Happy one month

My Jack Thomas is one month old today. The time has flown by. Even those times when I don't know what I'm doing and I want to cry more than Jack already is. I never knew my heart could love so much.

Stats and such will be posted later in the week when we go to the doctor. Suffice it to say that he is growing way too fast for his momma's liking.





Why does he look so grown up here? Could be the polo onsie or the smile.



His wrinkly old man face. He wrinkles that forehead all the time. I tell him he's gonna get wrinkles but he thinks it will make him look distinguished.




Just plain sweetness right here




And finally, his wardrobe of choice these days: the swaddling blanket. Without it, he has major meltdowns. Between this and being so hot-natured, he will probably not be wearing clothes in his pictures any time soon. Unless someone is holding him.

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Sleep

I am so tired. AND I got 8 straight hours of sleep last night because Neil took care of the baby. I'm currently pretending to sleep because I just need some alone time. I didnt even get up to pump last night. Shame on me but I was just soooo tired and we had enough bottles pumped.

For the last week, jack has struggled with sleep. It started off just being between the hours of 11 pm and 1:30 am but progressed to being at every time I would put him down for a nap. We thought it might be gas because boy is little man gassy. Then I thought it could be because I was putting him down for naps in his crib which was new to him.

Yesterday he took it to a whole new level when he pretty much screamed his way through his naptime. I remembered that my friend Hannah's baby wanted to be swaddled all the time.

For the first two weeks of Jack's life, he also wanted to be swaddled. But then he started sweating through his clothes and/or blanket and would kick the blanket off. He was too little for the swaddling blanket with the little pocket for his feet and the flap to Velcro him in so we couldn't use it yet.

I decided yesterday to try it regardless of how hot he was and it fit him better. Oh my gosh the difference! He slept in his crib and fell asleep immediately after being swaddled. It was a miracle!

Of course, Neil got the benefits of this last night. When I got up a little while ago to check on them (Neil stayed in the other room with jack last night so I could sleep), Neil said he he had no problems and it was"easy." I had to take a deep breath because I immediately thought "he's probably wondering why I'm so tired all the time since it was so "easy" for him." I wanted to remind him that I get up with him every night and have to pump every time I'm up too. Instead, (and this is a big deal for me) I simply said "I'm glad it was so easy for you" and walked away.

I'm lucky that Neil is willing to feed Jack during the weekend nights and that Jack is sleeping better but some little part of me wanted him to see how tough it can be sometimes during the night. I have tried to shield Neil from that since he has to work. We have never kept jack in our bedroom at night. Jack and I sleep in the living room that is way far away from our room since Neil has sleeping problems and is working.

So two thumbs up for a good nights sleep for Jack and I. One thumb down for me wishing it would have been just a little bit tougher on Neil last night. I'm horrible, I know. I just don't think he truly gets how tiring it is to care for a baby around the clock on a daily basis. But I'm grateful for all that he does for us.


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Mommy's new man

Mommy's new man. Yes, man. He looks so big in this picture. It makes me sad already because he is growing so much. Isn't that polo shirt and smile combo just a heartbreaker?

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Thanksgiving week

Jack had a very busy first week of life. He was born the week of Thanksgiving which could not have been more appropriate. We tried so hard to have this little boy and God brought him into the world just in time for us to celebrate our most precious blessing imaginable. A year old on the day after Thanksgiving, I had a miscarriage with our first pregnancy. It was devastating and I could not help but think about how things would have been different.  But you know what, we wouldn't have Jack now and I can't imagine my life without him now. Plus I know that I will meet my angel baby one day in heaven. What a difference a year makes. I never would have imagined then that I would have a newborn baby a year from that date.

We got released from the hospital around 1:00 on Wednesday. That night Jack took his first trip out of the house and hospital to Neil's mother's house for his very first Thanksgiving. KK, as my mother-in-law will be called, only lives about 5 minutes away but a first trip out is still a first trip out. We have themed thanksgiving dinners there and this year it was German. KK cooked goose, some type of potato dish, apple dressing, sauerkraut and sausage, green beans, cherry pie, and some type of yummy apple dessert. We had a great time and Jack did just fine.

On Thanksgiving day, Jack and I traveled to Little Rock to my mom's house. My step-dad's family was in town so they all got to meet Mr. Jack. Neil did not go with us as his dad's side of the family was having lunch at the same time. Jack and I traveled back to Greenbrier to enjoy some quality time with them after lunch. Jack is lucky enough to have his step-aunt (Neil's step-brother's wife) work at the daycare he will be attending. She will look after him in the afternoon and we feel so blessed to have a family member take care of him. She also has a daughter who is exactly 4 months older than Jack. We think they are going to be great friends.

On Friday we traveled back to Little Rock to have thanksgiving lunch with my grandparents and extended family. We barely made it to lunch on time because Jack had a doctor's appointment that morning. We ended up having to go the hospital to get his jaundice level checked and it made us run very late. His jaundice level was in the 75th percentile, but he didn't need light treatment thank the Lord! After lunch, the entire family went upstairs to watch the Arkansas VS LSU game. What a potentially great game to be Jack's first; too bad the Razorbacks forgot to show up and lost in a very disappointing fashion.

All in all, we had a wonderful time introducing Jack to the family. They did not get to all hold him at the hospital, but they more than made up for it this week. I think it spoiled him to be held all day because now he is very clingy! I don't mind though because there is nothing better than cuddles from my boy.

November 21, 2011

This is the day that I found out how much my mother loves me.

