Now, let's round it all up.

It is undenialbly common for people to finally come to a standing and look back on an auspicious or an eventful year. 2007 held many new surprises and experiences.

Regardless of what had happened, like I had mention, I could either hate God for allowing those circumstances to happen or thank God for allow me to experience such happenings. On the neutral side, this year has been one hell of a year. That didn't sound too neutral? Wait till you hear from the negative side. But why stay bitter? Why complain? Why sulk and cry over split milk?

Though I had a good start to they year, arrived back from Japan early in the year to began college the following day and beggining the whole new chapter of life. College, would be a whole new step. Looking back now, I honestly can't say I've gotten to love college. I didn't adapt too fast, I didn't really hang out with college mates after schooling hours, though we had some good moments in KL and Subang Square. But as a whole, it took me a year to get close to some people. Finally I can say I'm actually getting use to it. Studies plunged after the second semester. Still bitter over Calculus II~ Urgh~ Haha. But I'm thankful for the opprtunities that came my way. Had favour with most of my lecturers and really good classmates most of the times. Hmmm. Thinking about it now, everything didn't turn out too bad for college [=

Church was, weird, this year. I shall not dare to speak my mind here to not offend anyone, but it was certain that it was a transition year for me from High school to College, so therefore, changes had to happen. I have much to elaborate, but allow me to beat around the bush. I didn't serve much this year. Surprisingly, if some of you remembered, I had a concert to lead this year. Yeap, it was this year. But right after that, I took the jump and stayed in my hole. I wanted to get out, but people kept stepping on my head. I shall not go on further, but weird is good to explain church this year =P

Friends? Gosh. This I don't even dare to beat around the bush. So many things happened between so many different group of friends. But like how I'd mentioned sometime back, I somehow tend to screw good friendships and good times. This, I put the blame on myself. From seing a whole little of high school friends, to staying away from others, to hiding, I've done it all. Conflicts just put my in a turmoil. Mum says these kinda friendship problems can affect my studies at this age. And yes, it did so. Badly. Sad but true. I still remembered how things affected me last year for the SPM and it had to repeat this year. Just not with the same people. See how I screw things up every year? Haha. Looking forward to more next year. Gosh! Haha. Just joking. I heart my friends, seriously. Its just, I'm weird. Sigh =\

My Family did fine this year. At least I think so. Don't remember any big fights or whatsoever. Don't feel like further elaborating. =]

Accomplishments? It depends. But I did some travelling this year. Was in Japan in the beginning of the year. Got over to Tioman for Chinese New Year. Then popped by Singapore and Perth in May. Jiggled in Jakarta in July and thats quite it. Got really familiar with KL roads this year too. Frequent KL for Jazz gigs. Oh! One of the highlights was singing in Alexis with Janice. That was good. So fun. Hmmm. Need to make plans for my own gig one day! Lolz!

You know, now really looking back, I've really grown this year [DUH~]. Hmm. Yeah, you know what, I'm thankful for the year. Now its time to step up higher and move on to greater things that are ahead of me. Much greater things, I know. This time, I want to include God in my plans. No no, I want Him to include me in His plans ;)

Sayonara 2007, and Ohio 2008!

AKEMASHITE OMEDETO GOZAIMASU!

-jOhN "singing a NEW tune" LiM-

:=:=: MerrY ChrisTmaS with much Love :=:=:

Christmas. And here I am, all woobly and frail. Caught the flu whilst Ps. Vincent was preaching on the first night of Indescribable only to suffer the next few days. Thank God I didnt screw much notes up there. Only just a few too noticable to the naked ear. Credits to Daniel for the pictures. They are a beauty.



Surprisingly enough, I am looking forward to youth camp. Gonna take a different approach this time. Just gonne sink in and enjoy [= Life is too short to fight it. Haha. Here are a few stolen pics from the night. Note, a few pics of me from the night. Hahaha! Check Daniel's page out!

Countdown to Christmas, 12 more hours!! The year is coming to an end. Toodles 2007.

Have yourself a merry merry merry little Christmas.

-jOhN "jingles" LiM-

I'm back at crossroads again.

Oh wait, I don't have a choice anymore. Is it just me or is everyone just good at making right decision because I tend to always make the wrong ones. Over and over again.

Now, I can sit here and choose to be resentful and angry at what had happened OR I could be hopeful and optimistic to see a brighter outcome from all these. Again and again I fall to the same kind of thoughts. Thoughts to give up or pick myself up and move on. Stay disappointed or be motivated. It just runs in my mind all day long. Is everyone making it look easy? Mum says, at this age, we all seem to feel that we're alone and no one understands us and we're facing the most fatal situation and there is no one and nothing that can relate to us. I so feel this right now. Its not a big deal, but idea is, the situation ain't the focus, but the thoughts that get you through it.

