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GRANDMA?
Randall just wanted to have a fun summer vacation with his family, visiting Grandma at her cabin on a lake in the Wisconsin Northwoods.
Then everything went horribly wrong.
Join fifteen-year-old Randall, and his younger brother Josh, as they fight for their lives on the eve of an elderly undead apocalypse.
GRANDMA? - The Complete Novel
She won't bake you cookies...
Forget everything you've ever read about zombies. But that's probably impossible, because you know you've read a lot. So maybe just put aside your preconceptions, because this living dead epic will make you remember why you fell in love with this genre in the first place. Part scary, part funny, this is a living dead Armageddon like you've never seen before.
This book is over 60,000 words long. It also includes a Q&A with the authors on the creation of the novel.
If you are a more sensitive (or adventurous) reader, this handy scale rates specific categories from 1 (lowest) to 10 (highest) to give you some idea if this is your kind of book.
GRANDMA?
Bad Language - 4
Scary - 6
Violent - 6
Funny - 8
Sexy - 2
- LanguageEnglish
- Publication dateJanuary 16, 2017
- File size453 KB
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Editorial Reviews
Review
What They're Saying About Joe Konrath's Writing
"Excellent smart-mouth thrills... my advice: Take a long sip."- Lee Child, author of Blue Moon
"Constant thrills and chills." - Heather Graham, author of The Seekers
"Snappy dialogue. Powerful action. A fabulous character to spend time with." - David Morrell, author of First Blood
"If the Grim Reaper has a sense of humor, he reads JA Konrath."- William Kent Krueger, author of This Tender Land
"It's funny and scary, just like real life."- James O. Born, author of Shock Wave
"Laugh-out-loud funny... even when read sober."- PJ Parrish, author of The Killing Song
"I haven't actually read this book." - Dave Barry, author of Tricky Business
"Fast-paced...(a) cross between Carl Hiaasen and Thomas Harris."- Publishers Weekly
"Engaging... full of humor... fans of Janet Evanovich will like this."- Library Journal
"Pithy banter... it's like a Monty Python rendition of a crime novel."- The Courier
"Put me down for another round of Lieutenant Jack Daniels." - Andrew Vachss, author of Another Life
"A literary cocktail that'll knock you off your chair." - Ridley Pearson, author of White Bone
From the Author
For the completists, or those with a bit of obsessive/compulsiveness, or the folks that just like my stuff and want to know how it all connects, I have a lot of recurring characters and intertwined series. If you need to know the best reading order, or how to make sure you haven't missed anything, check out the bibliography page on my website. You can also visit there to see when a new title will be released.
If you're just looking for a quick checklist, here are my main series.
These do not have to be read in any particular order, but I encourage you to read them all.
JACK DANIELS THRILLERS
#1-Whiskey Sour
#2-Bloody Mary
#3-Rusty Nail
#4-Dirty Martini
#5-Shot Of Tequila
#6-Fuzzy Navel
#7-Cherry Bomb
#8-Dead On My Feet
#9-Serial Killers Uncut (with Blake Crouch)
#10-Shaken
#11-Stirred (with Blake Crouch)