I got up around 3:30 am to use the bathroom. On my way back to bed, I heard a huge gush of water hit the bathroom floor. Yep, my water had broken. Although at the time I wasn't sure. I had some important paperwork due fir work that morning so I decided I better do it in case I started having contractions. I was pretty sure I would be going into labor but didn't know when. (I realize now that when your water breaks, you ARE in labor. Silly me.) I began devising a plan how how I could get the lunch items I had in car up to work so the kids we had coming to our program that day could eat. All this time, liquid was still coming. At 5 am I decided to call my mom and ask if my water had actually broken and to decide what to do. I still had not woken up Neil because he is sleeping on the couch while he recovers from his stomach surgery.

So I call my mom and she told me I needed to get to the hospital to make sure that I wasn't just leaking amniotic fluid. But she was pretty sure I was having the baby today. Neil wakes up before I can get to him and I tell him I'm in labor. I have a mini breakdown because my hospital bag isn't packed, it's storming badly outside and the baby's room is a mess.

Fast forward an hour and we get confirmation that I am in labor and they won't try to stop it even though the baby is 4 weeks early. The nurse then jumps starts my anxiety by giving me all the details on what could be wrong with the baby since he is a month early.

Contractions have started by this point and feel pretty uncomfortable. I get taken to my room and I measure at 2 centimeters dilated. I decided to get my epidural at 8:00. Families are called and told baby McKnight is coming today. Oh and the epidural felt awful at the time. I now know that compared to the pushing part if my delivery, the epidural was nothing!

I progressed really quickly and around noon I was an 8. They told me in half an hour I would start pushing. I text my family who is in the cafeteria eating and they come running. Baby jack had other ideas though. I stay at an 8, then 9, then 9.5 forever it seems like. Around 3:15 I am told it's time to push. Because the first part of labor was SO easy, I had no idea what was to come.

Baby jack did not want to come out. They could see his hair immediately and out up a mirror so I could push better. Yes, I saw it ALL. Every time I would push he would move a little then go right back. Then he started hitting my pelvis bone. About an hour and a half in, I just couldn't do it anymore. I was exhausted and in incredible pain. The doctor was called in to motivate me and I pretty much told her she was going to have to do something to get the baby out of me! I had pushed for almost 2 hours and i was just done physically and emotionally. My tank was empty. Eventually she had to use the vacuum on him. His head came out but then his shoulders got stuck. The nurses and doctor had to push him out of my stomach. If you've ever had this done, you know how excruciating this is.

As much as I hated the pushing, hearing my little man cry and seeing him for the first time was a heavenly experience. His poor face and head were all bet up. His face was swollen, his nose was crooked and bruised and his head was so coned, but he was beautiful!!

He actually looked so beat up that Neil and his mom were worried that he had down's syndrome. Not that we would have loved him any less, but I found out later they were very worried. Not me though. Jack was my angel.

His swelling has gone down now, his nose has corrected itself and his head shape is normal. Just in case you were wondering.

Neil's aunt told me last night that once you go through labor and hold your child, you realize how much your own mother loves you. Truer words have never been spoken.






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My miracle baby

I went from this:



To this:



In a super surprising way!

I'm so proud to introduce Jack Thomas McKnight. Born at 36 weeks on November 21, 2011 at 5:04 pm. He weighed 6 pounds, 9 ounces and was 18.5 inches.

He is named Jack after my dear father who passed away December 3, 2004. His middle name Thomas is my husband's middle name, Neil's father's middle name, and also Neil's grandfather and great-grandfather's first name.

Here are some more sweet pictures of my miracle baby. In the first few pictures his face is very swollen and his head is very long. It was a difficult delivery and he had to be vacuumed out. He looks much better now though!




My brother and Jack




















My sister-in-law Annie and Jack









He screams unless he is swaddled or skin to skin with with someone. The doctor said it's because his brain is still developmentally at 36 weeks although his body looks full term and he is missing the comfort and security of my womb.

I cannot tell you how much we love our little man.

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Surprise!

My water broke this morning at 3:30 am. I'm currently 2 cm dilated. Baby boy is 3.5 weeks early so please pray for his lungs and a safe delivery.


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Yes!!

Neil is on his way home!!!

Post-Op Day 5

Day 5 Monday:

Woo Hoo!! Neil got his nose drainage tube out today. This is a milestone! His entire affect took a 180 degree turn. He was joking, rolling his eyes, and had his personality back. I am so thrilled! He got to eat 5 popsicles, although he was tired of them by the end of the day. I feel like I have my husband back and it is such a great feeling. His incision still hurts which is normal. He stayed the night by himself tonight. I'm still waiting to hear how that went. We still have no word on when he gets to come home, but hopefully it will be soon. They should start him on broth, jello, and clear liquids today (fingers crossed). All together, it was a great day and I hope there are much more to come.

In baby news, we now have 38 days to go!! As long as the baby stays put long enough to get Neil home, I'm ready for baby to come whenever he chooses. The nursery is just about ready. We just need to hang a few things and then get a rug, table, and lamp.

Post-op Day 2, 3, and 4

Day 2: Friday
Neil did well. In some pain, but was able to get up and walk around the floor of the unit. So proud of this man!! We found out why he was in so much pain late Thursday night and I was NOT happy. First of all, 3 nurses had shifts before any of this was found out. 1) his leg thingy that prevent blood clots were not even turned on; 2) his nose tube that drains his stomach fluid was not working properly; and 3) his IV pole had low batteries which meant that his medication was not always working. UGH!!! Once that all started working, Friday was much better!!