We constantly fall into a ping-pong game of just falling behind defeat and victory. Can we really have the will to stand strong the whole way through? Does genes play a role here? Can we fairly say that some people just have the optimism in their blood? Can we conclude that some people are just so easy going that every trial and tribulation that might intercept their way would be easily countered and encountered? Look at it this way, its either a good reason, or just an excuse for people like me, that constantly fail to pick myself up and sulk over split rotten milk.

And then, there is the period where I get tired of it all and get up strong. Oh, but behold, it is only for a PERIOD. Then the whole cycle continues! Boring little old story? Yes. So, now, tell me, is it just me? Or do you go through it as well?

Solution to the problem? Friends that can push and hold your hand through these times? Yeah~ Friends. Same thing applies. Like I had posted earlier, I tend to screw things up just when everything seem to be going well. Same cycle, just apply it to humans. First, there is the stage when we are getting to know each other so well, we get along too well, we laugh at every matter, we're the best things that God had created, and then we have promises, we hold each other up for some time, then conflict begins, then resolution. Wait. THEN resolution, which I totally suck at. Not trying to find pity or sort here. Just trying to analize the situation. I like asking why? How did I handle it? OR did I even handle it?

Is it posssible? To craft and plan every move? Or be the breeze walker that walks through every situation, enjoying the breeze as it brushes his hair. Its exactly 11 days to a new year and here I am still screwed up with this year. Wait, I should choose to look at it this way. I should say something like, I'm here REFLECTING on the year. Urgh~ Gosh, this post is turning negative. No no. Must change the direction of the post.

December has been screwed. Hahaha. Didn't get to go to Singapore as initially planned. Plans backfired. Shopping sucked. Still DON'T have Christmas gifts. Short of funds. Full of excuses. Available for negative comments. Ready to explode. Unpleasent-nya. Hahaha.

Now, thats a way of looking at December, OR.....

December has been interesting. Hahaha. Although I didn't get to go to Singapore as planned, but I got to spend time with my cousin that came down and Steven. Though some plans were not executed, alternatives weren't too bad. Shopping didn't go too well because all I wanted was the best for my beloved friends and I couldn't find the best. Though I lack the funds, money don't buy love. Ready with hugs and loves. Expecting a blast. Excited-nya. Hahaha.

Ah. Didn't that feel good? I feel better actually. Does it sound too fake? Its not fake I assure you. Its another side of John. A pleasent side, which, seem to be quite pleasent. Hmm. Nice. [=

Still haven't found a solution to my confusion. Gonna have to make decisions soon. How'd I wish...

Counting down to Christmas. 5 Days.

O Sing all Ye Faithful,
-jOhN "merry" LiM-

We've come so far.

Days have been treating me well. Thankfully. Silence is a treatment though. Isn't a very nice one but it sure does make messages loud and clear.

Not much updates, but just getting my thing on the music scene. Gonna check out a few gigs around KL for the rest of December and kill the pain.

Decisions need to be made soon. Hmmmm.. Thinking of turning my blog private till I get my blogging style right. Hahaha. I'm boring man. I went through some of my previous posts years back, and the way I wrote really changed. Not to say I was ever interesting, but I just need a break from revealing dark emo-ness or useless rants. I'm sure readers do get tired of it too. All they wanna read about are about joyous occasions, happy celebrations and glorious "filled with good looking people" pictures. Haha. Have you gone blog surfing before? Just reading each post by post? I try. But only selected ones.

Oh well. I need an identity. Even my blog needs an identity. My singing needs identity. My life needs identity. Mum says that her Social Psychology book says I'm facing a normal phase of life. A phase in adolescense where I search for an Identity. But in my search for my identity, I have lost it. Three points to ponder about.

Three reasons why people have Identity Crisis/Lost:
1. High expectations. Yes. On yourself that is.
2. Comparissons. You compare too much of yourself to others and the people around you. I am speaking to you and myself here. There will always be someone more and lesser than you are. Always. Healthy comparisson is fine, just not too much till the point you sit and sulk and say "Hey, I'm lousy, I'm not trying anymore, thank you." [sounds extremely familiar].
3. We try to look at our dreams in the future with our present eyes. It just doesn't work that way. When the future has plans for you, settle with that and try not to understand it with your present knowledge and capabilities. We are just about too much for ourselves sometimes. No need to understand it all.

No need to understand it all. That still rings in my head. So many times I count, calculate, plan and try to understand, just to know that I am just so inedequate.

Mum says I need to find my purpose, my goal, my identity in this world, this society, in church, in college, among my friends, among my peers, among the people I mix with and in my family. Its really true. Find value in morale, find values that I would stand on, find meaning among the many individuals of the world, find true meaning just among the every "other". I need to know that I am worth more than a stone in this world. I need to know that so very much.

