I wrote the post below June 14, 2013...and never published it. I obviously wrote it in a moment of animosity and after re-reading it the following morning realized it comes off, well, kinda like a toddler tantrum. But looking back on it almost exactly a year later I just laugh! It is especially funny because it was a similar rude public comment that prompted my return yesterday :) Enjoy my hissy fit blast from the past!
I need to get back to blogging in a major way. Never thought I would be this person, but I miss it. I have the added goal to get the blog printed in the future and give it to my three children as a replacement for the baby book I am not making. It took a catalyst to get me back, something that triggered a strong enough emotional response to force me to delay my bedtime 30 minutes to write this post. Here it is:
Anyone who says a stay-at-home mom "doesn't work", is someone who DOESN'T THINK.
While I'm on the subject, I may as well do a follow-up to my What Not to Say to a Woman Pregnant with Triplets post by sharing some things you should try to avoid when you happen upon this mom in public.
1. Realize that this woman probably hasn't been out in public in quite sometime. Don't invade her personal space, showers are seldom and she doesn't want your germs on her kids. Also, the mere task of loading and unloading her children burned 300 calories in Oklahoma heat...tired is an understatement and recall about the shower frequency...
2. The phrase "Looks like you have your hands full." See * below
3. "You're so lucky they will have playmates!" Yes!! My three infants delightfully entertain each other while I cook, craft and experiment with all the DIY projects I pinned on Pinterest. Seriously people?!? I appreciate that they are at least being positive. I too am very excited that my children have one another, however I am also aware of the reality of siblings. And siblings do not always get along. So in addition to the built in best friend, they will also have trouble sharing, hurt each others feelings and wish they had some privacy just like normal brothers and sisters.
Further more, it is not necessary to have something to say to every mom of triplets (or mothers in general). Saying nothing is OK, especially if you are not quite sure what to say. My mother's defense for said people is, "They just don't know what to say." Well, when I worked in retail and I found myself in a position where I wasn't quite sure what to say...(Is she pregnant or just wearing an unfortunately unflattering top? Is that a man or a woman??) I would simply be polite and not offer an antedotal comment.
*It seems I am not the only mom who finds offense in this seemingly harmless statement. Gosh I loved this post!!http://www.iloveyoumorethancarrots.com/2013/06/my-hands-will-be-even-fuller-when-i.html
6.19.2015
6.18.2015
"You know what causes that...
right?"
Last night this was the response I got from a woman upon finding out I was pregnant and already have 3. How do people say this without feeling wildly inappropriate and offensive? Ugh. I'm sure she is just the first of many. Why does our society hate babies?!?
Sorry, venting a bit because it honestly hurt my feelings. Luckily we have a lot of support and surround ourselves with people who are nonjudgemental about the number of children we have!! (She followed it up with, "Congratulations, I guess. Does that get a congratulations?")
Strange segway back to blogging, but an attempt at a recap seems insurmountable. So, here we are 14 weeks pregnant with NUMBER 4. Crazy! I need to expand on how we found out and my feelings on how the heck I am going to manage...but for now I just know I have three fantastic and destructive soon-to-be 3 olds and one sweet little BOY on the way!!
I am thanking God for this gift. It was undeniably His plan and not ours, which has forced me to grow and trust and adapt. And pray. Pray A LOT that we meet this little man in December and not any earlier!
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| Finding out it's a BOY! |
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| Don't be fooled, two minutes earlier Betsy was throwing a fit and refusing to hold her number :) |
4.08.2014
Betsy's Surgery - Day 2
This morning, I was home to feed the kids breakfast and start our morning routine. My mom was there to help, in fact she had stayed the night so that I wasn't alone with David being at the hospital. Mom's are the best. Around 8:00 I gathered some new books and food for Betsy and headed to the hospital. I was anxious to relieve David and see my sweet girl.
