2nd Chemo

The second dose of chemo went well. I'm feeling kind of yucky right now. I have a small headache. I don't feel horrible, but I don't feel well either. But I'll take that over feeling horrible. I'll post more later.

Still doing great

Everyone may be wondering why I haven't written lately. I was thinking, "no news is good news." Unfortunately some people thought that I must be really sick because I haven't written anything for a few days. It was just the opposite. I haven't written anything because nothing has happened. I had a migraine the first day. After that the medicine kept the nausea away and except for being tired I felt fine. I have started a new glutathione supplement that my Aunt and Uncle gave me. It has probably contributed to my feeling better that expected.

Friday I went to my follow up with Dr. Jordan. It was a quick in and out appointment. He signed my quilt, pulled off the tape, checked the incisions and said everything look good. He said that I looked better than he expected after having had chemo 4 days before.

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Today I went to our Stake Conference. Elder L. Tom Perry spoke. I also went to the adult session last night. It was nice to see a few people who hadn't heard yet. I did wear a facemask during the meeting. I don't know how doctors and nurses wear them all the time because they are HOT and uncomfortable. All I could stand was holding one up to my face and taking a breath of fresh air from the bottom when I got too hot. You also don't realize how many people are coughing until you have to pay attention to it. It reminds me of the commercial on TV right now that has the guy who goes to work and keeps coughing and sneezing on everyone. One of his co-workers even calls in an evacuation request to try to get him to go home. The main idea of the commercial is to tell people that you are hurting others rather than helping them when you come to work sick and end up spreading it around. It is better to stay home and keep it to yourself than to miss a few days of work.

The speakers at stake conference were all very good. Elder Perry spoke a little about their meeting when President Monson became the official President of the church. It was amazing to think that we were listening to someone who is 3rd in line to become a future President of our Church. He is such a powerful speaker no matter what he is talking about. He also has a great sense of humor. He brought his 98-year-old mother-in-law to last nights meeting. He was laughing and teasing her from the pulpit. You could just see the love and admiration on his face. It was uplifting to listen and be near such a great man.

Our sweet activity day girls (8 to 11 years old) in our ward made us cookies this week. We also had dinner brought in 3 times and had Shawn's 16th birthday. I told my sister that I am being spoiled and that I could get used to this. I hate deciding what to make for dinner and I don't really like to cook so having everyone else do it for us is really nice. I like to joke about getting used to it but it is also very appreciated when I am tired.

I doubt I will write much this week because most of what is going on is just the day to day stuff of life. I don't have chemo again until the 28th so I doubt I will get worse before then. So far I haven't noticed my hair falling out. I did freak out one of my friends when I wore a hat and scarf the other day. I had just washed my hair and put it in a ponytail. It was really cold out so I put a hat on so that I didn't go outside with wet hair. She thought that my hair had fallen out. We both laughed at that.

Day 2

The mild headache yesterday turned into a full blown migraine. Luckily my nausea medicine kicked in just as the headache was getting worse. By 6:00 I was in bed with all the lights out. My some friends brought us dinner so Dave and kids were taken care of. I made myself eat a little rice and jello which tasted great. Another friend came over and did some reflexology on my feet. That helped also. I ended up going to bed around 8:00. Dave as usual is my superman. He took care of everything. He even rubbed my head until I was able to relax enough to fall asleep. Then he woke me up when it was time to take my next dose of medicine. I wish every woman had a husband as wonderful as mine. He is the greatest blessing that I could ever have.

I think the thing that is going to drive me crazy the most is that I have to stay away from crowds and anyone who is sick. My immune system is very weak so if I have a temperature over 100.5 I have to call the doctor right away. I am going to have to rely on others to stay away from me and my kids if they are sick or if they have been around anyone who is sick. It will be hard for my kids to limit who can come over to play. The nurse said it is up to me if I want to go to church but if I do I will have to wear a mask and stay away from anyone who is sick. This will be a tough call because this weekend is our stake conference and we have L. Tom Perry coming to speak. I really want to go to that. Next weekend Shawn will be made a Priest and the first week in March is my parents mission farewell. It is going to be hard to decide what I can and can't do.