Think about it again. Meaning. Identity. Value. Worth. As long as I settle those questions, I can move on in life. Really. The next phase apparently is intimacy. Relationship. As long as I don't settle my Identity, I will never have a lasting intimate relationship with anyone around me. Because of the insecurities and uncertainties. Thats no wonder, everytime I try to find someone to Love and find attachment with just doesn't work out. Because I skipped a step in life [=

No more running away, but facing the hard truth. Life is sure one sureal experience. Still today I'm not sure to marvel at the creation of man or stand disgusted at the sight of its actions. Hahaha. Yet another value to look at. I remember watching Stardust the other time. And one part of the movie that got me thinking was when the Star was talking to the Rat [remember?]. I really can't remember any details anymore but I'll try. The Star mentioned something like it was pure disgust everytime the stars looked down on earth to see man's actions and the violence of war, betrayal, lust, greed and all its sins, but the only thing that was worth seing with surpassed it all was Love. That got me thinking. Is Love really that strong? Can love really undo every sin? For God so Loved the world.

Think with me will you? Do I need Love? Or do I just need to get a life? Gosh, I'll be surprise to find if anyone actually read the whole post without skipping a paragraph or two.

-jOhN "holidaying" LiM-

Finals are over. Now I just need to breathe, stay out of drama, enjoy and laugh all I can [=
Woohoo! Partaaaayyy~!! I need a To-Do list again. Will come out with it after certain decisions are made. Till then, I've not celebrated yet. Caught up with Aussielicious Stephen tonight, and popped by church for a cake-Grace day [= Happy Birthday again girl, You sweet thing. Hehehe..

[: You're on my radar.

Currently addited to Britney's Blackout. I've embedded it ALL here for you. YES! Piracy, muahahaha! But please do check it out. If you think Gimme More was good, you've only got a pinch of it. And even honestly, after listenin to the rest of the album, I don't even think Gimme More is good anymore. I recommend Get Naked (I've got a plan), Radar, Piece of Me, Perfect Lover and Freakshow. Hehehehe.. Don't worry my dear Jazz fans, I will post up some Jazz album up soon. Still searching. Hehehehe :P

Till then, Cheers to December and celebrations!! Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all my college friends. Safe trip, Moses, David, Saquib, YY, Raof, Geok Simm, Dong Gun, Casandra, and everyone that isn't local [; Take care alright?

Time to catch up with high school jesters. Catch ya all soon ;)

Pictures were from our Final Speech Class, the best class yet! Forgive obsceness. Thanx Cass

-jOhN "[=" LiM-

One Last Chance - James Morrison

In my life I don't mean much to anyone
I've lost my way can't go back anymore
Once I had everything now it's gone
Don't tell me again coz I've heard it all before
Some people say that i'm not worth it
I've made mistakes but nobody's perfect
Guess I'll give it a try

I've got one last chance to get myself together
I can't lose no more time it's now or never and
I'll try to remember who i used to be
I've got one last chance to get myself together
The time has come for me to change again

I can't carry on like this, I will lose my friends - don't say that you have given up on me.
Just give me the time and space to heal my head
I don't wanna be misunderstood
I've got to take this chance and make it into something good



This is sooo for me :P

This Boy

Dedicated to the Boy that has grown up.

- Officially Closing the Door to my Heart -

Call it Vow, Promise, whatever~ Its signed with the blood in my heart.
Goodbye, Heart. Its better left untouched then touched.

I'll see what I want to see

I'll be what I want to be

And I know, I can be.



-jOhN "this boy" LiM-

Yet again Life unfolds another Dark Chapter. Here goes.
Tell me now, is it human nature to move on to another when things get bad with the current one? Or is it just me?

I'm hurting inside. I need a cure.

Speak. Say. Tell.

When will I ever reach Moksha? Mum says I'm finding my identity. Internal conflicts.
Its like, I know who I am, but I'm rejecting it, but I'm accepting it.
I like who I am, but at the same time I'm hating it too.

They say peace is not the ultimate goal of mankind. There is always going to be a trade-off somewhere. Its impossible if Claire's blood is gonna heal all humanity. Man will take like and health forgranted. So what if the weapons of mass destruction were destroyed? So what if Israel gave up their land? So what if Bush waved the white flag? So what if Hindraf gets their RM1million per Indian their claiming? SO WHAT!

When will mankind ever be satisfied? And so what if you're satisfied with where you are? Then you'll never progress! You'll be stuck all useless and roting right at your shell. I've seen numerous people, with great attitudes but they lacked the hunger, the hunger to progress, and soon after get left behind. Donald Trump would have fired you a long time ago. Wait, I take that back. He wouldn't even have hired you.