Day 3: Saturday
Neil and I hung out all day. We walked the unit 5 times. I was more worn out than he was! More problems with the nursing staff. Neil had complained all day that his IV was hurting. Plus he was getting hungry (he shouldn't have been because he was getting nutrients) and he was not urinating as much as he had been. All the staff did was put more tape on it. Thankfully, the night nurse finally looked at it and discovered that his vein was blown. This means that he had not received nutrients and some medication. Luckily, his epidural was still in so that was providing some medication and comfort. They were unable to get a new vein for his IV because he was so dehydrated. FINALLY the head nurse was able to get one because they were going to have to put in a PICC line the next morning if they couldn't get the IV restarted.

Day 4: Sunday
His epidural was taken out and replaced by a morphine drip. Much more pain today and he was restless. However, he walked the floor 7 times like a superstar! Tomorrow he should get the nose tube out and get started on liquids. I think this will help his recovery so much as well as make him much more comfortable. I can't wait to get him home with me!!

Post-Op Day 1

Day 1:
I ran by the hospital this morning on my way to a meeting in Little Rock. Neil was still kind of out of it due to the anesthesia. He was sleepy, but at least I got to put my eyes on him and talk to him for a little while. While I was at my meeting, the nurse got Neil out of bed and sitting in a chair. The doctor wanted him to do this 3 times today. After my meeting I went straight to the hospital. Neil was sitting in the chair again for the second time. He was way more alert and feeling much better. We had several visitors today. I met Neil's sweet cousin Melanie at the hospital so she could see Neil and then his best friend Justin came by as well. My step-dad Ty stopped by after work as did our friends Jeff and Ashlee. Neil was joking around and talking without any pain.

Around 6 pm, the pain started really kicking in again. The medication wasn't working and Neil still had to get out of bed one more time. The nurse came by and Neil tried and tried to get out of the bed, but the pain was just too much. The nurse decided to let Neil get away with just 2 times out of bed today. By this time, Neil was only communicating in grunts and one word sentences as it hurt him too much to do any more. Ugh it just breaks my heart to see him in so much pain. I know the pain is getting worse because he is actually using his stomach muscles and this is good for him, but it is just painful to see him this way. The nurse said the next 24-48 hours will be the worst of the pain because the anesthesia is wearing off and he will be moving again. I just pray that Neil can withstand all the pain and begin to heal. His sweet momma is staying with him again tonight so that I can try and get rest in an actual bed. She is the best mother-in-law and mother EVER.

Thank you again for all the prayers and support!! Keep 'em coming!

Relief and blessings

God again has showered down His blessings on Neil and me. In the past year, I have miraculously gotten pregnant with our baby boy, sold a house in a horrible housing market in a town plagued with earthquakes, found our "forever home," and now he has blessed us with a wonderful outcome to Neil's surgery today.

There is NO CANCER!!!

No need to wait on a biopsy. The tumor was made up of pancreatic cells. Apparently, when Neil was a fetus in utero and his organs were forming, pancreatic cells migrated away from his pancreas and settled on the outside of his stomach. There they grew as he grew; thus the tumor. Praise the Lord!!!

On the downside, Neil has a tube up his nose that is draining his stomach fluid in order to keep his stitches dry. This means no food or drink until this tube comes out....like probably 4 days. They will then move him to liquids and then soft foods. They are also going to try and get him up and walking tomorrow. Please continue your prayers as the days ahead are going to difficult for Neil.

We are so thankful for all the love and support you have shown to my precious husband. Now we have to get him healed up so we can welcome our baby boy to the world. Please pray that he doesn't decide to join us until Neil is out of the hospital. That is Neil's greatest worry.

A test of faith

So Neil and I have been through some stress over the past week. Last week on Tuesday, Neil had a procedure done to stretch his esophagus. He gets meat stuck in his throat when he eats sometimes and has very bad acid reflux. This was to be a routine procedure. WAS to be. They called me back to see him and he was still out of it due to the anesthesia. The doctor informs me that the procedure went well, BUT he found a mass in Neil's stomach. Totally coincidentally. Obviously I was concerned. The doctor was acting nervous and told me that he only sees something like this once every two to three years. Cue the anxiety and tears.

I was informed that best case scenario was that Neil would need part of his stomach removed to get to the tumor. Worst case: stomach cancer. My blood pressure shot through the roof and the baby went crazy. I seriously thought I might go into labor. I tried to be strong because I knew Neil wasn't understanding anything that was going on. He knew I was upset and kept asking why I was mad at him. Poor, sweet man.

Meanwhile, the doctor was bombarding me with doctor's appointments that I needed to set up in order to gather more information on this tumor. Neil needed Xrays and a CT scan done STAT. The doctor also said he did a biopsy but did not know if it would be accurate because it was from the inside of his stomach and the tumor looked like it was actually pushing against the outside of the stomach.

I managed to get Neil into the car and attempted to explain what was going on. He still didn't understand. While I stopped at Sonic to get him a milkshake, I had to call his mother to relay the bad news. NOT a call anyone ever wants to make. I couldn't stop crying and poor Neil had no idea. When we finally got home, I explained again what was going on. This time he got it. It broke my heart to tell him that he might have cancer and definitely needed stomach surgery. A major surgery. 8 weeks before our son was due. Now Neil is a strong man who does not show his emotions very often. This past week has been very difficult on him.

We got all the tests done and met with the doctor again Tuesday of this week. The biopsy came back clear, praise the Lord. However, we knew we weren't out of the woods yet. Luckily, my wonderful grandfather called a stomach doctor who is a family friend and got us into a surgeon in Little Rock very quickly for a consult. We went today to the consult. Neil will have stomach surgery to remove part of his stomach plus the tumor. The doctor will then sew the rest of his stomach together. He will be in the hospital 5-7 days which he is not happy about. However, I am glad because Neil is a "do-er" and I know he would attempt to move around and do stuff if he were at home. He will not be able to pick up anything over 20 pounds for 4 weeks after the surgery. The timeline on this was so important to us because the baby is now due in 7 weeks and I really think he will come early. With God's grace, Neil will be fully recovered before our baby boy decides to come. The tumor will be biopsied when it is removed and only then will we feel real peace about the whole situation.