On a lighter note, the sun is finally shinning enough that the snow in our yard is starting to melt. My kids built a snow hill in our front yard after the first few snow storms. David and Tyler built a snow dolphine that same weekend. Two days later it snowed again and covered up the dolphine. Mariah is standing where the dolphine used to be. Then it kept snowing and snowing and snowing. We have more snow in our yard this year than any other year I can remember. The kids also built a snow cave which they had fun collapsing on Saturday. I took the pictues with Mariah after the snow had finally started melting.

Chemo

Well today was C-day, chemo day. Dave stayed home from work so he could take me. We got the kids ready and took them to school then we left for Dr. Gray's office. We arrived a few minutes before 9:00 only to find the office closed. We waited for a few minutes before they were ready to open. Soon there were others arriving for their treatments. The nurses started the other patients first because my treatment would take longer to set up since it was my first time.

I can't remember the name of my nurse right now but she was great. She explained everything she was going to do before she started. I have two prescriptions that I picked up at the pharmacy that are supposed to help with nausea. My chemo is administered to me through my port. Several people have asked me where the port is. The port is the little bump or half ball under my skin. Mariah said it looks like a popper. The boys just said it looks gross. It reminds me of the movie "Alien". It hurt more than I expected when she stuck the needle in. I jumped so she had to do it twice. My hand is still bruised from my surgery. That nurse missed on my hand and had to put it in my wrist. They gave me a new prescription today for some cream that I can put on the port to numb it so that it won't hurt next time.

The first medicine they gave me is called aloxi. Next was decadron. They are both to control nausea. Third was the chemo drug, adriamycin, also known as the Red Devil. It is bright read in color and is very bad for the cancer. It is also the one with most of the side effects. The 4th medicine was cytoxan. I had a 5th medicine as a shot in my arm to keep my blood counts up.

I felt pretty good most of the day. A mild headache was about all until a few minutes ago. I started feeling a little nauseated so I am going to go lay down. I'll write more later.

Friday's Appointment

We received more test results today when we went to our appointment. They were good. The CT, bone scan and echocardiogram were all normal. Everything is set for me to start chemo. We actually could have started today but when Dr. Gray mentioned it I started feeling hot and dizzy. Logically I was okay with starting today but subconsciously I guess I wasn't. We decided to wait until Monday so that Dr. Gray would be around to keep an eye on me. If I am still nausiated even after taking the medicines to prevent it, I can go back in on Tuesday. I will have my second treatment two weeks later.

Last test?

FYI - Apparently the blog wasn't letting anyone make comments. I changed some settings so hopefully you should be able to do that now.

Yesterday I went for what will hopefully be my last test for a while. I had an echocardiogram to get a baseline of my heart before I start chemo. Ruth took me to that test because I wasn't supposed to drive while I am taking pain medication. I haven't been having any pain so I only took a half pill then skipped one. I don't think I will even need any pain medication today.

We have an appointment with Dr. Gray at 12:15 today.

Port

Today was the surgery to put in my port. We had to be at the hospital at 6:00 a.m. Once again it was snowing. Dr. Jordan ended up having to do an emergency apendectomy so they didn't even take me back to the operating room until after 9:15. I don't know why they keep hospital rooms so cold then they give you the thin blankets that don't help much. By the time I left I had 5 of them on me.

The surgery went well. There was music playing in the operating room when I went in. I don't know what it was but all I remember is having a dream similar to something out of the Disney movie Fantasia where the pink elephants are dancing around. The only word I can think to describe it was phsycodelic.

When I got back to my room they finally gave me some water. It tasted so good. I couldn't wait to get home to my own bed to sleep. I ended up sleeping until 2:30. I am a little sore but not too bad. The pain medication is keeping most of the pain away. I am stiff and the area is still numb. It is also harder to write and spell. Good thing I don't have to drive anywhere. I think I will just go back to bed now.

Tests

The results from the lymph node biopsy was "atypical". The Radiologist who reviewed the results recommends that we have the lymph node removed and checked further. It is up to the doctors as to when they remove it/them.

