Christmas Eve & Christmas Morning

One of our family traditions is for Wes's parents to come over on Christmas Eve Day and stay the night.  This started a long time ago when we lived far apart and Wes's parents would travel to visit us over the holidays.  Now that they live so close, they don't have to spend the night to visit us the next day.  But after 13 years of being here on Christmas Eve, we just didn't think it would be right to change the tradition--they are part of it.  Besides, if they weren't sleeping on the couches, who would protect Santa and the stockings from sabotage by crazy teens and their schemes?!

 

 

This is what it is all about . . . snuggles!

Leah has to stock up on her snuggle while she can!

What we love about Christmas Eve and Christmas Day--
LOTS OF SNUGGLES!

I don't have a picture of this part--but it is also our tradition to read Luke 2 and talk about the
True meaning of Christmas on Christmas Eve.  When the children were little,
we used to act it our for Gramma and Grampa, even dressing up
and using "Arnold" our big stuffed horse as a donkey for Mary.
 We don't act it out anymore, the kids don't want to.
 But we enjoy an evening considering our blessings and gifts
that come from the birth, life, and Atonement of
our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. 

Another family tradition: WES (not Melissa)
males homemade cinnamon rolls on Christmas Eve. 
And they are sooo good!

After eating one with a tall glass of milk, the kids leave a
 plate for Santa and his reindeer.

 

The shot of the tree Christmas morning.
 

She's trying to guess what is in her package.

 

Elias in his favorite chair looking at a Star Wars sticker and story book Santa brought him. 
He was all about Star Wars this year. 

Leah loved the easel that her Grampa built for her. 
She loves art, writing, creating, you name it!

When these got unwrapped, they were opened with
exclamations of  "what in the world are these for?"
Not even Mckay could figure out what they were for.
And then they opened the air soft guns!

Elias opening more Star Wars with Mckay eying them and thinking,
 "Oh yeah, I'll help him play with these!"

Gramma opening the gift Elias got her.

More things to keep us connected as teams while we
 play capture the flag air-soft and other games.

Wes bought me this rug in Nauvoo, Ill. on our trip a few years ago.
  I wanted to hang it but never got around to it.  So he made, by hand,
a pole for me to hang it on and then hung it for me.  It was a great present. 

This present sat in the other room.  He didn't even notice it all morning.
 I bet he kept wondering why he didn't have much under the tree.
 But once everyone was done unwrapping, we directed he attention  . . .

. . . .to the large sheet in the opposite room.
  I'm sure he knew immediately what it was. 

But he was still excited!

Oh yes!

A traditional scene: all of us gathered around Gramma
as she looks at her yearly photo album made by Melissa.

Next, we gather around Grampa to look at his yearly picture calendar.

 

Faux Camping

We like to go camping.  Over Christmas break we had high hopes of spending a few days camping--we can do that in December because of the delicious Southern California weather.  Even when the weather is cold, and often even when it is rainy,one can putter over towards Palm Desert and find agreeable weather.  True, it is desert, but there are still enjoyable activities such as kite flying, hiking and rock climbing, rock and gem hounding, air soft gun wars, archery . . . huge evening bonfires. 

Alas, this December, it was too cold for us to brave it.  We've actually had one of the coldest winters I've experienced in Southern California.  Not that our 28 degree weather can even touch the negative degrees I experienced in Idaho! Still, Wes and I figured it was a little too chilly for the kids (okay--for us parents) to go camping.  We were bummed because we didn't have much else to do and we were tired of sitting around in the house. 

That's when I came up with the brilliant idea of faux camping.  My brother owns a home in the mountains.  His mother-in-law lives there, but was out of town for the holidays.  I made arrangements and we packed up--off to go "camping" in my brother's house.  In the basement, there is a stove and a large, empty spot of carpet.  We unrolled our sleeping bags on the floor and started our "campfire." 
What a fun time we had . . . as you can see in our pictures.  Isn't it funny how just being somewhere else (besides home) can change the atmosphere and create a little adventure? 