Please, please pray for Neil, pray for the doctor, and pray that the baby stays put. This is going to be difficult on him. He is not one to sit around and be lazy, he will most likely be alone overnight because I will have to go home, and we want him healed and out of the hospital before the baby comes. That is our greatest fear: that the baby will come while he is still hospitalized. I cannot do the delivery without him. Ok, I know I could but I do not want to. At all.

This week has been a huge test of my faith. I had many conversations with God regarding the baby's need to have his father physically present in his life. Neil mentioned one time that if anything happened to him, he wanted me to get remarried so our son would have a father. Oh Lordy did that get to me. It is something I cannot even contemplate. A friend told me that when we worry, we are not trusting the Lord. So this week I had to make a conscious effort out loud to give my worries to God because I knew he would take care of us. And He will. It may not go as we want or how we think it should go, but He always has us in His arms taking care of us.

Thank you in advance for the prayers that we will receive and that we have already received from my family who was aware of what was going on. We couldn't make it without you.

The countdown begins

So we are down to 50 days until my due date. What?! The time has flown by and we just get more and more excited.  Neil and I talked about the delivery last night. I'm obviously getting very nervous about it. Pain and I do not go well together. That is what I am most worried about. My family is aware that I am a total wuss. Neil has requested that he is the only person in the delivery room when it comes time to push and I think it is so sweet of him. He wants that time with just me and the baby afterward. I love that. I go for an appointment today to have my stomach measured and hear the heartbeat. Next week I start my weekly appointments and we will get an estimate on how much this big boy will weigh. I can't believe that I only have 7 weeks left. 50 days. Holy Cow!

On another note, we are also going through something right now that we need some prayers for. We've gotten over one hurdle but still have several more left to go. It has nothing to do with me or baby. We are both fine. I hope to be able to give more information later in the week, but for now we just need prayers please. Sorry for being so cryptic but I don't want to discuss this without all the information and we just don't have it right now. However, I know our God is faithful and He will bring us through anything we face with strength, dignity, healing, and comfort.

Random iPhone pictures

New boots!





Baby's first outfit from his momma







Vintage Razorback jerseys for the baby. Found at a yard sale for twenty-five cents. Score!!





My sweet hubs!




My baby girl




Homemade roasted red pepper soup made by Neil




Words of wisdom. Gonna paint this on a canvas and hang in my office




A really cool assembly we had at school. Used music to educate about bullying and treating others with respect




A kindergartner's lunch tray at school. I think he loved the corn!




Another speaker we had at school. Olympic high jumper Hollis Conway. His presentation was inspiring and the kids loved it.




Me and a sweet co-worker's daughter

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31 weeks

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78 days

Eeeeeek! 78 days til my due date. Until my life changes forever. Well, life has already changed, but you know what I mean. I get to have another ultrasound today. I actually thought the ultrasound was yesterday, so Neil changed his whole day around so he could go. Then I get to work, look at my planner, and realize the appointment isn't until the next day. Oops. Neil wasn't very happy with me, but I blame the hormones for making me so confused all the time. I really thought all day Tuesday that it was actually Wednesday and thought Wednesday was Thursday. I tried to put the trash out and everything.

The baby had hiccups the other night. It was the strangest, but neatest feeling. He was hiccuping on one side of my belly and kicking on the other. My belly has started moving all around with the baby's movements and it feels so...strange. I use that word a lot but it is definitely different to have something moving around in your belly. Today I get new pictures of the baby and take the glucose test for gestational diabetes. I'll put up pictures of the baby and my belly afterward. I'm really big now. People can't believe I have 11 weeks left. They saw I look like I could deliver any day. One of my friend's son said it looked like I had "100 babies" in my belly. hahaha. Hilarious.

Most importantly, I have a friend who is ~31 weeks pregnant and in the hospital. She went into early labor last Saturday but the doctors were able to stop it. However, she has to stay in the hospital until she delivers. She is due early December. Please pray for her, her husband, their sweet baby boy, and the hospital staff. I can't imagine the stress she is under right now. Thank you all dearly.

Happy Thursday!!

seeking support through infertility

Recently, I was talking to a co-worker in another office about my fertility struggle. She immediately went over and grabbed another one of our co-workers and said "you have to listen to Lauren's story." The second co-worker is also struggling with infertility. She talked about the loneliness and frustration of trying to have kids and not being able to get pregnant, especially when everyone around her seems to be pregnant. I totally got it. It seems that when you are struggling to get pregnant, you get these special lenses on your eyes that magnifies all the pregnancies around you. It seems like everyone is pregnant BUT you.

And it hurts. Oh how it hurts your heart so much. You wonder what is wrong with you, what is God trying to teach you, why you are broken, why you struggle when so many people don't have to. Lots and lots of questions with very few answers. It can be debilitating. And lots of women struggling with infertility don't confide in others, preferring instead to keep their struggle quiet. I would strongly encourage those of you who are going through this without a support system to turn to those you love and trust. Share your hurts and frustrations with those you love so they can, in return, love and support you too.

We kept our difficulties getting pregnant a secret too. But finally I realized I couldn't do it anymore without more support. without more love and more prayers. The response I got from my friends and family was amazing. Their prayers pulled me through times when I didn't think I could continue to fight to have a child, when I just wanted to give up.

