Thanking our lucky stars

I've posted the good and the ugly so you gotta know the bad is coming. In the grand scheme of things, this story has a happy ending so I don't know that I should really classify it as bad. We certainly had a memorable Christmas this year.

We left MIL's around six: still some daylight, not too cold - all seemed to bode well for an uneventful drive home. The road was slushy around Litchfield, then seemed to clear up. Just past Darwin - home of the world's largest ball of twine - and about halfway home there's a stretch of road that we now know is windswept resulting in a friction-free surface physics professors would covet for demonstrations. We fishtailed a bit. It seemed that E'Yoak had righted us when suddenly we fishtailed a lot and started a dramatic spin. E'Yoak thinks we did several 360's; I remember approximately 180 degrees before realizing that we were flying sideways toward a mailbox. As it loomed in my window I let out an "oh s****!" that let my dear husband know that recovery would be impossible. We sheared off the post and I watched the mailbox fly about 30 feet away from us. It looked just like a video game. Next thing I knew, we were rolling. It was both extremely fast and super-slow motion. We landed on the tires and while I tried to orient myself, E'Yoak shouted over the Blind Boys of Alabama Christmas album still playing, "are you OK? are you OK? areyouok?areyouok?" I realized that I was and yelled back, "YES, ARE YOU?????" We are.

Four more cars went in the ditch within five minutes and until MNDoT salted 20 minutes later, we heard tires slipping a whole lot.

The passenger side door wouldn't open so after finding my glucose meter still in my bag (everything else in the car had resettled after being shaken like a snowglobe), I followed E'Yoak out his door. He'd called 911 and his brother. Next we called insurance. The sheriff (younger brother of a HS and college friend of E'Yoak's - of course) came so I had the pleasure of talking to the southern belle whom I'm certain has never heard of ice on a road before.

Next, I decided to try to gather the pieces of a baby sweater in progress. I discovered that besides our presents being tossed about, the container of ham had burst open. There was ham EVERYwhere. It was stuck in the handles of the doors, on the floor. Who knows where else? When we needed a pen, all we had to do was look under the pedals because the center console had vomited its contents and they landed around E'Yoak's feet. I discovered that the only shards of anything in the car were pieces of plastic from the mutilated CD cases. Oh, and we found an apple sliced cleanly in half. We don't like to think about what caused it or what else it could have sliced. Despite the fact that, if he'd survived, Loyd would have loved cleaning up the ham, we were, for the first and probably only time, glad he wasn't with us.

While waiting for the tow truck, I silently blessed my family for training me well - my Sorrel boots and down jacket were in the back of the truck and I was happy to slip them on and stay warm. E'Yoak's brother and his BIL came to get us and our shaken (not stirred) stuff. We spent the night with MIL - a nurse - keeping an eye on us and feeding us. She was in full mom mode. E'Yoak spent a sleepless night considering Volvos. I spent it thinking our next dog will be trained to wear the seatbelt harness or to ride in a tied down crate.

In the morning, we rented a car and drove home. Uneventfully. I have a couple of minor bruises turning stunning colors and we no longer have an Xterra, but we are doing fine.

Here's the truck where it landed.



E'Yoak's brother took photos later and said it looked a lot worse in daylight. I kinda thought this was bad enough (especially now that I'm actually looking at the photo and see how much the roof over my head went down - s***!).

Now for the moral of the story: ALWAYS wear your seatbelt! And secure your stuff.

And be safe tonight; I'm wishing for a HAPPY 2008, please.

Wooly Wonderland

For Christmas this year, (among other things) I knit for E'Yoak. I knit him the Koolhaas hat by Jared Flood. The pattern was inspired by the Seattle Public Library, but brought to my mind the British Museum which we thoroughly enjoyed during our trip to London.

An architect can hardly pass up a quick-to-knit hat pattern inspired by architecture. So, I went off to find some appropriate yarn. Malabrigo seemed a good choice. I found a beautiful blue that I thought would be nice with E'yoak's brown jacket. It's intense, but I hoped he'd still be willing to wear it.

I think he's grimacing at my demands during the photo shoot, not the hat itself.

It's all about warm ears at the bus stop, honey. And, no, they won't shove you in a locker for wearing your hat.

The pattern, knit on larger needles than called for, resulted in a much too tall hat. I marked where I should really start decreasing after E'yoak opened the gift and during our drive to his Mom's, I ripped out the decreasing and two repeats of the pattern, reknit the decrease and wove in the final end.

I did bring more knitting with me to occupy the hours of sitting still, visiting with family. On Christmas Eve, I was joined in this activity my MIL's newest foster daughter. Our nephew, I., watched us for a bit and then started asking, "how do you do that?" I demonstrated a couple of stitches and he sat back to watch some more. After a few minutes, he said, "can you teach me how?" I pulled two of the US10 DPN's and the remainder of the Malabrigo out of my bag, cast on, knit a row slowly with him watching and then handed it over. He struggled with the first couple of stitches and then found a groove. He needed help starting each row, but generally figured it out pretty fast. We had to break for dinner, but as soon as he finished eating, he was back to the knitting. When I rejoined him on the couch, he'd knitted about 10 rows. Then, he started to notice when he made a mistake and I helped him straighten them out. Our niece, T, scoffed as only a 15 year old can, "you're knitting?" He turned to her and responded simply, "I. Like. It."

