sure he is going to love it.
So it is also that time where we are starting to think about potty training. This being my first child I have no idea where to begin. That is where I call for your opinions, advice, books, methods; anything you've got that might point us in the right direction with this new adventure!!!!
Inquiry number 2
Genealogy? Family History? My family search? I am just dipping into this. My Dad's side since no one has done any family history on that side or Temple Work as far as I'm concerned. That whole side is Catholic and I think I might have bit off more than I can chew. I am drowning in papers and have no idea where to begin. So again…Advice? Anyone?
Thank you thank you!

Sock Lint

So this doesn't really have to do with the title of this post but this is the preface. Zealand and I go to Lap/Story time at the Orem Library every Wednesday morning and then to play in the park behind the library. Today Zealand paid no attention to story time. See from birth we have sort of tried to teach Zealand to be a lover. Hugs, snuggling, kisses, blowing kisses, gentle w/babies, sharing, etc. etc. You know the opposite of pushing, shoving, stealing toys from other children kind of kid. Well today was proof that he's learning to be a "lover".

Maybe too much of a lover?

There was a huge crowd of children at story time today and Zealand was thrilled. He was walking around trying to hold other kids hands and then he found two little girls that he just couldn't seem to leave alone. He kept wrapping his arms around them and laying his head on their shoulders. Then he would hold their hand and lead them to the book shelf where he would pick books off the shelves and hand them to the girls. Apparently it was all too fast for them because they were not too receptive to his gentlemanly gestures. But he persisted anyhow, until I had to physically remove him from the area they were in. Then he found another little boy that was much more welcoming and they sat at a table together and stared at each other for a while, ran over to the big picture window, gave it a few pounds, and let out a couple war cries (which I'm sure everyone in the library appreciated).

Okay now for my favorite part…

On the drive home I looked in the review mirror but could only see Zealand's face. His mouth was moving in the motions of chewing. I immediately turned around because I had taken his treats from him so I couldn't figure out what he must be eating. Then I laughed hysterically at what I saw; Zealand with his foot bent clear up to his face where he was carefully examining his sock, plucking lint from it and eating it. Yep, Zealand's afternoon snack: Gray sock lint. Tasty. I halfheartedly told him no, then just turned around and watched him do it the whole way home from the review mirror. Because after all he is a boy (I'm sure there are lots worse things he could and probably will eat) and it made me laugh really hard.

I'm sure this is mostly accurate

Monday, 9:00am


Good Morning!

This perfectly delightful note is being sent on paper I made

myself to tell you what I have been up to. Since it snowed last

night, I got up early and made a sled with old barn wood and a

glue gun. I hand-painted it in gold leaf, got out my loom, and

made a blanket in peaches and mauves. Then to make the sled

complete, I made a white horse to pull it from DNA that I just

had sitting around in my craft room.



By then, it was time to start making the place mats and napkins

for my 20 breakfast guests. I'm serving the old standard Stewart

twelve-course breakfast, but I'll let you in on a little secret?

I didn't have time to make the table and chairs this morning,

so I used the ones I had on hand.



Before I moved the table into the dining room, I decided to add

just a touch of the holidays. So, I repainted the room in pinks

and stenciled gold stars on the ceiling. Then, while the homemade

bread was rising, I took antique candle molds and made the dishes

(exactly the same shade of pink) to use for breakfast. These were

made from Hungarian clay, which you can get in almost any Hungarian

craft store.



Well, I must run. I need to finish the buttonholes on the dress

I'm wearing for breakfast. I'll get out the sled and drive this

note to the post office as soon as the glue dries on the envelope

I'll be making. Hope my breakfast guests don't stay too long?

I have 40,000 cranberries to string with bay leaves before my

speaking engagement at noon.



Love,

Martha Stewart



P.S. When I made the ribbon for this typewriter, I used 1/8 inch

gold gauze. I soaked the gauze in a mixture of white grapes and

blackberries which I grew, picked, and crushed last week just for

fun!!


-Sadly enough, somedays I'm sure most of us feel like we could be the author of a letter very similar to this.

pictures and babble

Saturday morning hike

Timpanogas Cave hike

having a break and snack before we went into the caves

are we there yet?

This is what Zealand thought of the Caves

First day of Autumn date night w/this handsome dude

Dinner at our favorite place

...and Sundance Moon Lit rides. Romantic.