Let me and others pray for you, support you, and love you through your dark times. It makes a huge difference, I promise.

Nursery pictures

We got the nursery painted today. So now when people ask if my nursery is done, they won't look at me in shock when my answer is "nope, we haven't done anything yet." At least now I can say we have started! Now we have to steam clean the carpet and put the crib together. We're still on the hunt for drapes, accessories, and a glider. Here are some pictures from today. Major thanks to my mom and step-dad who came to paint even though they were sick. And thanks to Neil too who helped out. I love it.






















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Sneak peek

Here's a sneak peek of 2 crafts I did today for the baby's room. I can show a full picture because they both involve the baby's initials and well...we're keeping his name a secret. Not even my mom knows! Neil and I don't even call him by his name to each other because we're afraid we'll slip up in front of people. Lol we'll probably be in such a habit that we'll still call him "the baby" after birth!






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tweezers

I'm in the process of folding a million tiny baby socks. Neil claims he can't help because the socks are so little he'd need tweezers. At least his excuses are funny!


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registry overload

So I've been registering online for baby stuff. Good grief. I'm overloaded and overwhelmed. If anyone has any suggestions on good things to register for, PLEASE let me know.

Muttigrees

There is a program for kids called Muttigrees. It uses dogs to teach kids social skills and help those children who struggle with academics. Such a cute idea and it's gaining national attention. Even Cesar the Dog Whisperer is on board with it. In fact, our dog Scruff, a mutt we found on the side of the road and rescued, may be used as a Muttigree at my school. If they need her, she will be a reading dog and kids with reading problems will read to her. Too precious!

Today, our baby boy received his first Mutigree from Neil's boss and self proclaimed Auntie Judy. Thank you so much!!




Our baby is so blessed to be showered with so much love already.

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Puzzle

Baby boy's first puzzle. Thanks aunt amber!

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A father's touch

I cannot explain how much I love it when Neil asks if he can try and feel the baby move. It is the first of many high fives between father and son. I love my boys so much. I cannot wait to see them together.


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name?

I believe we have a name picked out for sweet baby McKnight. Not telling yet though...gotta let my momma know first! ;) Also, went to the doctor on Tuesday. Heartbeat sounded great and baby and momma are measuring right at the due date. I do, however, look like I have stuck a basketball under my shirt. Fun times. So ready for the next 17 weeks to hurry by. Pictures coming soon...I hope....and a name reveal.

Happy Thursday! 

prayer request

Just found out this morning (thanks to trusty Facebook) that a very pregnant (30 weeks give or take) friend of mine was in a car wreck yesterday. Her car got T-boned on her side by another car going 55 miles per hour. They are keeping her at the hospital to make sure her baby girl Kashleigh is alright. Any prayers would be greatly appreciated. Thank you!!

yay for internet and cable

We finally got our internet and cable hooked up this morning! It's actually been kind of nice not having the distraction of computers and TVs....but....college football is starting soon and I've got to be able to watch that!!

We're still working on getting the house in order. We have so much storage in this house compared to our old house, but we have an extra room that we don't know what to do with! And a bookcase with no home right now. Oh, and a couch that used to be in our office. Ah decisions, decisions. If only Neil and I could agree...

We used to use our 3rd bedroom in the old house as an office, but now we have 4 bedrooms plus a small office off the kitchen so we have extra furniture. But Neil doesn't want to use the extra 4th bedroom in this house as an office or a spare bedroom so we don't know what to do with it. We have an air-conditioned brick garage/storage building that will be used as a "man cave" or whatever Neil wants it for eventually....so we're thinking maybe turn the 4th bedroom into a game room. But then we have to buy stuff to put in the game room. Right now it is holding all the stuff that isn't unpacked yet!

We are loving our new home and feel so blessed! If only it could magically organize itself...

moving day!!

We're closing on our new house tomorrow!! We are very excited, but have lots to do to get ready for it. This afternoon when I get off work, there will be lots of packing going on around here! Thursday we are using a pick up to get boxes and small stuff. Friday we are renting a truck; Neil and his wonderful cousin Garrett will be doing the heavy lifting and moving all the big furniture. I can't lift anything due to my back and being 20 weeks pregnant (eeek!! so excited about that!), but I'm a great supervisor! :)

3 cheers for moving into a new house in Conway!! Hopefully, this is our "forever" home and all my babies will call this house their home. We've made great memories in our current home, but as we are starting a new chapter of our lives it seems only fitting that we start it in a new home. It wasn't planned this way, but God has a wonderful way of having things work out for the best.

sugar and spice or snakes and snails?

Neil and I found out yesterday that we are having a sweet, HEALTHY baby BOY!!!

Dr. M said 100% for sure it's a boy. We've got the proof in our pictures, but I haven't scanned them yet. She also said he was VERY active and actually had trouble looking for the stuff she normally looks for because he wouldn't stop moving! Looks like we're in for some trouble when this little one is born! ;) Dr. M said everything looked great and to keep doing whatever it is that I am doing. The only challenge I'm having is that my left hip continues to slip out of place. It was doing this before pregnancy, but has gotten worse as I've gotten bigger. I went to the chiropractor early this week and my hip was so out of place that my left leg was 1/2 inch shorter than the the right. He put it back in, but I can already tell that it is coming out again. I have a referral to a physical therapist as my insurance benefits for chiropractors have run out for the year. Please pray for this as it causes severe back pain.

Baby boy M looked fantastic! He is 11 ounces which is actually the weight he should be at 21 weeks according to my books. Hope that's not a sign of a big baby, but I won't complain that he's growing. We are beyond ecstatic that the McKnight name will carry on...it was all up to us as Neil is the last McKnight male.