Just before they left for the night, I. ran up and asked if he could take his work off the needles. I said sure, thinking he was going to rewind the ball so I didn't even think of offering to bind off for him. He took the piece with him. mmmm Malabrigo. It's a rather nice bit of yarn to learn on, don't you think?

Late on Christmas day, my BIL's family returned and reported that I. had spent much of Christmas morning teaching his cousins to knit (his other Grandma had cast on for them). Yeah, I pretty much melted into a little puddle. Christmas 2o07 - it's all about spreading the love of knitting.

eta: I almost forgot one more bit of woolen Christmas goodness. E'yoak gave me a Wollmeise gift certificate. squee

Christmas mail

Remember the popcorn box that arrived empty? Well, it seems the automated sorting machines don't like us much either.

As usual, we received a Christmas letter from my great-aunt and -uncle in FL. This year, the envelope looked like this:


The letter inside was in five or six pieces. The check was in three. I used scotch tape to make the letter legible and the check (hopefully) legal. Instead of a hand-written post-it note from our letter carrier, the mangled missive came in a sealed plastic sleeve:

I don't know whether I believe that they care. Maybe if they hadn't taken the popcorn....

READ!

I've been tagged by Elem for a book meme. I (think I) posted a while back how I used to be a reader. I still don't read nearly as much as I used to and I really wish I could figure out how to read and knit at the same time. Until I learn to love garter stitch garments, I don't think that will happen. But, I AM reading a book right now so here goes on the meme:


You have to open the book you’re currently reading on page 161 and read the fifth sentence on the page, then think of 5 bloggers to tag with…

Book I'm reading: The Canon: A Whirligig tour of the Beautiful Basics of Science by Natalie Angier

Quote: "When we think of the dismal history of DDT, we think of springs silenced of birdsong and skies brushed free of bald eagles."

Comment: I'm currently on page 33 - in the Thinking Scientifically chapter. It's going to be a while before I get to Evolutionary Biology. I really don't want to start my adult life over and become a scientist (especially given the idea that by this age, my brain structure is pretty well set), but this book is reminding me how much I love science. It also makes me appreciate my HS Chemistry teacher's refrain, "it's just a story," though I still believe he could have expanded on the idea so I would latch onto it instead of trying (unsuccessfully) to get my dad to let me drop the class. (see p. 19 of The Canon)

Tagging:

1. Peaknit
2. FiG's Mama
3. Lumpyhead's Mom
4. Em
5. Rob

eta: I tagged a lot of moms. LHM pointed out she's read nothing since Ferber - which doesn't seem like the sort of book you pick up because you want to. So, if babies have affected your reading even more than crafting and the internet have cut into mine, I'd like to read about your favorite rather than current selection. Peaknit, you're still on the hook for current.
And, many thanks to Rob who, on his business blog, played along with this. He's a renaissance man, but the blog is that of his publishing company - relevant, but still.... I'm just tickled that he didn't blow it off.
(Geez, I've never edited a post as much as that last paragraph. I'm certain there remain grammatical errors galore, but when you're acutely aware that an author/publisher is reading, you get a little more conscious of the fact that your command of the English language is weakening . Humor me; play along that it was once really strong. That was before I began blogging, of course, so you can't check the facts.)

I is for Insurance

I often feel that I am a slave to my need for health insurance. I don't have much hope that this will change in my lifetime; there seem to be too many people with too much money controlling these things.

Postal Imposed Health Kick

The holidays tend to be a difficult time for us to eat healthy meals. There are piles of snacks in the kitchenettes at work, there are shiny packages of treats winking at us in the store aisles... Add this to the fact that I'm lousy at cooking without a plan and even worse at planning meals and shopping in advance and I have to admit I've eaten a bag of microwave popcorn for "dinner" on more than one evening when E'Yoak has night class.

We always have plenty of this salty temptress around due to the generosity of E'Yoak's uncle who sends us a case every Christmas. There have been years when we've found the treat inedible - sassy salsa popcorn is a waste of a tasty starch; marshmallow (comes with a goo-filled packet to add after popping) should be outlawed. However, we usually get some variation of buttery, salty goodness. This year, we received an empty cardboard box with this Post-it note attached:

No, my mailman, thank YOU for helping me lower my cholesterol this winter. Or not.

How soon is too soon?

I really miss having a dog. I know it's freakin' cold out and walking at 6 am could hurt, but isn't that what Sorrel boots are for? I've started looking at Petfinder (is it torture when you do it to yourself?). I am, for obvious reasons, drawn to all the black lab mixes. But, then I think we should try another sort - so similarities won't trigger unfair comparisons. Today I emailed a link to E'Yoak - a female Greater Swiss Mountain Dog who's about 1 1/2 years old. Loyd picked me at the humane society, so it feels weird to be looking for a canine match online, but.... E'Yoak's reply: "do you want this dog?" I suspect if I had typed back a simple "yes" he would have found a way to get to that shelter ASAP - end of semester assignments and paper grading be damned!

But, I really really miss Loyd. I'm not sure whether it's the right time to bring another dog into our house. I don't know if it's fair to any of us. I don't know if I'm ready. How will I know? Will it be when I can type this sort of post without the tear faucet turning on full blast (not yet)?

H is for Handmade

While tempted, I didn't take the pledge this year. I hate to almost do something. I know I can (and probably will) come close to a lot of our gifts being handmade (though not many by me); I can also guarantee that there will be some Harry & David gift baskets heading out to family far away. So, no pledge for me; I don't need the guilt.