General Relief Society Meeting with Sister-in-law, Motherin-in-law, Mother and good friends. Awesome. Late night Saturday grocery shopping, and then relaxing the rest of the weekend. sort of.

Cousins

First Day of Autumn Celebration!

Here's what's on the menu….

• Maple Orange Cider
• Harvest Chowder w/buttermilk corn bread
• Apple Crisp w/homemade ice cream

Except the celebration meal will be postponed until Sunday.
Dan and I have a fancy little date planned for the first evening of fall.
It's a surprise so I can't post about it until later.

Happy Fall friends!

What a s'more.

So remember how last year for Halloween we were a s'more. I the hershey kiss, Dan the graham cracker, and Zealand the puffy white marshmallow? I dreamed that costume up when I was about 5 months pregnant. I could hardly wait for Halloween to roll around so my dreams could materialize. Dan couldn't make it to the one party we went to so I ended up making a graham cracker out of a piece of cardboard and tying it to my back then I carried the lil' marshmallow around and we actually won "Most Creative" at the ward party! How EXCITING! hehe
Well Halloween has rolled around quickly once again...what to be? what to be?
I'm going to go eat some candy corn while I think about.

the one marshmallow i can't resist!

Partying when I should be sleeping

Today is day number 18 of being sick. I can't hear. I can't smell. I can hardly talk. Whatever I have caught is hanging onto me like I am the last person it is going to infect! Unfortunately but always Zealand caught this mean virus. He didn't know what to cry louder over: his two teeth that are making his gums swell to the size of gum balls, that he can't breathe, or that his nose is raw and bloody from being wiped every 30 seconds.
Zealand and I went to the doctor last Wednesday. The doctor quickly looked up my nose, in my ears, and at my throat and after looking at each of those he made a little sound like "hmm" or "ah ha". Funny, and what he had to tell me afterwards was even funnier. Double ear infection, bronchitis, and a sinus infection. WHHHHHHHHHat? That is just hilarious. No wonder I can't breathe and it feels like my head is going to explode. Every nook that can be stuffed is stuffed with mucus infected junk; every tube down to my chest is congested. I think Zealand has mostly kicked his sickness. Thank goodness!
I was thinking on the way home from the Doc? Is it fair?? Is it fair that I eat whole wheat, flaxseed, super food, fruit and veggies, drink the ocean all the daylong and seem to be the one to always get sick and Dan eats burgers , Dr peppers, and fudge striped cookies?
Lack of sleep maybe? It's probably my own darn fault. I had family come in from Washington, Texas, and Logan over Labor Day weekend and although my body was screaming for rest I was high tailing it from dawn until dusk. Cooking, baking, Birthday celebrations, bbqs, wii tournaments, motorcycle rides, eating out, watching cute cousins meet and play for the first time, Whoopie Pie eating, and some good old fashioned chats of "Remember When?" which is always my favorite. I'm going to have to say it was all well worth it. I miss my brother and his girls so much already! Come back soon!
Being sick is miserable. It turns me completely lackluster. And as a highly active individual that takes a lot! So I am thankful for my otherwise healthy body. I was beginning to become depressed. When I can't keep up my normal pace it gets me down. I was thinking what if my body was in some way impaired and I wasn't able to wake up in the morning make breakfast, get Zealand up and ready, go on my run, do the laundry, play with Zealand and on and on. Oh I can't even bear the thought. So if one good thing has come from being sick it has given me a little reminder of how blessed I am to have such a capable, healthy, body. That and maybe to listen more to my body when it is trying to tell me it needs rest.


P.s. Have you ever had a Whoopie Pie? It is my favorite treat that my Mom made growing up. She made the classic chocolate. But this weekend I tossed it up a bit and made the classic chocolate, vanilla whoopie with coconut cream filling and a vanilla whoopie with strawberry cream filling. RICH! I also found out that there is entire cook books dedicated to whoopies! Bakerella posted about one of those cook books. My fridge is actually stocked with them right now, I tend to make things in too large of quantities, half of them will end up in the trash. What a shame. Wasting is a pet peeve.

Lately I’ve been thinking…

            That if I could afford to hire help for one household task, it would hands down be  LAUNDRY!  I  can't even imagine what I would do with all the time that would free up.

About balance and prioritizing. Putting first things first. Thinking of this quote "When we put God first, all other things fall into their proper place or drop out of our lives. Our love of the Lord will govern the claims for our affection, the demands on our time, the interests we pursue, and the order of our priorities."