Now comes the challenge of a name. We've got several we like, but want to pray about it to ensure that God doesn't have something else planned for our little one. Oh! We got to see him sucking his little thumb too but didn't get a picture. It was the sweetest thing and he already owns my heart. 

Finding out the gender has made things so much MORE real for us. Neil is feeling much more comfortable that the pregnancy is going well and has given me the green light to start shopping! He was afraid that doing so before the 19/20 week appointment would jinx us. After all we've gone through to have our sweet boy, we didn't want to take any chances.

My sweet, sweet sister-in-law as already bought our baby two books to read: White Fang and Treasure Island. Both written in language for children and she told my mother-in-law that she wants to read them to the baby. Isn't that the most touching thing ever?!

If anyone knows of any cute websites or stores for baby boys, let me know please!!

Thank you for all the prayers and well wishes. Our dreams are coming true and we feel so blessed. Praise the Lord for His faithfulness and love!

150

150...Days to go, that is before Baby M is here. Wow!!!!!  Technically, I will be 40 weeks in 149 days, but they tacked an extra day onto my due date. Not sure why, but who cares?!

Next appointment: July 21st at 3:30. We get to make sure that Baby M is developing okay and hopefully he/she will cooperate so we can find out the sex.

Only about 56 hours to go!!!!

Backyard Find

So this is what Neil found in our backyard tonight.


If you ignore the mess from our packing, you'll see that it is a snakeskin. Neil thinks it is from a chicken snake he found by our koi pond last week. Well really it should be called a frog pond because that's all that is in it but whatever.






If we could stretch it out straight, it would be longer than I am tall. Too cool.

P.S when I asked Neil what to do with it, neither of us had an answer so it's now resting on one of our bar stools. I feel bad throwing it away but definitely don't want to keep it either...

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Things I've noticed

1) It's getting harder to put on my socks and shoes. I sat in the floor tonight to put them on before we went on a walk. I struggled. Definitely not used to that.

2) While getting ready for the aforementioned walk, I put on a pair of shorts I usually walk in. Yeah. Not happening. WAAAAY to tight in the rear area. Happiness went down a little on that one.

3) My VERY inny bellybutton looks like it is going to pop out any day now. Neil might probably hopefully won't be grossed out by this event, but I wouldn't bet on it. This is the thing he's dreaded since trying to get pregnant. I don't really blame him though. It is pretty weird. I'd be grossed out too if his popped out one day.


Have a great week!

18 Weeks

Pregnancy Highlights:

How Far Along: 18 weeks (7/14/11)

Size of baby: Baby McKnight is the size of a sweet potato (approximately 5.6 inches and 6.7 ounces)

What baby is up to this week: The baby is now flexing its arms and legs. Blood vessels are visible through the skin and its ears are in their final position.

Total Weight Gain/Loss: 4 pounds of pregnancy weight and 9 pounds of fertility weight gain. A total of 14 pounds to lose so far.

Maternity Clothes: I can wear lots of my shirts still, but they are just really tight. I wear lots of dresses in this heat.

Gender:  We find out a week from today: July 21 at 3:30!!!

Movement: I felt  the first flutters on July 8, Neil's birthday. I feel them sporadically usually when I am sitting down.

Sleep: Sleeping is great. My back gets sore from sleeping on my side too much and I'm still waking up to use the bathroom. I actually feel like I could use more sleep than I'm getting. Baby is developing yawning and hiccuping skills and is developing its finger prints and toe prints.

What I miss: Not. A. Thing.

Cravings: Milk, coleslaw, and apples

So I just noticed I hadn't done a real baby update since week 11. Wow! What a slacker.

baby stuff

I am overwhelmed with the amount of baby stuff out there. Just looking at cribs today has me frazzled. Do I get the convertible or not? What type of mattress should I get? What color do we want? Then I'm looking at ratings and reviews to make sure the ones I like aren't gonna collapse on the kid. Goodness gracious! I wish I could just show someone what I like and have them make all the decisions. I did that with my wedding and it turned out great! Obviously, I don't do well when I have to make decisions with too many options. I always second-guess myself and feel like I have overlooked something. Give me 2-3 options and I'm good to go...otherwise, I panic.

And now I've realized that in about 5 months, I will be making the decisions (along with Neil) for a long time in this baby's life. Cue the anxiety now. There is so much to decide on and the baby isn't even here yet. It's so strange to know that I will be a guiding force in this baby's life. I have so much confidence in Neil being able to handle it. He is level-headed, controlled, and always thinks things through before acting. Me on the other hand? Well, I'm the emotional, anxiety-ridden, wear my heart and emotions on my sleeve type of girl. Neil and I = complete opposites. Hopefully the baby will be calm like him! :)

Chicken wings

Neil makes the best ones. Happy 4th everyone.


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What we've been doing

Packing. No fun at all. We've got about 4 weeks left until we move and Neil has been a packing machine. I'm helping of course, but he is definitely the motivator. All the clutter of boxes is getting to me. Here's hoping we (I) can make it through the next few weeks without a nervous breakdown from all the boxes!!


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Random thoughts

Random thoughts that aren't connected at all, but at least I'm blogging!

We're taking all the clients to the pool today. Should be fun and mostly exhausting. They love it though and it's not so bad for staff. We have to go to a pool with lifeguards, so we get to drive 35 miles to Marshall, AR but at least it takes some of the pressure off of the staff. Having a kid get hurt would be a major downer.