However, the No Coast Craft-o-rama is in full swing! I was there last night helping my friend, Stephanie, and the place was hoppin'! I'm going to have to do my personal shopping early today or there won't be anything left at a few of my favorite vendors. If you're in the Twin Cities, stop by booth H-1 - Lucky Lola Designs - and say hi!

Secret of the Stole: Complete!

I'm not good with word games or medieval history so I don't know the theme, but I did finish the stole on Sunday. I finally took it and my camera to work today in hopes of getting a coworker to help me photograph it in daylight. We managed that, but missed the bit of sunlight this morning. We may try again for artier photos, but these should do as proof of completion:

The beginning

the end.

Thanks for a fun KAL, DK!

ahhhh

There's nothing like a baby falling asleep in your arms to remind you how grateful you are to be an auntly. No photos (didn't want to wake the baby), but let me tell you, it was a great Saturday morning.

On the knitting front, progress is being made. I gifted Dad's birthday socks to him on Thanksgiving. He has reported that they fit perfectly. Mom's been tasked with photographing them on his feet. In the meantime, here's the wrapper I made for them:

I don't know how to offer you "click to enlarge" features (other than to say you could try it), so the tag line at the top is a (not so eloquent) nod to Brenda Dayne. It says: "When it's too cold to go barefoot at the beach, put on some socks." The feet are (from left to right) Mom's, Dad's and my left one.

I finished my Harvest Sock Swap sock. Just need to finish assembling some goodies before I mail the package. I'm thinking that I'll pick up a treat or two at the No Coast Craft-o-rama next weekend and use the full time offered for this swap.

I've started test-knitting for Ms. B. I don't have my tiny circ's from Knit Picks yet, but I couldn't wait any longer so I cast onto 2.5mm Addi Turbos and will just accept that the feet of these will be a bit bigger than intended. It shouldn't really matter for the testing and if they don't fit anyone who will wear them, I'll just reclaim the Wollmeise for myself. See? Win-win!

I've stalled a bit on the "Cardigan for Merry" as that baby's not due until January. There are gifts and assignments that must be finished sooner so I'll be casting on some new things before I return to that project.

Oh, and the Secret of the Stole is blocking now. Photos to follow when it's dry and I find some daylight.

Tchuß!

G is for Grey

(Yes, I always spell it with an e; it looks better to me. Ani, too, it seems.)
I could go into some long analysis of the passages I want to post today and what they mean to me, but instead I'm going to just give you the source and the quote.

from Grey by Ani DiFranco (track 08 on Reckoning, 2001):

"the sky is grey
the sand is grey
and the ocean is grey

and i feel right at home
in this stunning monochrome
alone in my way"

from Animal Dreams by Barbara Kingsolver (pg. 320-321 in my copy):

"The rush of adrenalin had rinsed me clean. I looked hard out the window and understood suddenly that what I saw was full of color. A watercolor wash of summer light lay on the Catalina Mountains. The end of a depression is that clear: it's as if you have been living underwater, but never realized it until you came up for air. I hadn't seen color since I lost Hallie. I thought hard, trying to remember; it seemed unbelievable, but there was none. Almost none. Loyd's green corduroy shirt, and the red flowers and the hummingbird against the brightly lit wall, the moment Emelina said goodbye. And that was all. Before that, the last thing I clearly remembered in color was Santa Rosalia in its infinite shades of brown."

Ok, I lied, a little analysis. Thanks to the poetry of these two women, I am able to acknowledge the feeling of living underwater and to hold on, waiting for the moment when it will lift.

I think I've always been a pretty compassionate person. I'm finding it startling to be sad like I never have been in my life and to realize that I had no clue when I've tried to offer support to others in the past. Now, when I know what this feels like, I don't have the energy to offer anything to anyone else and I'm wondering whether I'll remember how it feels when the clouds blow away.

Again from Animal Dreams (pg. 309) - what do you expect when that's where I got Loyd's name?:

" 'Listen, I know how this is. you don't think you'll live past it. And you don't, really. The person you were is gone. But the half of you that's still alive wakes up one day and takes over again.'
'Why should I look forward to that?'
He turned my hand over. 'I can't answer that.' "

and yet, I do look forward to that. And when it happens, I imagine it will coincide with when we're ready for another dog.

World Diabetes Day

Regardless of appearances, I swear this is not turning into a diabetes blog. What knitting has been accomplished has barely made it to Ravelry, much less gotten a post written about it. Soon... maybe after the AIA-MN convention which oh so conveniently envelopes a deadline. And, yes, I owe you "G." The check is in the mail, as they say. Which really means that I haven't come up with a good G word appropriate to the bloggity Encyclopedia of Me.

That said, it is...

In honor of the blue circle, I thought I'd give you those links I promised in the last Q&A. This is by no means a comprehensive list, just some good resources you might find helpful or interesting that I've bookmarked along the way.

Blogs:
Six Until Me She writes really well and articulates how lows feel as well as how living with the Big D affects her life in a way that makes me realize I'm not alone.
Kassie doesn't post as often, but there's something about her writing style that has me checking back regularly, now that I've started reading D blogs.
Diabetes Mine asked Steve Jobs to design a pump. Someone else is trying to meet her demands. I hope they get there. I'll keep checking in.