Balance you say? I guess that will just cause dissatisfaction then. You'll never be at your highest potential of happiness. There needs to be some level of equilibrium or balance. But then again, we will always want to maximize our pie. But isn't the sky our limit? Wait, then there's no pie.

Have I lost you there? Identity. Thats what I need. A clear cut. But I know I will never get one. Have I just got tired of the masks? Or have I got confused with which mask to wear everytime I went out?

The human behaviour disgust me but intrigues me at the same time. Dissonance they call it.

Good/Evil, Hate/Love, Peaceful/Havoc, John/John.

-jOhN "yet another piece of his useless mind" LiM-

I've decided! I'll go with JAZZ!! Woohoo!

Was over at Bangkok Jazz tonight and was blown away. It was featuring some bass player that just came back from Berkeley with his Japanese gf on the keys. She was beyond awesome, nothing like I've heard before! Apparently she is Beyonce's keyboardist. Ahhh Heaven!

Was just enjoying myself listenin to the lead singer when someone walked passed me to go to the toilet. My friend went like, "Eh, thats Sheila Majid~".. Like wth man.. She was there to observe too. Ahhh.. Jazz my love, friend, baby, sweetheart! I'll never let you go! Don't ever let me go!

Desperately seeking for HUGE leap in improvement and inspiration. Gonna write some pieces after exam. I PROMISE! (=

For now, STUDYYYYY!! :'(

-jOhN "humming" LiM-

BlackMeOut

Woohooo. Britney's Blackout puts me in a trance man. Sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeetttt.

Now going back and forth betwee getting Stacey Kent's new swing album, or Diana Krall's Greatest Jazz Hits or Britney's HEAD BANGING Blackout.

>.< src="http://media.imeem.com/pl/v4WVeo0QVz" width="300" height="290" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent">

Impermanent they say..

Yeah, Finals are drawing near, like a week plus away? Final speech is next week. Final World Religion presentation is next week too. Last Statistic test is next week. WTH! Oh boy. Drowning myself in college now. I would have to admit this semester has been a rather interesting one. I had made even more friends. Got to know a few people a little better. Got myself involved in the Buddy Program, tought PASS 093, business plan competition, and I'm even gonna MC for the graduation ceremony for ADP this Fall, though its an irony, it actually might be my last semester myself. Life just has its funny plans for us.

Yeah, I've not decided where I'll go for Uni. Not even sure when I'll leave. Not even sure what major I wanna stick to. Decisions. Taking it one step at a time.

Just waved goodbye to a new found Brunei friend recently.

I was inspired by him to go over to Brunei for a visit. And I might just, if this is my last semester in ADP. Pop by in January, and maybe even drop by Miri to visit Moses. Wait, Moses should have been back here in Subang. Damn. I'll still pop by Miri and then fly over to Mulu Caves! Its freaking awesome! And I'm getting excited over my plans. Travelling! Woohoo! Probably I can drag Sam (Brunei Boy) along on this adventure.

Counting down till holidays in December. Though its gonna be freaking short, I'm gonna make the most out of it and stay out of drama.

2007. I don't even know if I like ya or not. Gonna do some reflection post in some mid-Dec. Till then, I'll just live as I am. Cheers to better days. Looking forward to Huge House Party tomorrow at Sze Ming's place >.<>

-jOhN "needs to leave" LiM-

ps: Yee En, I read your blog =)

When I woke up,
It all became clear. What I really meant to you.

When I slept,
My dreams came true.

When I woke up,
It all became blur. The things you said to me.

When I slept,
My fears vanished.

When I woke up,
It all seemed to work out. The past and the future.

When I slept,
My insecurities proved to be a nuisance; again.

When I woke up,
I was dreaming.
When I slept,
I was awake.

Think. Think. And think again. Ignorance really is bliss.

-jOhN "flying" LiM-

You made me realise the meaning to life again.

You made me smile even when it was dark.

You made me laugh at every serious moment we had together.

You made me cry in joy.

You made rock music sound like sweet jazz.

You made love look like chocolate pies with peanut butter jelly all over it.

You made me feel like I was meant to live for you.

You made the whole world light up.

You made cherry blossom trees blossom even when it was winter.

You made the raging seas cuddle up in your arms.

You made the bed warm.

You made me press the toothpaste from the bottom.

You made me overcooked pancake breakfasts that tasted disgusting.

You made me call you even when I only had 50 cents of left of credit.

You made my eyes light up everytime we met .

You made me appreciate the gift of life again.

You, are not real. Sigh.

Ever watched Hereos?

Ever wished you had an ability?

Well, I finally discovered mine.

I have the ability to see the worst of things and screw the best memories and moments in my life and of the lives of the people around me.

Incredible? Its a gift, thank you.

-jOhN "screws you" LiM-

>.<

Allow these pictures express the thousand words I have to say.