Neil and my brother went fishing yesterday in Clinton. There is a huge creek/river type thing that they wade/fish. However, they got caught in a major thunderstorm complete with lightening. I was working in Clinton and totally freaking out because I couldn't get in touch with them and just knew they were out there in that lightening. I really dislike lightening. They got home just a few minutes after I did and they were exhausted. Neil took a 3 hour nap afterward and was really sore! Ha.

I've been feeling this hard spot occasionally on the left side of my uterus. Yesterday, I had two of my co-workers and experienced mommys feel it. They are both pretty sure it was the baby. Too cool. On Friday they are going to bring me all of their favorite baby stuff to show me. Fun Times! I've been so overwhelmed with what to get.

I must go wake Neil so he's not late for work. Happy Wednesday! 16 weeks tomorrow!! :)

still here and still pregnant

So I haven't updated about my pregnancy in a while. *sigh* It's been a busy couple of weeks. We are in the full swing of our summer program at work and I'm exhausted when I get home. Being surrounded by at least 25 kids with emotional/behavioral issues plus the heat equals one very tired Lauren when I get home. We are also packing every day...we're moving in 5 weeks! Yipee! I also had a stomach virus, had to shop for new furniture, had to set up new homeowner's insurance, etc, etc. All excuses, but valid. I had an appointment two weeks ago with my OB and need to upload new pictures of baby mcknight and my ever growing belly. I'll do it this week for sure. Anyway, just wanted to let everyone know that all is well around here. Have a happy day!

sweet hugs and yearnings

Today one of my soon-to-be first graders (we'll call him "A") hugged all over me. He is the sweetest child and I'm afraid he has stolen my heart. I would take him home in a heartbeat. But he has a good momma who would really miss him.

He was my shadow all day and kept saying "I just wanna follow you Miss Lauren." He was my "helper" today and didn't leave my side. He even wanted me to take him to his house instead of his dad picking him up because he wanted to show me his pony...named Donkey! Ha. I can't tell you how much I love this little boy.

*sigh* I can't wait to have one of my own. Boy or girl, it doesn't matter. I kinda even want to name my kid after "A." His hugs today made me realize how much I can't wait to be hugged by Baby M.

prayers please

please pray for my blog friend who had an emergency C-section on June 16. Her baby Grady was born at 30 weeks and is at Arkansas Children's Hospital. Please pray for mommy, daddy, and baby Grady. Thank you!!

Growing

I think I can now retire this tank. Don't worry...I wore another shirt over it today. :)




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too much fun in the sun

Yesterday, Neil and I went Lake Degray with my mom, my step-dad Ty, my brother Rob , and his girlfriend Sarah. We had so much fun. I was disappointed I couldn't try the new tubing toy Ty got because mom and Rob had so much fun on it. Next year, I'm totally rocking it. We were exhausted by the time we left. And I had a souvenir....the worst sunburn. EVER. I put on SPF 30 twice during the day, but obviously the sun kicked its butt. I am completely burnt on the front side of my body minus my stomach and face.

It's so bad in fact, that when I tried to get out of bed I literally couldn't. Neil had to pull me up. As soon as my feet hit the floor, I had excruciating pain going up both my legs and I couldn't stand up.  I cried...of course I cried. This immediately brought up the question, "how in the heck am I going to have this baby?" At least I will get something out of that pain.  I've been laying down practically all day. I can walk now, but I'm limping around and can't stand still. If I lay down too long, when I try and stand, my legs seize up and the pain is so intense. I am walking around here like I'm eighty. You know, with a hunch back and limping.

My mom is pretty sure that I have second degree burns. I'll probably have to take off work tomorrow because even thinking of getting out in the sun makes me sick. I am refusing to let Neil touch me. Moral of the story: make sure you put on waterproof sunscreen and reapply about 50 times. This is miserable!!!

Three Things Thursday

1) I do believe we have bought a house! We're going to sign the final contract today! I would show pictures, but some old people live in it right now so it's very difficult to overlook the the old furnishings. I am in love with the circle driveway, the 400 square foot brick storage building in the back and the awesome backyard that I can't wait to play in with our little one. So excited!!

2) We are headed to the lake with my parents and my brother and his girlfriend on Saturday. Neil had the audacity sweetness to suggest that I wear a bikini. Ha! In another lifetime maybe. But so sweet of him. I'll be rocking my tankini and hiding my stomach, but looking forward to getting some sun on my white body.

3) I was thoroughly cussed out like a dog yesterday by a client's father. Mind you, the client was a danger to the other students at school and needed to be hospitalized. Of course, people must think I get some kind of perverse joy out of sending these children to the psychiatric hospital or get paid extra for it. Never could be further from the truth...it's actually a lot more work! After I calmly explained that I would not talk to the father further until he stopped cussing and yelling at me (over the phone), he continued so I hung up on him and called the abuse hotline for medical neglect because the parents would not take him. Thank you karma. The parents were told by a DHS caseworker that they either took the child to the hospital or they would have charges filed against them. Guess what? They took him. Today I'm hoping they don't come to the school. Fingers crossed!

11 weeks

Pregnancy Highlights:

How Far Along: 11 weeks (5/26/11)

Size of baby: Baby McKnight is the size of a lime (approximately 1.6 inches and .25 ounces)

What baby is up to this week: The baby (now about two inches long) has been pretty busy this week, growing hair follicles, fingernails, and ovaries (if she's a girl). She has distinct human characteristics by now, with hands and feet in front of her body, with ears nearly in their final shape, open nasal passages on the tip of her tiny nose, a tongue and palate in the mouth, and visible nipples. Hands and feet have individual fingers and toes (meaning good-bye to those froglike webbed hands and feet) 


Total Weight Gain/Loss: 1 pound of pregnancy weight and 9 pounds of fertility weight gain. A total of 10 pounds to lose so far.