Excellent Resource for pumpers and their loved ones (it was invaluable while "shopping" for my pump and when I started. I have to admit I haven't been back for a few years):
Insulin Pumpers

Official-y Links (not actually bookmarked on my browser):
The American Diabetes Association
Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation
World Diabetes Day
Diabetes Health (I get the e-newsletter)

Happy WDD and thanks for being part of my support network (oh, is that what the blue circle is about????)!

The Big D Q&A, part 2

Remember the fine print from last time? It still applies. I did not become an MD over the weekend. If you suspect you have diabetes, see your doctor! If you have it, feel free to use this discussion to develop questions for your endocrinologist, but don't rely on my experience to be right for you.

5: Can many people maintain by changing their diet - or is insulin inevitable in many cases?
A: There are two primary types of diabetes. Type 1 (aka insulin-dependent, formerly known as juvenile onset) is the kind I have. It is an autoimmune disease in which your immune system attacks the Beta cells in your pancreas (the cells responsible for insulin production). Because of this, your body cannot make its own insulin and you must inject it.
Type 2 (formerly known as adult onset) is a condition in which your body can't efficiently use the insulin it makes and/or doesn't make as much as you need. You may hear this referred to as insulin resistance. Diet and exercise can be effective tools in maintaining healthy blood sugar levels, but they're often not enough. Oral medications are available for Type 2's; these boost your ability to use the insulin you've got. Some Type 2's do need to inject insulin. Gestational diabetes is more like Type 2, but insulin seems more likely to be used due to concern for both fetus and mother. It typically goes away after birth, but the chances of the mother developing Type 2 later are elevated. (I don't know the statistics so I'm not going to give you any numbers. Try your favorite search engine if you need percentages to be happy.)

6:Do you think you're actually a healthier person due to the disease? (I ask this as a beer-swilling, McMuffin-eating lout who weighs more than she should, but when I'm forced to make better choices - i.e. when I'm pregnant - I do.) I think of your lifestyle as pretty healthy, would that be the case even if you weren't living with diabetes?
A: I might be. I don't feel like I make the best choices all the time, but due to the fact that I think about each one, I probably make more good choices than I give myself credit for. Exercise is always a big challenge for me; I'm still trying to find a way to make it a habit instead of an occasional activity.

7: How does diabetes influence your reproductive choices?
A: Steel Magnolias was set in the 1950's. Diabetes no longer means you shouldn't/can't have a healthy pregnancy & baby. But, there are risks. And, being over 35 has another set of risks (that gets riskier every year). We haven't made a decision about whether we want to be parents yet. If we decide we want to, adoption will be a seriously considered option. But, I'm also trying to get my A1c (a blood test that tells you your average blood sugar over the past 6ish weeks) to a recommended pre-pregnancy level. IF we decide to try to have a baby the old-fashioned way, I'll be ready and the risk of birth defects will be significantly lower. If we decide not to, a lower A1c is good for me.


8: What is your greatest fear about diabetes?
A: going blind. There are a whole bunch of complications that motivate me to keep my blood sugar in the best control I can, but loosing my sight is my big scary. I also fear losing my health insurance.

9: What do you do with the pump when you are in a bathing suit?
A: Best swimwear invention ever: the tankini - all the convenience of a two-piece, with the respect for modesty of a one-piece. Lands End has been good to me. Since I selected a waterproof pump, I just clip it to my tankini bottom, tuck the tubing in, tug down the top to sort of cover the pump and go.

10: Have you ever had to scrap an outfit because of the pump?
A: I don't think so. There are times when I have to choose between keeping the pump easily accessible and maintaining a nice line of my outfit. There are accessories that allow me to wear my pump in a band around my calf (works great with slacks or my wedding dress) or my thigh (mediocre, but good for summer parties - I need to work on perfecting the design to fit me better). With a sleeveless dress, I sometimes clip the pump under my arm.

I've got some links for you, but I think I'll save those for another Diabetes Awareness Month post. If you have more questions, fire away! Thanks Lumpyhead's Mom, Peaknit and Em for these great 10!

Harvest Sock mishap

Last night, around 9 I ran out of reinforcing yarn for a pair of gift socks I'm knitting. I am at the beginning of the second toe. I should be done now, but I have to wait for Borealis to open at noon so I can get more.

So, I decided to start swatching for my Harvest Sock Swap sock. My typical 0's were obviously too small. I started magic looping on 1's. This morning, I looked at the pattern again. It calls for Sport Weight. The perfect yarn I bought is not sport weight. *&$^ Back to the internet for a new pattern.... Apparently "Autumn Equinox" was not the perfect pattern for a harvest sock swap after all. Sigh.

(Peaknit, is your luck with this swap contagious?)

The Big D Q&A

Thanks for the questions, I've got answers. The fine print: Please remember, these are answers about ME. There may be some universal truths in these answers, but they are not sound medical advice. If you have diabetes, you need an endocrinologist (mine's FABULOUS (for me)).

What were your symptoms/diagnosis?
A: While working as a nanny on a fishing boat in SE Alaska, I started to notice that I was always thirsty and constantly needed to pee, the most common symptoms of uncontrolled high blood sugar. I did my best to ignore these problems because there really wasn't anything I could do about it floating in the middle of the ocean. Plus, I didn't know what it meant. I got home, we went to a wedding, my dad started noticing how much I was drinking (no, not alcohol) and that I needed naps like I never used to. He asked what else was wrong and diagnosed me immediately. Being a dad, not a doctor, though, he suggested it could be a bladder infection and told me to go see a dr. before heading off to my sophomore year of college. They did a simple blood test and checked me into the hospital for almost a week. Learning to give myself shots was really hard until one nurse realized that the dart analogy wasn't working (didn't your parents teach you NOT to through them at yourself or other people?) I was in the hospital a little under a week and then moved a couple hundred miles away and back into the dorm. I'm sure this caused my mother a great deal of stress, but getting right into real life was important to my integration of self-care.