Hope. Singing in the rain. Wee small hours of the morning. What a difference a day makes. Put the blame on me. Apologize. I'll stand by You [recommended listening].

Taking baby steps back. H m. J s y h m. I a s. R s. B i g t w n t b t. I L Y. F m? I w f m. Y w j u. A p.

The less words, the better. I hate blog/msn communicating.

-jOhN "away" LiM-

Not much words, but today was an interesting day. Had to sit for the SAT examination in the morning. Mind you, it was a 4 hour paper. Sigh. Hopefully all will turn out well :P

Got down to business in the evening when I got over to Dee's place for make-up for ADP HALLOWEEN.. Will just let the pics do the talkin. Had a good time TRYING to dress up. i was SOOO underdressed :P But good effort ADP-ians. I'm impressed :)

Oh.. Mind the new hair-do :) Change is good. Till then, let Love reign.

-jOhN "halloween" LiM-

So is this how you "kick" someone out?

Don't get me wrong. I ain't blamming you guys for doing what you did, but I'd appreciate it that you'd ask me first. Yes, it is the Fishing LEAST you can do. Really. I'd thought too much of you. I honestly don't need anymore reasons to be disappointment with the likes of you. But I'm going to refuse to blame him.

Before you read anymore into my words, DON'T GET ME WRONG! I'm not pissed for what you did, I'm just pissed that you assumed. You thought. But if you would just come up to me just once more, and ASK, not even apoplogize, You don't even have to, I'd smile and forgive.

I get it. I really do now. Humans. The weakest of all species. I'm ashamed to be called one.

I tend to over blow and over think things, but how then can I highlight the urgency of the matter? If you don't understand simple english, I'M BEING RUDE FOR THE SAKE OF GETTING YOUR ATTENTION.

At least you don't know who you are. WTH~

"My gawd! What has happened to John?".... ;) I've just got ya where I want ya to be..

-jOhN "~.~" LiM-

And so it is...

From then, from now. I can't. I just don't know how to understand anymore. Pain? Ever heard of the line that goes, "I'm not in Denial". You get the picture. There is just no more essence in me. Is that all I can do? Reminiscent of the past or just blame it..

But is there anyone to blame or should there be anything to blame? I choose. I've chosen.

Look at me again, won't you? Just lay your eyes on my heart and hear it cry, won't you? Did you actually see me, or did I see you? Did you actually choose me before anything else? I'm just an epitome of disappointment and confusion..

In and out. Out and in. In and in. Out and out. You get it don't you? I've seen. And now, I will see..

How can you guys just look rom a far and scorn at me with disgust? I'm utterly speechless. At least warn me. But then again, you're just gonna do it to oblige to the teachings. I don't appreciate patronism. And I KNOW when you're real. Trust me. Its a gift. I hear, I see, I smell, I know. The only reason I am the way I am in front of you is all an act of negligence and isolationism. But I want your care, so much, but yet I want you to hate me at the same time. Love me, Hate me. Play me by my ear and cut it. Run your hand through my hair and burn it. Smile at me with disgust. Love me, Hate me..

I've lost it all together. Its beyond it all. Really. Its not as simple as you think it is, but yet, it is that simple. I just want you to accept me. It doesn't mean you have to approve of my actions or join me. All I need you for is You. Can't you just go beyond what appears to be and look into the hollow of my eyes. ..

Reject my actions but Accept my sanctions. Don't behave like me but Do bereave my darker side. I just can't stop thinking how'd You feel about me. After all I have done to you. I know you forgive me, I do, I honestly do. But I can't forgive myself. I just can't...

I don't blame you for what your side have done. But I blame myself. Its all me. Self pity? Self mutilation now sounds good. Suicidal? Kindling..

To you out there, don't worry. Destiny has its way to go about. The only thing I am wondering is how you'd work around it. You have one tough job to begin now. Or are you all the powerful?..

Working through my eskimo friend. Just like you said it would be. Life goes easy on me, mostly..

This is terrible writting. Forgive me? I won't..

-jOhN "( : )" LiM-

PS:Recommended hearing for such moods, DAMIEN RICE.

Woah..

So much to update but so little time. A brief one till I add some pictures to it.

Rushed down to Singapore for the Raya Holidays and had a BLAST there! I'm so going down there again in December with some mateys. Can't wait!

Till then, Hectic October is not over. Oh well.

Anyway, I'm leaving you with a clip of me singing at Alexis the other time ;) Hope you enjoy. Its not the full video :P

Love ya peeps.

Been so busy the past few weeks, need to breathe again.

But I'd prefer being busy than free. No shitty thoughts, no waste of time, no shit ass stupid childish dumb misunderstandings and being productive.

I'd probably have a full plan till the end of the year already. Woohoo?

