Matthew 9:2b

"'Take courage, son; your sins are forgiven.'"

This isn't what the paralytic was looking for, nor those who loved him and went to great lengths to help. They all wanted something "greater". Maybe after hearing Jesus say what He said, they were disappointed, with fallen countenances. On the other hand, those who despised Jesus, while disgusted with His proclamation, were also probably disappointed that He didn't do what the paralytic came to receive. That just reinforced what they already believed about Him, "He's a sham!"

Is He a sham? Do I think like the others when He doesn't give what I want? Which is greater, giving me health, giving me prosperity, giving me fame, or giving me forgiveness?

The next time I'm discouraged Jesus doesn't give me what I want, and maybe even disgusted with what's been granted instead (like an ungrateful child at Christmas-time), may I hearken back to that glorious day Jesus said to me, "Take courage, son; your sins are forgiven."

Genesis 25:50b

"The thing has come from the Lord; we cannot speak to you bad or good."

In my heart of heart, I am a mocker. The "things" that are shared with me as "from the Lord" by others are most often viewed with skepticism. Yet when resonating with Scripture, who am I to "speak... bad or good" of these things? Like Laban with Abraham's servant, I should remain neutral, wait and see what my Lord might do with these words. If they come to pass, then so be it and let me respond in praise. If not, then so be it and let me respond in relief. Either way, the Lord's hand was in it.

The supernatural is always around and about me. Yet I live as if it were something yet to come, in the life hereafter. How is God speaking to me today? Through His written Word? No doubt! But perhaps also through the words of others. May I be ever keen to listen intently to all words spoken directly to me, as if they might be from the Lord Himself. Then let me filter those words through what I know to be Truth, allowing them to eventually play out one way or another.

"Speak to me today, Lord. Allow me to listen, discern and, where real, take to heart."

John 1:42b

"Jesus looked at him and said, 'So you are Simon the son of John? You shall be called Cephas' (which means Peter)."

Jesus' rhetorical question required no rhetoric at all. After all, the King of Kings knows all, therefore there's greater purpose behind his query of Simon. He asks him his name and references his heritage as if He already knows or has heard of him. Of course He knows, but Simon couldn't have known that He knew. This was their first encounter together (or at least Simon's of Jesus). I wonder what Simon thought at that moment. "You know my name? You know my father? And you have the boldness, the audacity to re-name me? Cephas? Who do you think you are?" (Nathanael had similar thoughts, we know because he verbally expressed them, found later in this Chapter of John's Gospel account). I don't know what Simon was thinking, but if I project myself onto him at that moment over 2,000 years ago, that's probably what I would have thought. And yet at the same time I, like Simon, would have been attracted to Him, just like the others.

But why did Jesus ask the question in the first place? He never does (did) anything without a purpose, and never without the goal of directing attention to His Father. I think the reason He asked the question (among others) was to immediately begin to show these men that the impossible was now possible with Him. (cf. Mark 10:27) The whole way these men (and me) thought of life was about to be transformed from the impossible to the possible. Jesus knows all, sees all, experiences all, is all and can accomplish all through Himself in the Father. He also has the right to do all, even the most radical and intimately intrusive of things, like change one's name.

I have a new name written in the Lamb's Book of Life. I don't know what it is, but I know that Jesus has the right to name me whatever He wishes because I am of Him, owned by Him and belong to Him. Regardless of what my name is, I know that's probably something I would never think to name myself. In fact, it may be completely opposite what I might consider. That's the impossible made possible, and that's Jesus turning my world upside down.

May I think of myself (while always thinking of others) through Jesus' lens today. May I live in such a way that I see God doing possible things with the seemingly impossible around me.

John 1:27

"It is He who, coming after me, is preferred before me, whose sandal strap I am not worthy to loose."

Worth. What is it? It's something of value, something of importance and significance to another. If something has worth, it is desired by others, thereby increasing its esteem. But it's almost always relative to something else. In order for something to have worth, it's usually (but not always) compared to something of similar design and purpose so that the one who compares can determine whether the desired item is worth the expense when held up against its competition. This is one fundamental and foundational principle behind the concept of free enterprise and capitalism. I grew up holding these values as dear.

But free enterprise, capitalism and competition have no belonging in Jesus' economy, none whatsoever. My worth is found in Him, but relative to Him it's nothing. If it were not for Him I would have no worth all. This is why John the Baptist could say the things he said about Jesus when comparing himself to Christ. "He must increase, but I must decrease." (John 3:30), by way of example. He had to do this because the throngs thought he might be the Messiah.

A slave was a hired hand that might even be worthy enough to take off his master's sandals/shoes. But John the Baptist? He said his worth was not even that low. It was lower than low.

So rather than focus this passage on me and my worth, what it really does is focus my attention on Him and His worth. And when I take my eyes off of me, then I'm able to see Jesus through a lens that is free of obstructions and distortions.

I do not want to loose His sandal straps. I want to keep my head low, looking at His dirty, pierced and blood-stained feet, worshipping Him prostrate until He reaches down, softly touches my tear-soaked chin with His fingers, and says, "Behold! The Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world!" (John 1:29). Even mine.

Psalm 22:10

"I was cast upon you from birth.

From my mother's womb you have been my God."

Always, always... a reality that always existed, but a word that my mind cannot fully grasp. But that's what I always was to Him, long before there ever was. And that's what I always shall be to Him, long after there is an end. I belong, I am part of, I am from the beginning.

This is grace unmatched because it has no start and it has no finish. I live in the finite, but He is the infinite, and because I'm in Him, then I also share in the infinite.

These truths caused David to rest within the unrestful, to have assurance among the unassuring, and to trust in the wisdom of imminent justice. I must look back to live in the now, and I must also look forward to live in the now. The in between is peacefully fueled by both ends of the continuum.

Psalm 6:2a

"Have mercy on me, O Lord, for I am weak."

One minute the Spirit is full, placing a peaceful and serene estate upon me while basking in the ease of His yoke and the weightlessness of His burden, and the next an overwhelmed load of life all but seems to drown out His presence, comfort and warmth. I am weak, I am fragile, I am vulnerable, I am frail. I need Your mercy Lord, for I am a sinner. Evil is ever before me, and I long to be set free.

Take me to the rock that is higher than I. Allow me to survey the expanse of Your ways, just far enough to trust that my next step will not cause me to stumble. I beg of Thee to shield me from my own self, ever thinking that I am sufficient without You. Keep my weakness ever before me that I may always remember my dependence upon Thee. Then in my awareness, permit me to rejoice that in spite of myself You love, You forgive, You empower, You embrace, and You sustain.

I am nothing without You, I am nothing.