David had called at 4:00 in the morning to tell me that they were coming to draw Betsy's blood at 5:00. Not what I wanted to hear. I questioned him about why that was necessary in the first place, and if it was- why they couldn't take it after she wakes up. Poor guy, nothing like dealing with your upset wife at 4 am over something you have no control over. He asked the nurse, and they needed blood levels before the doctors did rounds at 7:00 and the information may help determine if she could start food. So he was support for our little girl while she got woken up to have her blood drawn. He said it took almost two hours to get calmed down and go back to sleep :(
I arrived and the two of them were in good spirits. The doctor had given us the green light to start food and I wasted no time giving her some yogurt. That child LOVES yogurt. It made her so happy and we were thrilled to see that she had an appetite. Next, David told me that the doctor had said we may get to go home. Oh my gosh, I cried. It was the absolute best news. Obviously we had to make sure she tolerated food and pooped ok (sorry, TMI, but poop is important!) I honestly don't know what David said to the doctor to allow for the possibility of leaving. The doctor was firm on 2 nights when I asked him...but whatever it was, I am so thankful!! We have found you really have to be an advocate for your care in the hospital and he was such a strong voice for Betsy.
David left to visit Dane and Estelle at home then went to work. Betsy and I played and read books and ate. Oh my, the girl dominated her lunch! Around 1:00 we saw the hospitalist that confirmed we would get to leave! Betsy was doing great and she could take her antibiotics at home- so we were set to be discharged! David came to pick us up and we had Betsy in her bed at home and napping by 2:30. It was just the most beautiful thing.
Betsy was happy to be home. She slept about 2.5 hours and woke up ready for a snack and eager to play with her brother and sister. Our afternoon and evening went along as normal. It felt so great to just be home. We would welcome a whole lot of normal (boring even) from here on out.
We have a follow up on Thursday to removed the drain. I'm still not quite clear on why they didn't take it out today...but hey, we are home so I'm not complaining. Then in 2 weeks we go to have the staples removed. And then, we throw a huge celebration...Betsy's Button Party! I already have a Pin Board ;)
David had called at 4:00 in the morning to tell me that they were coming to draw Betsy's blood at 5:00. Not what I wanted to hear. I questioned him about why that was necessary in the first place, and if it was- why they couldn't take it after she wakes up. Poor guy, nothing like dealing with your upset wife at 4 am over something you have no control over. He asked the nurse, and they needed blood levels before the doctors did rounds at 7:00 and the information may help determine if she could start food. So he was support for our little girl while she got woken up to have her blood drawn. He said it took almost two hours to get calmed down and go back to sleep :(
I arrived and the two of them were in good spirits. The doctor had given us the green light to start food and I wasted no time giving her some yogurt. That child LOVES yogurt. It made her so happy and we were thrilled to see that she had an appetite. Next, David told me that the doctor had said we may get to go home. Oh my gosh, I cried. It was the absolute best news. Obviously we had to make sure she tolerated food and pooped ok (sorry, TMI, but poop is important!) I honestly don't know what David said to the doctor to allow for the possibility of leaving. The doctor was firm on 2 nights when I asked him...but whatever it was, I am so thankful!! We have found you really have to be an advocate for your care in the hospital and he was such a strong voice for Betsy.
David left to visit Dane and Estelle at home then went to work. Betsy and I played and read books and ate. Oh my, the girl dominated her lunch! Around 1:00 we saw the hospitalist that confirmed we would get to leave! Betsy was doing great and she could take her antibiotics at home- so we were set to be discharged! David came to pick us up and we had Betsy in her bed at home and napping by 2:30. It was just the most beautiful thing.
Betsy was happy to be home. She slept about 2.5 hours and woke up ready for a snack and eager to play with her brother and sister. Our afternoon and evening went along as normal. It felt so great to just be home. We would welcome a whole lot of normal (boring even) from here on out.