Roasting marsh mellows over our campfire.

I'm not sure about his face???
But I know he's excited to eat his smore.

Everyone roasting hot dogs for dinner.

It was cold, but since we knew we could get warm and dry, we went out in the forest for a romping good game of "hide-and-seek-air soft."  Leah was the best hider, but when the opposing team found her, she had to be saved by her teammates!

My mom makes me wear these silly goggles so I don't shoot my eye out!

"How do these look on me?"

Watch out for dad, he's a good shot!

When we got too cold, we played monopoly as a family for the first time ever.
  It was New Year's Eve, so we played long hours late into the evening.

And we ate donuts.

Oh Yeah!
Nice lipstick Ryanne.

Then we cheered in the New Year and toasted with our Martinelli's.

The next day we went to the playground.



It was cold, but after running around for a bit, we started to shed the layers.

We played basketball,

They had fun trying to slam-dunk the ball.

 

I just thought they were cute.

Someone, Mckay I think, had the crazy idea of playing snow soccer!  That was wild! 

It's not an easy thing to run and kick a ball on icy, melting snow!
 

"Ahhhh!" "I'm falling!"

 



Several people ended up on their bums!



 

Elias kept throwing snow at me!

 

Ryanne wanted to use her new water polo ball to practice throwing and catching.



Mcaky, Wes and I had a quick lesson from her on how to handle the ball . . .



He doesn't look as sure of himself as he did when playing soccer and basketball!

In the meantime, Leah and Elias had fun on the playground.

Upside down sliders!

 

All-in-all we had a great two day get-away and most of all,

we really enjoyed spending some uninterrupted time as a family. 

 

Just Another Day . . . with my dear friend Fibromyalgia

I've had a rough go the last four or five days.  Lots of pain.  My coping strategy is to ignore it and just keep going.  Wes has come to understand that when I am busiest around the house, it is a sign of my discomfort.  He is so sweet because he does notice this and offers to take over whatever I happen to be cleaning or fixing.  He doesn't understand that I can't bear to go lay down as he suggests I do.  When I keep busy, I don't think about how I feel. The pain is kept at bay in the back of my mind as I focus on the tasks at hand. 

Business  usually works, but sometimes I fail to see that because of the pain I get rather snappy and short with my family.  I don't usually recognize what's going on until I lose my temper at someone.  Then, putting myself on time out in my room, I ask myself, "What is wrong with me?  That kid didn't do anything bad, why am I grousing at them?"  As I sit there feeling guilty, I suddenly realize that my head, neck, back, and especially legs are throbbing with pain.  I think about the pain.  It consumes me.  I'm on fire and under a steam roller.  There's not much I can do about the pain.  I want to fall into oblivion, become unconscious . . .but the likelihood of sleep is a far off dream.  The pain will go away with time. 

After 10 years of trying to figure out the what, where, when, and why of the pain, I still don't understand what triggers it.  At least not completely.  Sometimes I can prevent it--I avoid certain foods and try to stay away from crowded, noisy places (well--I don't really stay away, but I know that for two days afterwards I'm not going to feel well).  I exercise moderately and sleep regular hours.  All these things help, but none of them cure me.  Sometimes, inexplicably, I just hurt!

I can't fix the pain I have, but I can fix the pain I  cause.  I apologize to the child  (or to Wes) and explain to them that it wasn't their fault I was short-tempered and grumpy.  I tell them I hurt.  We talk.  We hug.

It is usually loud, wrestly-silly activities that cause me to snap.  But kids are kids, they need to be loud and wrestly and silly.  So sometimes when I hurt and they are energetic, I hide.  In my quiet room.  For a while.  They are learning that this doesn't mean I don't like them, but that I can't handle the activity and noise. 