2: What advice would you give to some who has been newly diagnosed with the disease?
A: As noted above, I think it's good to integrate the Big D into your life quickly. Don't wallow. Don't ignore everything else and just do diabetes. For the rest of your life, it's going to be there, impacting every decision you make. You might as well get used to it being a part of "normal" even though normal will be very different. At the beginning, I was very diligent about writing down every dose of insulin and everything I ate. Part of this was because I didn't know anything about portions or carb counting (though that's not what was prescribed when I was diagnosed it is sort of what I was doing). I even carried a little scale to the cafeteria with me so I could know how much I was eating. Yes, I was known as "the girl with the scale," but I wasn't shunned for it. I had great friends who acted like it wasn't weird at all.
I also think it's important to find a good endocrinologist who can motivate you. Every person is motivated differently and I am sure there are doctors out there for each of us. I finally found the right one and when I did, I realized how important that is. If you're just diagnosed, I think this is the most important piece of advice I can give you. If you're in a small town and don't have options, you should still see your dr. regularly, but you may need to work harder to find support to keep you on top of your self-care. The internet can help, but there's nothing like a quarterly doctor's appt. to refocus me.

3: What products do you use/recommend, and which did you use and hate?
A: I use an Animas IR1200 insulin pump and Lifescan's OneTouch Ultra 2 blood glucose meter. My biggest frustration at the moment is that the software that comes with my pump works with other OneTouch meters, but not this one (despite the fact that these companies are now one). They assure me they're working on it, but I got the Ultra 2 because my Ultra Smart quick working right and they offered me two Ultra 2's (so I'd have a back-up in Europe) since I really didn't use all the Ultra Smart's features. I ended up using the case from the Ultra Smart because I like the neoprene better than the nylon of the (smaller) Ultra 2's case. Picky, I know.
I use the Comfort infusion sets. They're low-tech, but they work fine for me.
The biggest thing is to make sure your insurance covers the supplies you're going to use. I have had to switch meters in the past when my insurance dropped that company's strips from their formulary. (pain in the a$$.)
For emergency sugar (to treat acute hypoglycemia), I carry candy and I mix up what kind. I prefer ones that allow me to easily get approx. 15 g of carbs quickly. So, 4 Starbursts for example, is better than some fraction of a full-sized candy bar. A Fun-size pack of M&Ms is ok, but buying a 1 lb. bag means being coherent enough to count to high numbers when feeling pretty foggy - not helpful. I HATE glucose tablets. I don't like glucose gel any better. Gross! Gagging while treating a low is not good.

4: What do you think the is the biggest limitation diabetes places on your life? How does it influence your habits?
A: I'll probably never go SCUBA diving (not a big problem in landlocked MN). I can't be a commercial pilot. Honestly, I'm not a huge physical risk-taker so I'm not convinced it's diabetes that keeps me from those things and I never wanted to be a pilot. There are plenty of people who are able to do anything they want, with extra precautions. I did skip the Turkish Baths in Istanbul this time because I was unsure of security for my pump if I disconnected and didn't really want to explain my infusion set to a burly woman with a big loofah who probably couldn't speak English. The pump gives me so much more freedom, but it also makes me think twice about certain situations because it makes it harder to keep the diabetes invisible (when I want to).
I do wonder sometimes how much I could do if a great deal of my brain weren't constantly doing math to calculate insulin:carb ratios, checking in with each cell in my body to see if I'm feeling low or high, deciding what to eat, when to eat, remembering to bring everything with me for however long I expect to be out. I wonder if diabetes uses 2% of the 10% of my brain that I, as a human, know how to use. Or, did diabetes engage an extra, unemployed 2% of my brain?
As for habits... I don't know. I don't smoke, but I never had any interest in that anyway. I don't drink a lot, but I've always been happy with a glass or two of wine with dinner. I'm no better at getting exercise than anyone I know (worse than many, in fact). Perhaps diabetes has impacted my habits, but having had it for 17 years, I don't realize that it's the diabetes, not just my personality. Perhaps with the big D, full assimilation is inevitable.

This post is getting really long! See what happens when you get me going? I have many more questions to answer, but I will hold them for another post in a day or two. No need to lose you halfway through when the question you sent is still coming.

A little knitting content

I am staying on pace with the Secret of the Stole project. Here it is, through Hint #4. I may still add a lengthening repeat before I start #5....

See? Beads! (I keep getting tempted to add more, but I'm sticking with the design as is.)

It's too long for one panel of my "blocking board"!

Zoomed in on the more recent work.
When it's finished and blocked it's going to be gorgeous.
Now it's just kinda pretty.

I finished knitting and felting "Amanda's Squatty Sidekick" awhile ago, but I needed a button. I finally got myself over to Treadle Yard Goods and found just the right thing. So, I'm calling it done (and I've even used it)!