About purchasing the cart I have been stocking up on Urban Outfitters for months now. Does anyone else do that? Go surf a clothing website, add things to your cart but can never actually bring yourself to actually purchase the items? Wishful thinking that's what that is.

 That I really like the saying "Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shoveling the sidewalk before it stops snowing"

 That I truly am blessed to have such a good friend in my husband, I know there is way too many tears being shed in broken and betrayed marriages in this world. The other day on the last leg of my run this thought hit me "What are you thinking Sarah?" "be grateful for that husband you have!" I could probably give him lots more kisses, lots more attention, a few more shoulder rubs and complain about one less dish he doesn't put in the dish washer.

 About how blessed I am to have so many awesome examples to follow in my life

 About how I am not as sad as I thought I would be to see summer go. Fall is beautiful and the smells of fall I love. If only it could last a little longer. I can't stand the sight of naked, dead, grey trees.

 That I want to go sun-kissed blonde. Yep you read that right. I know! That is probably the craziest thing of all the things I have been thinking.

 That I need to make a key lime pie, visit one more snow cone shack, one more outdoor pool, go on one more camping trip, at least two more hikes, and make some jam to last the winter before summer is over! oh and walk around barefoot outside as much as possible until that first leaf falls!

 That I should never have been so judgmental to those who get boob jobs! Sorry if you're reading this. I have a whole new view of it now that I have breast fed one child. I can only imagine what I will be thinking after 5 more kids. I can only imagine what my husband will be thinking. Probably the same thing I will be thinking of his muffin top. (Just kidding Dan..lovvvve you)

 And do you want to know what I think every single second of the day….

How stinking cute this lil'dude is!

And how I love him so much I want to scream it from the mountain tops!

This is a perfect capture of his mood that day.

Breakdown

After an exhausting but fun trip to Colorado I had a breakdown Monday night.
I attribute it to mostly a lack of sleep
Zealand wasn't a very happy camper on our vacation and did a lot of crying and other non sense mischief.
This sort of got to me. But He also was doing some biting and hitting and tantrum throwing that came out of nowhere. Which I also attribute to a lack of sleep for the poor little fellar.
But it REALLY got to me.
After getting home Monday evening and thinking there might be some relief, Zealand dumped my giant bottle of olive oil on the kitchen floor and a bottle of shampoo onto the carpet. That was the last straw.
So I sat in the bathroom and cried for a long, long time. Asking myself silly questions like what I had done wrong as a Mother since Zealand was into a biting and hitting thing.
Also questioning whether I would be able to handle anymore children.
I was completely on empty.
Had I had enough sleep it probably wouldn't have seemed that the world was crashing down around me or more like my wild baby boy was tearing the world apart around me.
But I hadn't had enough sleep and I just cried and cried.
Thank goodness for a very good friend of mine, my husband, who swooped in and cleaned, did laundry, sent me to BYU Education Week and took care of Zealand.
I was quickly refilled and refreshed and back to my normal self.
I am also very happy that little Zealand is back to his normal self as well. He was so happy to be home and play with his toys and sleep in his very own bed.
He has been taking really long naps since we have been home. Recovering.
"sigh" of relief!
I am all for spontaneity or should I say I used to be. When raising children it's a different story. Following and keeping on a schedule leads to peace, bliss, and order for this family!

Colorado Charm

long drive.friendly faces.super cool hosts.had best sandwich ever had ever.charm, charm, charm everywhere, everywhere.driving.walking.sight seeing.candy.walking.cousins playing.driving.50 cent cones.no sleep.swim.all in all a good vacation minus Zealand's tantrum shinnanigans. Who knew Colorado was so charming? Not I. But I will definitely go back.  all photos thanks to these snazzy photographers

Going out in style…

2^nd post of the day…let's hear it….woot woot
Summer is wrapping up…
Our August is filled to the brim with summer activities.
Seemingly so from the looks of my deserted blog, blogging hasn't hit the to do list in quite some time
August weekend 1= camping
August weekend 2= zoo, bbq, and wedding
August weekend 3= Colorado
And all the days in between are filled with fruit picking, meal making with the harvest treats, dipping in the pool, and soaking up the last bits of sunshine.
I will be posting plenty of pictures to tell of those tales. Coming soon to this very barren blog.
I mentioned to Dan he better find a warm sunny place to relocate our family of three pronto. I can hardly bear the thoughts of cold winter months; running circles on a bland colored indoor track, having to tell little Z it's too cold to play outside, colds, and lifeless vegetation.