I went in for the CT scan and the bone scan today. The first test started at 8:00 a.m. The kids weren't too excited about having to get up so early. They had to leave for Claudine's house by 7:20, an hour before they normally leave for school. The tests went well. I did have some stomach pain and nausea after. I think it was caused by the gross stuff they have you drink before. Shawn rubbed it in that I had to drink the stuff because he had to do the same test in October. I lucked out and was able to put mine in the fridge. They say that it tastes better cold. The results will hopefully be back in time for my appointment with Dr. Gray on Friday. As of right now I am only scheduled for an appointment on Friday which means I will probably start chemo next week.

My appointment with Dr. Jordan went well. It took longer than we expected. He was running about an hour behind schedule because he was stuck at the hospital. I am scheduled for surgery at 6:00 a.m. tomorrow morning. The surgery should last approximately 45 minutes. I might even be home before the kids leave for school. Ruth will hopefully be able to take the kids to school and my mom will stay with me while Dave goes back to work. I am so grateful that we have friends and family to help keep things as normal as possible for the kids.

Yesterday mom and I went to look for wigs in Salt Lake. We found a cute one at Patty's Wig Wam. I will probably order that one if my hair falls out. We stopped at another store that the insurance thought might have wigs. They didn't have any but the sweet lady there gave me a beautiful pink and black scarf and a bag of candy with the following poem.

Carol's Breast Cancer Survival Kit
A stick of gum - to remind you to stick with it...
A candy hug or two - for when you need one... (One of my friends already gave me a whole bag of hugs.)
A tootsie roll - to remind you to not bite off more than you can chew...
A smartie - to help you on those days when you don't feel so smart...
A starburst - to give you a burst of energy on those days when you don't have any...
A snickers - to remind you to take time out to laugh...
A lifesaver - to remind you that there are many times when you or others need help...
A sweet tart - Remember, there are sweet and tart things in everything we do...
A bag - to keep it all together.

She also told us the the address for the American Cancer Society in Salt Lake. We stopped by there and picked up some more information. They had some wigs that people have donated that you could take for free. There was one in my hair color and long enough that I can have it cut to look better. I have an appointment with my stylist on Friday to see what she can do with it. I can wear it for awhile to see if I can even stand a wig before I spend the money for the one I really like.

There are so many little positive things coming out of this already. When I think about what is going on around me I can see Heavenly Father's hand in setting things up before hand so that they are in place when I need it. One of those things will benefit many more people than me. Two young women in my ward are making "Cancer Cans" for their Young Women's project. The story as I heard it is that they were trying to think about what to do for their projects. One of them thought they should do the cancer cans. The next day they went to church where the Young Women attended Relief Society opening exercises. That was the day that I told everyone that I had cancer. When they went home they knew what they wanted to do. The cancer cans are a can with a blanket and other items, like coloring books for kids, to brighten cancer stricken days. The cans will be donated to Huntsman Cancer Institute and Primary Children's Hospital. They want to make enough to give one to each chemo patient at both hospitals. Each can costs approximately $5. They are asking for either money or gift card donations so that they can either purchase the items or supplies to make the blankets. Let me know if you would like to donate to their project. I will help you get in touch with Camille and Kaitlin. Just one more blessing that is coming out of a bad situation.

Beautiful Quilt

Saturday we went to my parents house supposedly to watch them open their mission call. Well it didn't come but we were still going to get together for dinner. After dinner Kristi came upstairs with a great suprise. She had made me a beautiful quilt. She had a lot of help from family and friends to be able to complete it in the little over 2 weeks that she has known about my cancer. It has the pink breast cancer ribbon in the middle and has words of inspiration quilted all over it. On the back, the people who had helped with the quilt had written messages to me and signed their names. They also gave me a fabric pen so that I can have others sign it also. I look forward to having people sign it and to reading their messages and finding all of the hidden words of inspiration in the quilting. I showed it to the nurses at the Radiologist's office. They liked it so much that they said they want one to hang in the office. I have included two pictures of the quilt and a picture of the flowers from Dave's office.

Long Week

I made an entry on Wednesday but when I went to post it it only saved it as a draft. It is posted now.