Ok, it might not be done done. I've always had trouble with getting things to felt just the right amount. This one didn't felt quite enough, but I didn't really want it to get smaller (and I wanted it to be done). So, the bag doesn't hold its shape very well (in the photo above, I stuffed it with a dish towel). I'm thinking about making a Timtex "pillow" for the bottom to help it a bit. I might even sew it in to see if I can get the curves this bag could have to actually show up. Regardless, it's a cute (in a good way) design and holds an amazing amount for such a little thing. This is important for one who must always always always carry her blood glucose monitor and emergency candy with her. Which brings me to a little announcement....

Tomorrow (or sometime this weekend), I will be posting the first Big D Q&A. I figure November being Diabetes Awareness Month means it's time to answer your questions. I've noted the few that were in comments or emails, but you have another day (or two) to get me more questions for round one!

F is for ...

The first thing that came to mind for this installment of the encyclopedia was one choice four-letter word. This is the extent of my ability to articulate my feelings about this week: fuck.

But, you know, F stands for some other words, too. For instance, it stands for Family and Friends, both of which we were reminded that we have in abundance. Turns out it can be a little disorienting to feel that you've lost a great love from your life and be bolstered by so much love from so many directions all at the same time. To feel gratitude at the same time as anger, sorrow, self-loathing.... is a very strange sensation. There's a big emptiness that I don't think will ever be filled and, honestly, I don't want it to be. But it will shrink and that is good and knowing that is why I am able to let the sad wash over me. I know it won't crush me because my friends and family keep sending us love and funny memories of Loyd.

My best woman, D, sent us a poem she wrote to Loyd. She claims not to be terribly creative so attributes this to a great muse. I can't argue about the muse. With her permission, a glimpse at our pup's life:

loyd

he was big
he was black
he was naughty
he talked back

he was cute
he was sweet
he was a big dog
on his feet

favorite pastimes
he had a few
on tennis balls
he loved to chew

at the park
he’d find his pack
they’d run and run
and not look back

with the coyotes
he liked to play
through the woods
they’d hunt all day

he was cute
he was sweet
bags of sugar
he did eat

he was big
he was black
on his leash
he pulled off track

for all these things
and so much more
we loved you loyd
though you did snore

say goodbye
we have to do
to you dear loyd
we bid adieu

on your journey
go with peace
find your pack
and don’t look back

loyd

Adios, El Diablo

Last night, we said good-bye to the greatest dog I've ever known (no disrespect to the others I've met). My eyes are puffy and I have no words to describe the loss. So, I offer you some pictures from a happy winter day with a considerably younger Loyd.

Thank you for a hell of a decade, sweet pup.

Sprinting

I'm posting a lot of little posts tonight. Tomorrow, I'm leaving town for a few days to lead a Minnesota Design Team visit. I don't know what kind of internet access or time I'll have so I have to do a little sprinting ahead (and catching up) tonight.

I finished Hint 2 of the Secret of the Stole on Sunday night. I really like it so far. Sadly, rain has made photographing it hard, but here's a shot. I promise nicer photos as it progresses.
I am using Knit Picks' Shadow in vineyard heather and some purple metallic lined beads (so they're a bit lighter than the yarn color). You can't see the beads in this photo, but they are there!

Today, I received my October Ruby-Sapphire Sock club package. It's a really pretty yarn and they sent 5" size 0 dpns - I've been wanting to try 5" so getting them in my favorite size is awesome.
I also received my Fratello kit from Yarnissima. (yippee!!!!) Photos of both (and links) to follow next week.

E is for Enough

"just when you think that you've got enough
enough grows
and everywhere that you go in life
enough knows
..."
- from up up up up up up by Ani DiFranco.

Read the whole lyric here. It's a great one.

Quidditch, Round 3

1. What was the name of the book Dumbledore left for Hermione in his will?
a. The Tales of Beedle the Bard
b. The Tales of Bard and Beedle
c. The Stories of Beedle and Bard
d. The Adventures of Beedle and Bard

2. Whose sign was on Xenophilius Lovegood's chest?
a. The Dark Mark
b. Gregovitch
c. Rowena Ravenclaw
d. Grindewald

3. Was October 30, 1980 the night that Lilly and James Potter died?
a. Yes
b. No

4. What's another name for the Elder Wand?
a. Deathstick
b. Stick of Destiny
c. Deathwand
c. Wand of Death

5. Whose Potterwatch code name was 'Rodent'?
a. George
b. Lee
c. Arthur
d. Fred

6. What was so special about the peacocks at the Malfoy Manor?
a. They were all black
b. They weren't peacocks at all
c. They were twice as big as normal peacocks
d. They were all white

7. Who does Harry say was "probably the bravest man I knew?"
a. Snape
b. Neville
c. Dumbledore
d. Lupin

8. What thing was Lockhart giving Hagrid advice about getting out of a well?
a. Hinkypunks
b. Kelpies
c. Grindylows
d. Flesh Eating Slugs

9. What was the occupation of Colin Creevey's father?
a. Mailman
b. Fireman
c. Bus Driver
d. Milkman

10. Which Professor of Hogwarts was a dueling champion when he was young?
a. Flintwick
b. Dumbledore
c. Snape
d. Lockhart

Picture Scavenger Hunt
You can either post these pictures on your blog or provide a link to where they can be found.

Bertie Botts Beans
Jelly Slugs
Chocolate Frogs
Blood Pops
Jenean's first HSKS kit
(Bonus Point: Who made the kit?)
Ansley

Mixing it up

There have been a few changes over there in the side bar. I'd offer a prize for noticing what they are, but I've overextended myself in the crafty gift category lately so you'd have to wait 3-6 months to get anything from me. You can play anyway, if you like.