Maternity Clothes: My friend Scarlett gave me lots and lots of maternity clothes!! Lots of jeans, capris, shirts, and dresses. For both summer and winter. I'm so excited!!

Gender:  Very anxious to find out!

Movement: None yet.

Sleep: Sleep is great until I wake up to use the bathroom which occurs every 3 hours give or take. I wake up exhausted every morning, but I am going to sleep very easily.

What I miss: Nothing really except uninterrupted sleep.

Cravings: BBQ and coleslaw.

Symptoms: Fatigue, frequent urination, heartburn, and extreme thirst. I'm still having to take Zofran occasionally for nausea, but I never know when it's going to hit. Also, I tend to feel sick if I eat too much at one time.


Anxiously awaiting our next ultrasound on June 14. My sister-in-law felt my belly yesterday and said "ew gross! It feels like there is a calcium deposit in there!" Too funny. More and more people are realizing I am pregnant, especially at school. It's really fun. Please say a prayer for my friend Brandi. She found out some not so good news at her last doctor's visit and will have to have twice weekly appointments from her on out and she's only 28 weeks along.

Beauty and the Beast

No, I'm not talking about me and Neil. hahaha. My mother-in-law took me and my SIL, Annie, to see the play today at Robinson Center Music Hall. It was wonderful. However, I learned three lessons.

1) I will not be a patient enough mother to spend $50 on a ticket for my two year old who complains the whole time and wants to leave from 15 minutes from the show starting to the end. The poor kid who sat behind me was miserable the whole time.
2) I cannot go 2 hours without being able to have a drink. No drinks allowed inside. I was so thirsty I thought I was going to die by the time we got back to the car and my drink.
3) I can't go 2 hours without using the bathroom either. The line was sooooooo long to use the restroom during intermission that I didn't get to go and I again was about to die by the time a restroom was available to use.

The lessons aside, it was a wonderful day and I enjoyed spending the girl time with my MIL and SIL. They are the greatest!

10 weeks

Pregnancy Highlights:

How Far Along: 10 weeks (5/19/11)

Size of baby: Baby McKnight is the size of a prune (approximately 1.2 inches and .14 ounces)

What baby is up to this week: the tissues and organs are rapidly developing and maturing. Vital organs are starting to function. The baby is swallowing and kicking. Nails are forming on the fingers and toes and peach fuzz is growing on the skin. Limbs can bend and the spinal cord is visible through the skin. 


Total Weight Gain/Loss: 1 pound of pregnancy weight and 9 pounds of fertility weight gain. A total of 10 pounds to lose so far.

Maternity Clothes: No more jeans. They are just too uncomfortable. It is leggings, stretchy pants, or dresses from now on.

Gender:  Very anxious to find out!

Movement: None yet.

Sleep: Sleep is great until I wake up to use the bathroom which occurs every 3 hours give or take. I wake up exhausted every morning, but I am going to sleep very easily.

What I miss: Ribs. I still really want some.

Cravings: Macaroni and cheese. I'm eating some right now actually. So good.

Symptoms: Fatigue, frequent urination, a little heartburn, and extreme thirst.

It's too hard to hide my belly now. I've had several people ask if I'm pregnant and when I confirm it, they say "well, I was wondering but didn't want to say anything." My awesome co-worker is going to let me borrow some maternity clothes and I'm so excited to have them even if I can't wear them all yet.

Thank you for all the prayers and positive thoughts! Next ultrasound is June 14. Please keep the people of Joplin in your prayers. I just can't imagine what they are going through right now.

9 weeks

This is a VERY late post. I was 9 weeks last Thursday (5/12/11). It's been a very crazy week for us. We're trying to buy a house and you know how that goes!

Pregnancy Highlights:

How Far Along: 9 weeks (5/12/11)

Size of baby: Baby McKnight is the size of a green olive.

Total Weight Gain/Loss: No weight gain so far with the pregnancy, but I have about 9 pounds of weight gain since starting fertility treatments.

Maternity Clothes: Just a bella band to hold up my jeans since I can't button them. However, I find this VERY uncomfortable so I mostly wear leggings now.

Gender:  Very anxious to find out!

Movement: None yet.

Sleep: Sleep is great until I wake up to use the bathroom which occurs every 3 hours give or take. I wake up exhausted every morning, but I am going to sleep very easily.

What I miss: Cherry Vanilla Dr. Peppers from Sonic and any type of BBQ. I'm not allowed "smoked meats" so of course I've really been wanting some ribs!

Cravings: Ribs and sausage biscuits. At least I can have one of my cravings!

Symptoms: Fatigue, frequent urination, and extreme thirst! I drink tons of water a day!

We hope and pray every day that our baby is growing and developing as God would see fit. We have had so much support and we are eternally grateful. Thank you so much!

weeks 5 through 8

 Pregnancy belly week by week. Not exactly taken on the exact day that the week changed, but close enough. Luckily, I've only gained one pound (since I last weighed a few days ago). Sleep is not so great due to my very frequent urinating. I've started sleeping with a sleep mask too because I go to bed earlier than Neil and he always wakes me up by turning on the bathroom light--then I can't go back to sleep. Now, problem solved! I think the sight of my stomach is making Neil a little uncomfortable because he was taking my last picture (in the white tank) and said "I don't think you can wear that shirt anymore." Ha! Like I'm just gonna go to work wearing this tank looking like a whale! He's silly! Now that I've had my second ultrasound and we've told everyone we're expecting, I'll start doing weekly updates like I've seen on other blogs.

5 weeks

6 weeks

7 weeks

8 weeks

I'm off to get ready for work. Have a great Tuesday! Love y'all!