Thursday is already a blurr. I spent the day running around doing errands. I called Dr. Gray's office to see if I needed to move my appointment up now that we know that we were going to do chemo first. They said that he wanted to see me on Friday.

Friday was also very busy. David picked me up at 9:45 to go to our appointment with Dr. Gray. Mom met us there. Dr. Gray explained more about what will happen when I start the chemo. I need to have a pick line put in next week. Dr. Rosenthal prefers to have someone else do that so that she can focus all of her time on breast surgeries. The office made me an appointment for Dr. Jordan to put it in. I will talk to him on Tuesday, 2/5/08 and he will put it in on Wednesday 2/6/08.

We also talked with Dr. Gray about participating in a clinical trial. I would still receive the same chemo as I would if I don't participate but I may also receive additional medicines that are approved by the FDA just not for breast cancer that is in my stage. After we left Dr. Gray's office we went over to McKay Dee to meet with the trial coordinator. She gave us a lot of information to read and talked with us a little about the trial. We still need to look at all of the information and see if I even qualify for the study. The main benefit is the extra medicine I would get and they would pay for that medicine. One difference is that I would get the 8 doses of chemo once every 3 weeks instead of once every 2 weeks. This makes it longer overall but it would give me more time to recover in between. If I decide to do the study, the chemo will last for 27 weeks instead of 16. That is almost 7 months instead fo 4. I also don't get to choose which group I am in. There are 6 different groups. Each is different and 3 of the groups get a medicine after surgery once every 3 weeks for 30 weeks. There is so much to consider before we make a decision. We also don't even know if I qualify yet. I would need to have a few different/ additional tests and another biopsy before we start chemo if I decide to participate.

We got home just in time for me to pick up the kids from school then it was more phone calls about medical issues. I had an appointment to meet with Shawn's school councelor at 2:30 to talk about him adding a few more classes for school. That went well. He will start back to art, health, and seminary starting Monday. He still needs to catch up in math now that he has one of the teachers at school to tutor him. She is really good and he likes working with her. Hopefully he will be caught up soon. He is only 1 chapter behind the class but it is a long, difficult chapter.

The hospital called me while we were at the school. The insurance didn't get the preauthorization done for Monday's tests so we had to reschedule them. Monday is now open. I am planning on going to Salt Lake with Mom. Tuesday I will do a CT at 8:00 and the injection for the bone scan at 10:00. Then I rush to Ogden to Dr. Jordans for a quick meeting. Lunch if there is time then back to Layton to do the bone scan. Wednesday is the surgery for the pick line. I probably won't know what time until Tuesday. Thursday is the echo and some blood tests. Friday is Dr. Gray again. I don't know yet if this is just to talk or if he wants me to start chemo. I will check on Monday.

We still don't know the results from Wednesday's biopsy. Hopefully Dr. Chung will call me on Monday.

Some people have asked me how to get in touch with me. You can email me at candytatton@yahoo.com or call and leave a message. My email is also listed at the top of my blog. I am not home much right now but I am sure that that will change once I start chemo. I don't know how much I will feel up to but I will try to get back to people as I can. You can also respond to some of the postings but since nobody has done that yet I am not sure how exactly that works. We have also had many inquires as to if there is anything that we need. Right now I honestly don't know what we need. Prayers are always welcome. Dave and my Mom are going with me to appointments while we are still figuring out what to do. That saves me having to explain to them what happened. Dave then passes on info to his family and Mom passes it on to mine. I am hoping to do the chemo at Dr. Gray's Layton office so that I am close to Dave's work. One of them will probably go with me to my first chemo treatment. After that everything will depend on Dave's work schedule and when my parents receive their mission call and when they have to leave. We are very blessed that Paint Sundries is letting Dave take whatever time he needs. He will need to go back to California for a week at the end of the month. That could change depending on how I am doing. Dave's mother and Helen have also been very helpful. They have been there for the kids a lot. There are many more people who are doing little things to help. It is impossible to thank everyone here. Once again I am not sure what we need or will need. We just ask that if you feel a prompting from the spirit with regards to our family that you listen to it and follow it as you feel appropriate.