Last weekend, we went to visit my parents. There were weavers in town, doing a talk/demonstration at the shop and Mom wanted some backup in case the place got mobbed. It didn't, but there were quite a few people there for the talk. It was really good. Creating 95 shades from one sort of bug (cochineal) with non-toxic, natural mordants by varying pH and temperature gets me excited.

The big highlight of the weekend, though, was meeting Peaknit at long last. We've been commenting on each other's blogs, then emailing, etc. since I was still in Vienna. It was about time we met. You can read her perspective here. All I have to say is that when you meet someone in person for the first time and converse non-stop for three hours (only stopping because one of you has an appointment and the other feels a little guilty for babbling on and taking up your whole day) you know you found a true friend. Now I just need to cast on Firestarter so I don't keep letting down her KAL.

Quidditch, Round 2

1. In Deathly Hallows what does Harry step on when exiting his room to wash his cut?
a. A small figurine
b. A saucer
c. A teacup
d. A coffee cup

2. Which two members of the Order of Phoenix came to escrot the Dursleys to a safe place?
a. Arthur Weasley and Kingsley Shacklebolt
b. Dedalus Diggle and Hestia Jones
c. Dedalus Diggle and Kingsley Shacklebolt
d. Arthur Weasley ad Hestia Jones

3. In order to throw off the Death Eaters, several of Harry's friends take Polyjuice Potion to resemble him and each Harry goes with a different member of the Order of the Phoenix to a different location. Where do Ron (disguised as Harry) and Tonks go?
a. Aunti Muriel's house
b. Tonks' parent's house
c. Kingsley's house
d. Mad-Eye Moody's house

4. At Bill and Fleur's wedding, Harry must disguise himself by taking Polyjuice Potion and takes on the appearnce of a redheaded Muggle boy from Ottery St. Catchpol. He was introduced to wedding guests as Cousin . . .
a. Jimmy
b. Davy
c. Barny
d. Willy

5. Kingsley sends a message via Patronus to warn the Weasleys and wedding guests of the coming Death Eaters. What form does his Patronus take?
a. A German shepherd
b. A lynx
c. A bobcat
d. A coyote

6. In the Half-Blood Prince what drink does Romilda Vane try to give Harry?
a. Pumpkin Juice
b. Elf-Made Wine
c. Butterbeer
d. Gillywater

7. What is the name of the person that heads the Holyhead Harpies?
a. Gwenog Jones
b. Glen Jones
c. Gwenog Smith
d. Glen Smith

8. What tatoo is Harry reported to have on his chest?
a. Blast Ended Skrewt
b. Hippogriff
c. Unicorn
d. Mermaid

9. What color robes do the staff at Weasley's shop wear?
a. Buttercup
b. Magenta
c. Royal Blue
d. Aqua

10. Where do Nicolas Flamel and his wife Perenelle live?
a. Kent
b. Surrey
c. Manchester
d. Devon

Picture Scavenger Hunt
You can either post these pictures on your blog or provide a link to where the pictures are located. I opted for links this time.

A Gryffindor Quidditch Uniform Link
(I like this one because I think there are hand-knit components.)

A Hufflepuff Quidditch Uniform Link

A Ravenclaw Quidditch Uniform Link

A Slytherin Quidditch Uniform Link

A Picture of the Room of Requirement Link

Swap update

I think I'm required to post progress by Tuesday for one of my swaps, so here's what's been going on in that department.

For the Harvest Sock Swap, I've procured a pattern, found inspiration in a poem and ordered yarn. My pal's preferences forced me to abandon my original (pre-pairing) ideas, but this will be an even better package.

For HSKS3, I sewed the project bag this weekend, but need one piece of hardware to complete it. Then, I'll be able to box everything up and send it on its way West. I hope to get it out by the end of the week. Here's a sneak peek:



I received my HSKS package a while ago. Cynthia spoiled me rotten. Check out my haul:






I'm off to nurse my aching shoulders, arms, and sides. I had my first swimming lesson in 26 years tonight. I'm not sure I'll be able to move tomorrow.

p.s: Don't forget to send my your diabetes questions. It's not much of a Q&A without Q's....

D is for Diabetes, type 1

I wanted this post to be "D is for Daliahs" but I forgot to take a photo of my grandmother's HUGE blooms in July. It's hard to write a post like that with no illustration.

So, instead you get personal health in what looks to be a very long post. I don't write about the big D much here. One hint is all I can remember (and I can hardly blame you if you missed it there). So while planning this post, I thought about why that is and I've come up with a few reasons.

One part is that diabetes is so completely integrated into my life that it's not newsworthy. It's constantly consuming some percentage of my brain power, but even when things aren't going great, there's not a lot of drama. I suppose I (we) should just be grateful that I don't have low blood sugar induced emergency room visits to write about.

Another part is that I like to keep the well-meaning diabetes police at bay. I don't need anyone telling me how their (insert distant relative here) lost their leg to diabetes. I don't need anyone asking me whether I should be eating that cookie (after I've already done the equivalent of a 10-page analysis in my head, decided yes, taken insulin to cover it and moved on to the next set of mathematics required by bigD). And, I don't want anyone to think of me as "that diabetic." I am a whole lot of things and while diabetic is one of them and probably has more influence on who I am than I'd like to give it credit for, it's not what I want to be known for. And I certainly don't want to be "that poor diabetic." I'm telling you a lot in this post. I am not asking for sympathy or pity.