Tentative plans

Prepare for the SAT which I will be seating on the 3rd of November.

Apply for the TOEFL which I will seat somewhere in November too.

Finals on the 4th-7th of December.

FUN with Aussie mates who will be back in December. Road trip a must

Choosing Uni's. Applying for Uni's.

Catch up will beloved people.

2007. This year, a year worth looking back. So many good and bad. So many.

Gosh, I'm already reflecting. Yes, if you've not caught up with time, the year is ending and the freaking end of the world is coming. So need to disattach myself with the world already.

Till the next time, Find Love my friends, let Love be the highest aim. It gives life. Truly. If your love ain't giving you life, it ain't the right love.

-jOhN "breathing" LiM-

Yes! I've finally got the time to update my bloggy...

Let's just let the pictures do the talking.. Will talk about happenings a little later next week.. Got a wedding this weekend and freaking loads of work to finish.. Catch up soon peeps ;)

Janice, doing her thing..
Me and the star for the night
Yi Yin :)
A corner of the place after it was all over..
Our stage

Singing ma heart out..Da Pastor was there :P
Uncle Si Fu :P
Mua with Eddy Yap, Janice's younger bro.. Yes, Eddy, and you better not forget me anymore :P
:)

Driving to Alexis@Ampang
Alexis; featuring Janice Yap
Mua, with sis and Janice herself..
A pic before we began with Amanda Q
Sista support :)

ps:btw, janice is Joey Yap's younger sister.. Yes, Feng Shui Joey Yap :P

Till then... Have a great week ahead my dear friends!

-jOhN "pulling through" LiM-

Sorry I've not been updating people.

Have been so busy. But yeah, loads has happen since my last post. LOADS.

Putting that aside first, since I now have to time to pop by my blog, I need to upadte ya'll on my activities. Yes.

This coming Friday and Saturday I will be singing backup for Janice Yap, or JYMY, at Alexis, Jalan Ampang. Janice is the host for Trippin' on 8tv every Wednesday 9.30pm. And yes, you're cordially invited! Below are the details. Don't hesitate to drop me a msg about it ;) Looking forward to seing familiar faces there when we perform :P

Where? Alexis, Jalan Ampang@Great Eastern Mall
When? Friday and Saturday (21st & 22nd Sept 2007), 10.30pm to 1.00am
Who? Janice Yap and Band and of course with John backing her up on the vocals..
Why? Because you love music!
How? Transport not provided :P

COME PEEPS COME!! We;ve been practicing every night! And I'm excited!! :P

See ya!!

As Chuang Tze woke up from his dream he pondered, "Did I dream of the butterful or did the butterfly dream of me?"

"There are more things in the heavens and earth than is dreamt of in thy philosophy" -Tiong-
Did God create man, or did man create God instead?


Philosophy is getting a hold on me. Blame it on World Religion. It is going to be an interesting semester all together. It has got to be an interesting one.


The mind does wonders. Let me tell you a secret, the Angkor Wat in Cambodia isn't the center of the universe, neither is the Batu Suci in Mekkah, or neither is the Ziggurats in Egypt. It is Your mind. You hold the power to Your own universe. The mind has limitless power. Now free your mind and think. Can You?

-Stare out the window. You might just see droplets of Life. It drips on the outside-

The most random picture of the lot. John's thinking paterns are changing. Its getting freaky.

I was just browsing through some of the post I posted when I first begun this blog and I was amazed by how much I have grown/change or whatever you call it. I like how this blog has turn out. And therefore, it owns the credit to be mentioned in my speech tomorrow. Cheers to the baby steps that I will continue to take through this life, good nor bad, I will take a step.

Who is there to path my lane. I wait.

You're sweet little bro, truly. Thanks for the little email. I appreciate :)

Farewell Sept 5, 07

-jOhN "fly away" LiM-

I wonder what is Behind this Face.

I wish that you knew.

Was it meant to be this way?
Was mankind meant to live in war and conflict?

What would the world be like without Sin?
From a sinful perspective, it'll be boring,
with no conflict and war,
with no anger and bitterness,
with no jealousy and hatred,
with no malice and curses,
with no lust and perversion
Pitch perfect. Sinless.

See my point? This is where I can evaluate your human philosophy.

Now, would it be a good thing or not?
Does the world sound less interesting now?
Does it sound like a robotic pre-planned galaxy that is blameless and pure in every way and sight
Tell me. Was it all meant to be that way?

Take a moment and think it through.
Were we really meant to live in perfection?
Then how do we see the light when we have not known the darkness?
Then how do we know happiness and fulfillment when we've not seen grief and disappointment?
How do we then conclude that life is FINALLY complete, when at the first place, we are so perfectly complete without sin.