The Power of Example

I never really knew the power of example until I had a child of my own.
I never really knew the power of example until I had a child running around the house mirroring everything I do.
Literally EVERYTHING, as well as giving his best shot at saying everything we say.
This is one of the many ways being a Mother makes me want to continually better myself.
Z is a little sponge discovering his surroundings and soaking up every drop he finds.
As I go about my day with my lil man at my side I am aware of his eyes studying my every move
Then when he is going about his business he often looks up to my face to see my expression or to see my reaction to something he has done.
AS I have suddenly and quickly become more aware of how impressionable children are the same thoughts keep turning over in my head.
What do I want him to mirror the most? What do I want him to learn through my example? What things might I do better?

Cream of the Crop

Zealand caught on quick! and I mean QUICK! Tuesday night I went out for the first time of the season to pick some luscious raspberries.  I took Zealand out with me to play while I picked. He started playing in the sand box and I started making my way down the rows. I had just been through one bush, I was bent over getting to the bottom of the next with the bucket at my feet when this little hand popped through from the back between my feet and dropped a plump red berry in the bucket.  I melted.  I turned around and promptly smothered him in kisses and asked for at least 5 high fives for being his faithful adorable, smarty pants self.  He helped me finish off the row in this same way; following close behind and dropping berries in the bucket between my feet. I was surprised that he even chose the most plump, ripe ones for the picking.  and after all that work he of course had to get a refreshing drink from the hose. ahhhhh! The sippy cup has just not been the same since he learned this trick.  We are off for some camping this weekend!  sayonara

15 months

Zealand really is closer to a little rascally boy than toddler
All at once he decides that he no longer wants to scoot up and down the stairs on his belly but wants to full on walk one foot after another up and down. Which I can't help but just cringe watching, hoping he is not going to crash to the bottom and crack his head wide open. Its so hard not to whisk him up assuring he will not be hurt if I carry him, but its part of learning, so I cringe and he toddles up and down up and down.
He believes now that he should also sit at the table and not in his high chair so he sits in a booster chair at the table, he does great and I am proud.
He is already into the coloring on tables and walls , making art of my makeup and pouring whole boxes of cereal onto the floor.
He says: outside, shoes, fish, dad.  The reason he learned shoes is because he knows that is what comes before going outside.
He just got top and bottom molars and chasing them in are his eye teeth. Which from what I can tell are the worst yet.  Poor poor baby.  poor mommy too since neither of us are getting much sleep lately.

Zealand would be completely content and happy living outside w/his trusty bucket and shovel, vitamins, and his beloved camel back children's water bottle. He is obsessed with his chewable vitamins and it usually is causing more of a problem for me than good since that is all he wants and stands with his arm erect pointed at the cupboard where the vitamins live and hyperventilates.
I believe he his destined for a life of outdoors and adventure. Hiking, swimming, lounging, going w/me on my runs, he loves it all.
He loves horses, all animals really and wants to feed them anything from his favorite snack cracker to his favorite toy car.
He is fearless and determined.
Good humored and care free.
He laughs with me until we both can't breathe.
He is my sweet rascally boy.

Bang, splat

This is my splattered baby

(Zealand got a little too close to the action)

 This is my splattered kitchen

What happened is the balloons popped before the chocolate could dry and so it sent chocolate flying in every direction!

And for once Zealand's mischievous little hands were not responsible for this mess!
His mother was. It was in my attempt to entertain my 4 nephews and 1 niece who came to stay for five days while their lovely mother was recovering with the newest addition to the family! (Welcome baby Vince!)
When I saw these. I was thrilled to the gills! I would have loved to have made these as a kid (I still loved it since I really am just a kid inside of a big girl body) So it was one of the activities I thought the kiddos would love and would provide an afternoon of entertainment at least. And entertainment it was.
They did turn out…look…

And I wish I could say it was worth it.
It would have been if the kids would have enjoyed it but between the loud balloons popping that scared them all to death and the Peanut butter pudding that just didn't float their boat…it just wasn't.
Add on the two hours it took to scrub my kitchen walls, my table, my floors, Zealand, myself, dishes, and yes even my ceiling and blinds and I don't think I will be adding these to my recipe book.
Or maybe I will…. They are cute…and for the record the adults did enjoy them. I obviously didn't learn my lesson.