We have a follow up on Thursday to removed the drain. I'm still not quite clear on why they didn't take it out today...but hey, we are home so I'm not complaining. Then in 2 weeks we go to have the staples removed. And then, we throw a huge celebration...Betsy's Button Party! I already have a Pin Board ;)
4.07.2014
Betsy's Surgery
We stopped using Betsy's button in December. And truly, it could have been sooner than that- but I was super paranoid about her not drinking enough and getting enough fluid. So that last month it was only used for water.
Our doctor requires approximately 3 months without using it AT ALL. So we called and updated them on her status, and on March 4th they removed her MIC-KEY button!! It was an incredible day. After the appointment we made a stop by the NICU and got to see some of our favorite nurses.
Turns out Betsy has a severe reaction to adhesive and her tummy broke out in an intense rash from the tape that held the gauze over the hole. So we spent a few days and a gazillion trips to Walgreens trying bandaids, and lotions and creams and wraps...Finally we found coban wrapped around her belly like a mummy is the only thing that worked. With anything else, she would scratch herself till she bled just screaming the whole time- not pleasant or good for a wound that is trying to heal.
Speaking of wounds healing, hers did not- which brings me to why I am writing this post in the first place. See, when a MIC-KEY button is removed, there is essentially a hole or channel from the inside of the stomach out through the top of the skin. Sometimes it closes on it's own, in our case it didn't. It was so close. The opening was about the size of a pin head, but it was still enough to occasionally leak stomach juices (gross, I know.) In order to close it a surgeon has to cut around that channel and stitch her stomach shut as well as her skin. It involves staples (removed after 14 days) and a drain (removed after 24 hours).
We are currently still in Day 1. David is staying overnight at the hospital tonight. I came home in time to cuddle Dane and Estelle and put them to sleep. David is beyond amazing in times of stress. It's unreal how he stays calm, cares for Betsy and checks in on my emotional status. Lord knows my emotional status is not easy to keep up with ;) Also, amazing is our family and friends. We had a rotation of help at home, food deliveries to the hospital and phone calls and texts of well-wishers and prayers. Our support system is the absolute BEST.
Surgery was at 8:15, check-in at 6:15am. Betsy did fantastic pre-op. I was worried she would be hungry for breakfast, but she seemed to distracted by the environment to be hungry. Post-op was a different story. Instead of sleeping off the anesthesia- the poor girl woke up the minute they took her breathing tube out and it took a solid hour and several pain meds to get her comfortable. After we made it to our room it was difficult for her to rest. I know nurses and doctors have to check on her and do their job, but I really wish they coordinated their visits. Every fifteen minutes it was someone new- med student getting info, listening to heart and lungs, 15 minutes later doctor doing the same, then nurse for vitals (temperature, blood pressure), then another nurse for height and weight...um, seriously?!?! we did that when we arrived?!!? Do they not write that on her chart?!?! The minute we would get her settled down and she would drift off to sleep a new person would bust in and turn on the light. I was not happy and neither was sweet Betsy. She was madder that a wet hornet each time.
Tomorrow she will be able to eat after only being allowed fluid today. Prayers that she tolerates food well would be wonderful. She also has the drain removed and I am hoping she gets to get that stupid IV out before she pulls it out herself. They said we may have to stay overnight again, gosh I hope not. There is not a whole lot to keep an 18 month old hooked up to an IV occupied with in a hospital room. Makes me incredibly thankful this is a short term stay.
More than anything, today reminded me of what a miracle Betsy's life is and how much she has overcome. That girl is a fighter and I am SO proud to be her mom.
Our doctor requires approximately 3 months without using it AT ALL. So we called and updated them on her status, and on March 4th they removed her MIC-KEY button!! It was an incredible day. After the appointment we made a stop by the NICU and got to see some of our favorite nurses.
Turns out Betsy has a severe reaction to adhesive and her tummy broke out in an intense rash from the tape that held the gauze over the hole. So we spent a few days and a gazillion trips to Walgreens trying bandaids, and lotions and creams and wraps...Finally we found coban wrapped around her belly like a mummy is the only thing that worked. With anything else, she would scratch herself till she bled just screaming the whole time- not pleasant or good for a wound that is trying to heal.