Got you thinking even more? Do you think Sin is that bad now?
I'm not going to conclude for you here tonight,
Neither am I trying to convince you that Sin isn't Sin after all.
Honestly, if you ask me, I'm asking the same things.
Is sin really sin after all?
Or is the devil tricking me into shaking your foundations.

Now, take some time to reflect on a perfect world.
Beaming smiles and joy constantly,
A world without sexual impurity and nakedness are present simultaneously]
Nakedness from the world inside out. Literally. From the INSIDE. [note that I'm highlighting inner personality more :P]
Peace and serenity, with jazz playing in the background.
There is even no need for tolerance because there is nothing to be tolerated
We'd love each other too much.

Is that how it was suppose to be?
Forgive my shallow thoughts, my Lord.
It is obviously beyond my childish comprehension.

Conclusion?
I've fallen short of His highness to even gasp his wonders.
But seriously, I wonder.
A world without Sin.
Fun or no Fun, thats for you to conclude now.

Credits;

Nicole Kidman and little Ollie.

Rohnie Tan Wei Chern

Jealous people who are looking on now ;P You know who you are.

I still enjoy thinking. But a word of caution, it brings you to no conclusion.

Forgive the mess, Thoughts all over

-jOhN "when God made You" LiM-

How do I continue taking steps forward when You don't allow me?

I'm letting room for clearance
But the luggage ain't getting through the passage
Won't you even acknowledge my presence?
Won't you even flick an eyebrow to look into my eyes
To see the sincerity of my cry
Won't you just let your hands out
To hold me for the last time

I'm not going to let this just past me by without a fight
But the battle is just on my side
As you look by the distance beyond the hillside
Clouding my cries to you
You look on with much joy

As I torture myself day to day
With questions and doubt
But I guess I'll never be able to work against your gravity
Its going against me
Letting go will be this hard
As every second goes by
A thought of you comes by as well

Pointless ranting of you. But its the last dedication to you.
Ironic. Singing I'm over it, when I'm still not over it.

Over it? Naa. Plain words of sophistry.

-jOhN "R" LiM-

See, all I want You to do is be my Love. But now, its fine.

Here I am again.

Mum says I must always tell if I'm not happy.
Am I?

I guess I just hate not having control of the situation and plan. I envy the people that can just take things as they are and accept life as it comes. I tend to get left behind with Disappointment. When will I ever learn to move on. Even with this issue with You. Just the past week I seem to have did the best of the worst things that anyone could have thought of. I am clearly a specialist at destroying the 'moment'. Call me "potong-stim" or "party pooper" but I just tend to not play along with practical jokes and crap talk sometimes. Its a real pain in the ass sometimes when I give you that stare after a lame joke.

What is my point? I'm unsure myself. That is how confused I am right now. Hahaha.

Tonight I'm just gonna write whatever that runs into my mind. I'm always describing my confusion. I like showing my vulnerability. I like showing that I am a wreck. But at the same time, I like to potray a strong and independent John, ready to take charge, ready to face the challenges ahead of me. I think we all have our moments when we step up and uncover the fearless self inside. I'm not all weak either. Its just, I have such an unhealthy thinking pattern that it eats me inside out so often times. I constantly fall back into the pit of depression. It can somehow get rather frustrating watching me go back and forth and never breaking forth into the hills.

Earlier on I mentioned I envied people that appeared somehow relaxed and without worry. Yes, I do envy them, so much in fact. I can't stand the fact I can't live my life everyday just playing the PS2, sleeping all day long, and careless about their CGPA/results/academic performance. My results are constantly banging in my head, my decision for Uni applications is persistently bugging me, my relationship with You is relentlessly harassing me, my relationship with my friends is at an alarming level, worries about my identity and individuality is annoyingly pesky. I always have this thought that I don't really know my true self. Truly. Everyday I'm getting to myself a little better and the more I know myself, the more I hate myself. Weird isn't is? Hey, but man can never be contented. Neither am I. I'm always wanting more, wanting to get beter, wanting to be more mature, wanting to think different, wanting to develop at a faster rate, wanting unrealistic things and just wanting instantaneity.

(= This world is just getting more screwed up by the second, and I ain't making it better. I like to think I'm weird and boring. Which at a certain level, is true =P but who cares la.

Oh well. Crapped loads tonight already. Just another post about worries and my twisted self.

-jOhN ♪ LiM-

Tonight.

Messed up. Zoom. Waited. Cried. Thought. Gazed. Dreamt. Wished. Swayed. Fell. Fear. Hurt. Corrected. But finnally Loved.

I thank You for that.

Time and time again, it is always the Loved ones that I hurt constantly. But You never gave up. At least I don't think you did :P

Is it worth it? I'm honestly unsure. Yet.