Another part is that I don't share it well. I was diagnosed at on September 18, 1990 at 19 yrs old. I spent a week in the hospital and then moved back to the dorm for my sophomore year of college. It was wholly my responsibility to figure out my self-care. My friends in the dorm were really supportive of my required healthy snacks (or NPMUs = nutritional pick me ups, because Jen hated the word "snack") and the fact that I carried a scale and notebook to every meal that first quarter. I don't want to diminish the importance of a good circle of friends, but they weren't taking care of the diabetes, nor should they have. This set the pattern for me, I suppose. It's mine and mine alone to deal with (yes, I have some degree of this attitude in everything I do which is likely very hard on E'Yoak).

When E'Yoak and I got engaged, I asked my (FABULOUS) endocrinologist for advise/reading material for couples merging lives when D is already a factor for one of you. There isn't anything out there. There are pamphlets addressing "you/your spouse has just been diagnosed" which I took so he'd understand a little about what it means medically. What I wanted though, was something more like a step-parenting guide that also addresses what/how the birth parent in the relationship needs to let go. Right. You probably see why this doesn't exist: I can't even explain it well. The diabetes educators asked me to consider writing the book with E'Yoak. Hah. That would require me to figure out how to share it with him. It hasn't happened yet. (If we have a break-through, though, I hope I'll remember to take some notes.)

I am not, however, averse to answering questions about my diabetes. In fact, I kind of enjoy it. I like helping people understand it better and it makes me feel good when someone makes an effort to understand (not to pity or worry (though that sometimes comes with it, I know), simply to try to "get it."). So, you've had the giant preamble. The information desk is now open to take your questions. If you're wondering something, post a comment and I'll put together a Q&A post soon. Deal?

p.s. I need to give a shout-out to a certain friend who somehow found the right balance (for me) of checking on my well-being without intruding or nagging. He even figured out how to ask me if I'm ok when my eyes go dull (I think that's what he notices when I'm going low) so I go test instead of thinking it's just polite conversation. TY.

Happy Anniversary +1 day

Yesterday was our 3rd anniversary. The wedding seems like it was yesterday, but as Mom said last weekend, it seems like we've been married forever (in a good way). So, today I thought I'd give you the story of how we met. If you were there in '04, you read this in the program. If you've met me since then, here you go.....

Note: the photos in this post were taken by the oh-so-talented David Kern. Don't even think about stealing them. Thank you.

ElectricYoak and Auntly H Meet

-and abbreviated tale-

Em: "Does he like dogs? Auntly H has a dog."
Lumpyhead's Mom (LHM): "E'Yoak likes big dogs. She doesn't have a yippy little thing she carries in her purse, does she?"
Em: "Auntly H has a big dog named Loyd."

Unbeknownst to E'Yoak and Auntly H, thus began their fine romance.

Em was best of friends with Auntly H when they were six. Their friendship was renewed during college, despite years with no knowledge of each other's location and miles between them. Em's mother, the postal service, and email helped them reclaim their true friendship.

LHM was friends with E'Yoak from their days working together for then-Congressman David Minge (the honorable judge who presided over a wonderful ceremony 3 yrs ago) in Washington, DC. The friendship of two small-town kids solidified in the big city.

Em and LHM were sorority sisters at Yale. Other than a brief introduction of Auntly H and LHM at Em's wedding ten years ago, each had no first-hand knowledge of the other's dear friend. However, they both have reputations of being excellent judges of character.

So, shortly after E'Yoak moved to St. Paul in 2002, these two decided that he should meet Auntly H. He'd make a new friend after several years in DC and Auntly H could add a friend to her circle from which many had moved across the Atlantic. Of course, there was "no pressure."

E'Yoak and Auntly H spent that sumer and fall exploring cultural events and restaurants in the Twin Cities, enjoying his cooking and her home-made cinnamon ice cream. Somewhere along the way, they fell in love. It might have been the ice cream, but it never would have happened without the intervention of some really terrific friends, including a dog named Loyd.


Thanks for being such a great family, my dears. Here's to many, many more together!

beach

I spent last weekend on the beach with my parents. We also attended my cousin's wedding. It was a good weekend of family time. Sadly, I'm flattened by a cold now. But, here are some crashing waves for your enjoyment.

C is for Club, Supper (or Cooking) and Color

Last month, I hosted our Supper Club. This is a group of 6 who like to cook and try new things. The "rules" are: the host picks a theme, everyone signs up for a course and brings it over for a big dinner together once a month. Sometimes the theme is an ingredient, sometimes a cuisine, sometimes a format (ie: stackable, finger food, or on a stick). To our amazement, the meals always come together really well. For our August meeting, I pushed us a bit. Each member was to select a course and a color (from ROY G BIV). Flavor-wise, I'm not sure it pulled together as well as some of our meals, but it was a lot of fun and everything tasted really good.

We started with Orange Blossoms for cocktails

and green appetizers

Fiery Flank Steak with Tomato Jam was our red main

Italian stuffed Summer vegetables took care of yellow veg. side

Wild Rice with Blueberries and other delicious secret ingredients
comprised our blue starchy side

It all looked nice together on our blue plates.

Dessert was violet - Blueberry Lime Granita...

left blueberry skins on our tongues!

That same week, The Dining Room had "Colors of August" as the menu theme. I guess the ocean doesn't really separate good ideas. Prost, Angelika!