Speaking of wounds healing, hers did not- which brings me to why I am writing this post in the first place. See, when a MIC-KEY button is removed, there is essentially a hole or channel from the inside of the stomach out through the top of the skin. Sometimes it closes on it's own, in our case it didn't. It was so close. The opening was about the size of a pin head, but it was still enough to occasionally leak stomach juices (gross, I know.) In order to close it a surgeon has to cut around that channel and stitch her stomach shut as well as her skin. It involves staples (removed after 14 days) and a drain (removed after 24 hours).
We are currently still in Day 1. David is staying overnight at the hospital tonight. I came home in time to cuddle Dane and Estelle and put them to sleep. David is beyond amazing in times of stress. It's unreal how he stays calm, cares for Betsy and checks in on my emotional status. Lord knows my emotional status is not easy to keep up with ;) Also, amazing is our family and friends. We had a rotation of help at home, food deliveries to the hospital and phone calls and texts of well-wishers and prayers. Our support system is the absolute BEST.
Surgery was at 8:15, check-in at 6:15am. Betsy did fantastic pre-op. I was worried she would be hungry for breakfast, but she seemed to distracted by the environment to be hungry. Post-op was a different story. Instead of sleeping off the anesthesia- the poor girl woke up the minute they took her breathing tube out and it took a solid hour and several pain meds to get her comfortable. After we made it to our room it was difficult for her to rest. I know nurses and doctors have to check on her and do their job, but I really wish they coordinated their visits. Every fifteen minutes it was someone new- med student getting info, listening to heart and lungs, 15 minutes later doctor doing the same, then nurse for vitals (temperature, blood pressure), then another nurse for height and weight...um, seriously?!?! we did that when we arrived?!!? Do they not write that on her chart?!?! The minute we would get her settled down and she would drift off to sleep a new person would bust in and turn on the light. I was not happy and neither was sweet Betsy. She was madder that a wet hornet each time.
Tomorrow she will be able to eat after only being allowed fluid today. Prayers that she tolerates food well would be wonderful. She also has the drain removed and I am hoping she gets to get that stupid IV out before she pulls it out herself. They said we may have to stay overnight again, gosh I hope not. There is not a whole lot to keep an 18 month old hooked up to an IV occupied with in a hospital room. Makes me incredibly thankful this is a short term stay.
More than anything, today reminded me of what a miracle Betsy's life is and how much she has overcome. That girl is a fighter and I am SO proud to be her mom.
1.03.2014
Firsts.
OH.MY.GOSH. It's been so long! I can't even address the time lapse. Only to say it's part of my goals for 2013. Post once a month and drink at least 1 glass of water a day. Coffee can't continue to be the only liquid I consume.
Before I forget these things and have to make something up when my kids ask down the road, I need to document afew several firsts.
Crawler.
Dane took off a good month or so before Estelle got the hang of it. I have to say though, the most exciting moment was when Betsy started to crawl. The doctors had said that because of her MIC-KEY button she may never crawl. Some children find it so uncomfortable and develop such a strong disdain for tummy time that they skip crawling all together. Needless to say, when she did crawl I cried like a baby!
Word
Dane: Either 'dog' or 'roar', like the sound a lion makes. Yep, the lion on his exersaucer and in the color book we read must have made a big impact on him because it was his first sound/word.
Estelle: 'Ball'. A good solid word followed quickly by 'outside'. No joke! She would look out the window and say the cutest infant compound word you've ever heard.
Betsy: 'Uh-oh'. Equally as adorable was Betsy saying Uh-oh and then proceeding to drop something. A trend that continues.
Steps
Estelle: Since Dane was the first to crawl, Estelle had to take off on her feet first. Her first steps were to Aunt Debra. She wasn't wobbly long, and now rarely stops to sit and play but rather just walks aimlessly around the house just because she can.