I've not gotten an answer yet Lord,

But I'll wait, in patience.. Because I know I'll hear you, or at least, You'll hear me..

The past few days I've been really troubled about the situations of life. I'm toying with certain ideas for my future and it all seems so unclear. There were just too many things to be taken into consideration that I just lost looking at simlpe faith.

But surrendering it all to God is all I can do at this moment. Won't let confusion blind me.

A few things I took note of listening to Dr. Bernard Blessing this morning... Hope it blesses you as it had with me.

"Surrendering our basket of weaknesses, fear and doubts to find hope in it"

"I am a solution, not a problem"

"Turning the ugly situation into a beautiful miracle"

"How can God teach you peace without letting you know suffering. How can God teach you grace without letting you knowing cruelty. How can God teach you love without you knowing hate"

Time and time again, I come broken at the feet of God. All I am is just a servant of God, ready to be used by what I have. If he had looked upon my sins and judged me based on what I've done, I would have been bound to the depts of hell a long time ago. But yet, He is gracious to still choose me, weak and small as I am, to turn curses into blessings.

It has been a long week. Much has happened. Much. But I'm not here to tell you, "NOW I have the answers!". NO! I don't. Not even a bit. But I'm trusting. In what? In the future that God has for me. I don't know what it is. All I know, it is going to be exceedingly beyond my expectations, far better than I would ever imagine. He has a plan for me and each and everyone of us. Are we giving it to Him?...

Life is one interesting journey. So much to learn, so much to go through. At least I know I'm not alone :)

Good night people. Have a great week ahead. All the best to the Taylor's A-Levels students and welcome back to classes ADP students. It is going to be a whole new interesting semester.

-jOhN "faith" LiM-

Not till I hear you tonight...

.... Waiting in silence ....

thinking

more thinking

.....

givin myself to this ....

doubts ....

troubles ....

reasons ....

confusion ....

as I wait ....

in agony

:) Will You?

Longing to be by your side.

-jOhN "*.*" LiM-

Just like the old times. Like literally. Spookingly enough, we were all wearing the SAME outfits the night we went out together the last time in Kiara.

I'll spare the details but here is to more nights of black :) Cheers

Dinner - Rush Hour 3 - Camwhores@carpark - MahJong

Yes, In the shopping cart.. We were playing push-push in the carpark


Ber-gaya-ness


This is what happens when a car passes by~

:D

Woohoo.. Mahjong!

-jOhN "mahjonging" LiM-

I just feel so small in this big place.

I feel so messed up and confused.

Back to square one.

Where is this little life heading towards?

Tell me.

Yo people!

At last I found time to pop by my little blog. Holidays have been rather productive since. This is actually the first time I actually have a goal for my holiday. All these while, I never had an aim or a certain goal to achieve in my holidays, but this time its different. I have a list ;) *wink*



Oh well. Let us just highlight SOME events :)


Friday night@Curve for Abigail's birthday. Happy Birthday again girl! Headed on to Hartamas after that for a long night chat with ma peeps. It was really good after a really long time of not having those kinda conversations. I like mind boggling topics that are debatable and still questionable. I can't help it but to disagree to only agree. But its just me. If you can convince me, then you've really convinced me. If not, you're convinced :) Oh well~



Saturday night at Mardi Gras. Yes, we were TOO early. Oh well, I was still glad to see faces I've not seen for ages! Caught up with most of them. Hanged around a little till they decided to switch to Santuary. I decided to detour to Laundry instead and meet with Dee & her Irene with her extremely pleasent boyfriend. Had loads of fun that night and went home woozy :) Thanx Chu &amp;amp;amp; EeJin again ;) Hehehe...

Popped by PC fair with Vinz while Jo & Dee did some shopping in KLCC on Sunday. Flew back down to Curve for a nice meal and later on drinks at the Apartment. Got a few bartenders to show us tricks :P And guess who we spotted too? :P

The past few days I have been reading and YES, I finally watched Hairspray! Woooh. Lovely. Well, to prove how much I actually like it, I watched it 3 times in the same day! :P Had time to watch Lake House as well, starring Sandra Bullock and Keanu Reeves. OMG man this movie. Can cry man. I SO TOTALLY RECOMMEND THIS MOVIE! Anyone has Sleepless in Seattle? Or Jerry Maguire? Need to get hold of those too. Oh well~

Hmmm. No wonder I haven't updated for this long. As I type right now, I just feel like deleting everything. Fuh~ Weird night.

I shall add more juicy details another night la. Tonight is just not the night. Don't feel right. Hmmm~ I have also been taking a few evening walks alone. Thinking. Just thinking. There has been just so much thoughts in my mind. Fuh~~~ :'(


Looking forward to the next few days. Still have a number of things to accomplish this holiday. C'mon baby!



-jOhN "holidaying" LiM-