Since I don't wrestle and chase, my favorite thing to do with my children is read to them.  We must have thousands of books under our belts that we've read together and I've turned my children into book addicts! The girls and I also like to color together.  It's fun that even Ryanne enjoys this.  She says it is "therapeutic."  We color fairies with colored pencils and gel-pens that my mom gave us.  Sometimes Leah and Elias play card games with me and sometimes I build towers of blocks with Elias.  Leah likes all kinds of crafts and lately we have been scrap-booking together: she does her pictures while I work on Elias's.

The hardest person for me to connect with is Mckay because he's really not into coloring, or playing cards, and he's too old for me to read to him (so he says, although he often sneaks near me when I am reading to Elias and Leah).  Being 13, Mckay is into loud, big, outdoor, action.  I'm still searching for something we can do together that he likes.  In the meantime, I feed him a lot and make him special snacks.  He likes that and I don't worry about it because he is a tall toothpick.  (He grew another inch and a half in the last month!!!  He's up to 5'7").

I used to worry so much that I wouldn't be a good enough mom because I couldn't do and be everything I thought I should be for my kids because of my fibromyalgia.  But I am watching them grow into understanding, forgiving, and very capable people.  They know how to work and to cook and to maintain a house.  They can take care of themselves and each other.  They are friends with each other.  They are willing to forgive.  They are tender and compassionate. They share my struggles with me and it has changed their lives as well as mine.  Sometimes it is very frustrating for all of us.  But we are growing together because of it. 


When I was first officially diagnosed with fibromyalgia I had a lot of anger and depression.  I even had a few moments of anger at the Lord.  I really didn't want to spend the rest of my life being held back from my goals and aspirations by some stupid, non-understood illness.  I wanted to run marathons, be a super-mom involved in everything, single-handedly change the world! (Just kidding).  I cried a lot.  I complained a lot to Wes.  I didn't really talk to anyone else about how I felt, but I had a good friend at that time who saved me.  She didn't know much about my fibro and I didn't say much. But she would come over and hold my babies and play with my children and talk.  She kept my mind on other things and helped me to find joy in my life the way it was.  She never judged me for all the things I wasn't getting done that I thought I should be getting done. 

I look back now and see how loving God was to send this friend into my life at just the right moment.  He knew what I needed then.  He still does. 

I have learned so much about myself because of my limitations.  My character has changed over the years.  I am continuously learning patience for myself and for others.  I learn not to judge, but to find out what peoples' stories are.  I have a much greater empathy and compassion.  I have learned to be happy with what I can do even though it doesn't seem like much compared to so many others I know. I am limited and I have come to be content with that (most of the time)!  Of course, all these things are a continuous work in progress within me, but I am learning and changing my very being because of this illness. 


And I really can't wait for the resurrection!

Mckay's Birthday Presents

Mckay was very hard to shop for this year.  His birthday is Nov. 30th.  But his,"I Dunno???" answer to our question of, "What do you want for your birthday or for Christmas?" did not help any of us parents or grandparents.  I tried threatening him with no presents, but he still couldn't give us any suggestions.
Finally Wes and I had a thought.  This was something he loved doing at boy scout camp this past summer: Archery.  It was a little pricey, but since we couldn't think of anything else, here's what we did:

We bought him two bows and some arrows, and a bale of straw,
and marched it all over to an empty field.
Then we let loose!

Mckay was very excited.  He really liked his present. 

I think Elias is wearing the bike helmet just in case he gets shot!
Hee-Hee!
Dad is talking about "The Rules"
Leah is pulling up her pants!

AHH! Don't shoot!
Wait, wasn't one of those rules something about NOT pointing those arrows at people?!
Oh, they don't really have arrows, they're just faking!

Dad spent most of his time helping. 
But he also got some pretty good shooting in too.

Leah probably enjoyed it the least.
After her turn, she would gladly run off to play with Elias.

Cheesey grin!
I love archery.  But I'm not very good at it!

Somebody's hitting the target.  Just not me!

Ryanne and Mckay like it the best.
Ryanne feels like she's Katniss Everdeen.
But Mckay is a better shot!

"Hey Mom!"  "If you don't stop shooting pictures, I'm going to shoot you!"