Dane: He took his first few steps around December 30th and by January 1st walking was his preferred method of travel, regardless of the number of falls. He's not as fast as his sister, but I'm sure he'll get there.
Betsy: This girl thinks she can walk, but she's not quite there. She has taken to bear crawling on her hands and feet as if without her knees on the ground she is essentially walking :)
The kids turned 15 months on Christmas!! It was also our first Christmas with all three babies home, which was beyond amazing. Crazy what can change in a year?!? The day after Christmas we landed in the doctor's office, which is never fun. But I'm glad we went because the kids each had an ear infection and an upper respiratory virus. Besides getting medicine to help them feel better, another nice thing was getting their weights. I was super curious to see how many pounds I have been lifting, mainly because it is my only form of exercise. Very happy to be past the point of weight gain being a major concern and weekly checks.
December 26, 2013
Dane 20 lbs 12 oz Estelle 22 lbs Betsy 19 lbs
As of now, we are down to 2 bottles. Well, 1 and a half. Same with Betsy's tube feedings, only twice a day. I am more concerned about fluid intake than calories really. Holding steady at 2 naps- 10:00 and 2:00. Highlights of our day include story time, FaceTime with Aunt Dawn, visitors and Daddy coming home from work.
It was a unbelievable 2013. We feel tremendously blessed and are looking forward to a calmer year ahead :)
Before I forget these things and have to make something up when my kids ask down the road, I need to document a
Crawler.
Dane took off a good month or so before Estelle got the hang of it. I have to say though, the most exciting moment was when Betsy started to crawl. The doctors had said that because of her MIC-KEY button she may never crawl. Some children find it so uncomfortable and develop such a strong disdain for tummy time that they skip crawling all together. Needless to say, when she did crawl I cried like a baby!
Word
Dane: Either 'dog' or 'roar', like the sound a lion makes. Yep, the lion on his exersaucer and in the color book we read must have made a big impact on him because it was his first sound/word.
Estelle: 'Ball'. A good solid word followed quickly by 'outside'. No joke! She would look out the window and say the cutest infant compound word you've ever heard.
Betsy: 'Uh-oh'. Equally as adorable was Betsy saying Uh-oh and then proceeding to drop something. A trend that continues.
Steps
Estelle: Since Dane was the first to crawl, Estelle had to take off on her feet first. Her first steps were to Aunt Debra. She wasn't wobbly long, and now rarely stops to sit and play but rather just walks aimlessly around the house just because she can.
Dane: He took his first few steps around December 30th and by January 1st walking was his preferred method of travel, regardless of the number of falls. He's not as fast as his sister, but I'm sure he'll get there.
Betsy: This girl thinks she can walk, but she's not quite there. She has taken to bear crawling on her hands and feet as if without her knees on the ground she is essentially walking :)
The kids turned 15 months on Christmas!! It was also our first Christmas with all three babies home, which was beyond amazing. Crazy what can change in a year?!? The day after Christmas we landed in the doctor's office, which is never fun. But I'm glad we went because the kids each had an ear infection and an upper respiratory virus. Besides getting medicine to help them feel better, another nice thing was getting their weights. I was super curious to see how many pounds I have been lifting, mainly because it is my only form of exercise. Very happy to be past the point of weight gain being a major concern and weekly checks.
December 26, 2013
Dane 20 lbs 12 oz Estelle 22 lbs Betsy 19 lbs
As of now, we are down to 2 bottles. Well, 1 and a half. Same with Betsy's tube feedings, only twice a day. I am more concerned about fluid intake than calories really. Holding steady at 2 naps- 10:00 and 2:00. Highlights of our day include story time, FaceTime with Aunt Dawn, visitors and Daddy coming home from work.
It was a unbelievable 2013. We feel tremendously blessed and are looking forward to a calmer year ahead :)
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