#12-Dying Breath
#13-Everybody Dies
#14-Rum Runner
#15-Last Call
#16-White Russian
#17-Shot Girl
#18-Chaser
#19-Old Fashioned
#20-Bite Force
#21-Jack Rose
#22-Witch Brew
Bonus #2.5-Lady 52 (with Jude Hardin)
Jack Daniels Stories Vol. 1 (Novella Collection)
Jack Daniels Stories Vol. 2 (Novella Collection)
Jack Daniels Stories Vol. 3 (Novella Collection)
Jack Daniels Stories Vol. 4 (Novella Collection)
Banana Hammock (Novella Collection)
THE KONRATH DARK THRILLER COLLECTIVE
#1-The List
#2-Origin
#3-Afraid
#4-Trapped
#5-Endurance
#6-Haunted House
#7-Webcam
#8-Disturb
#9-What Happened To Lori
#10-The Nine
#11-Second Coming
#12-Close Your Eyes
Bonus #4.5-Holes in the Ground (with Iain Rob Wright)
Bonus #5.5-Draculas (with Blake Crouch, Jeff Strand, F. Paul Wilson)
Bonus #6.5-Grandma? (with Talon Konrath)
TIMECASTER
#1-Timecaster
#2-Timecaster Supersymmetry
#3-Timecaster Steampunk
CODENAME: CHANDLER (with Ann Voss Peterson)
#1-Flee
#2-Spree
#3-Three
#4-Hit
#5-Exposed
#6-Naughty
#7-Fix (with F. Paul Wilson)
#8-Rescue
#9-Free
STOP A MURDER PUZZLE BOOKS
#1-How: Puzzles 1-12
#2-Where: Puzzles 13-24
#3-Why: Puzzles 25-36
#4-Who: Puzzles 37-48
#5-When: Puzzles 49-60
#6-Answers
Stop A Murder Complete Cases (Book 1-5)
MISCELLANEOUS
65 Proof - Collected Short Stories
The Globs Of Use-A-Lot 3 (With Dan Maderak)
From the Back Cover
If you want something to do for the next two years and insist on reading every Konrath novel, here are the order the author recommends:
WHISKEY SOUR
BLOODY MARY
THE LIST
RUSTY NAIL
AFRAID
DEAD ON MY FEET
DIRTY MARTINI
FLEE
ORIGIN
SHOT OF TEQUILA
JACK DANIELS STORIES VOL. 1
TRAPPED
FUZZY NAVEL
CHERRY BOMB
SPREE
DRACULAS
DYING BREATH
JACK DANIELS STORIES VOL. 2
HOLES IN THE GROUND
SERIAL KILLERS UNCUT
ENDURANCE
THREE
SHAKEN
STIRRED
EVERYBODY DIES
HAUNTED HOUSE
LADY 52
TIMECASTER
JACK DANIELS STORIES VOL. 3
RUM RUNNER
WEBCAM
GRANDMA?
TIMECASTER SUPERSYMMETRY
LAST CALL
HIT/EXPOSED/NAUGHTY
DISTURB
WHAT HAPPENED TO LORI
WHITE RUSSIAN
JACK DANIELS STORIES VOL. 4
SHOT GIRL
65 PROOF
STOP A MURDER COMPLETE CASES
CHASER
BANANA HAMMOCK
THE NINE
OLD FASHIONED
SECOND COMING
BITE FORCE
CLOSE YOUR EYES
JACK ROSE
TIMECASTER STEAMPUNK
About the Author
Product details
- ASIN : B01MS2P80T
- Accessibility : Learn more
- Publication date : January 16, 2017
- Language : English
- File size : 453 KB
- Screen Reader : Supported
- Enhanced typesetting : Enabled
- X-Ray : Not Enabled
- Word Wise : Enabled
- Print length : 246 pages
- Page Flip : Enabled
- Best Sellers Rank: #1,576,878 in Kindle Store (See Top 100 in Kindle Store)
- #6,143 in Horror Suspense
- #6,493 in Ghost Thrillers
- #20,906 in Psychological Thrillers (Kindle Store)
- Customer Reviews:
About the authors

Joe Konrath has written over twenty novels in the Lt. Jacqueline "Jack" Daniels thriller series. They do not have to be read chronologically to be enjoyed, but the order is: Whiskey Sour, Bloody Mary, Rusty Nail, Dirty Martini, Shot of Tequila, Fuzzy Navel, Cherry Bomb, Dead On My Feet, Serial Killers Uncut (with Blake Crouch), Shaken, Stirred (with Blake Crouch), Dying Breath, Everybody Dies, Rum Runner, Last Call, White Russian, Shot Girl, Chaser, Old Fashioned, Bite Force, Witch Brew, Pink Lady, Bourbon Hammer, Moscow Mule, and Dark and Stormy. More coming soon.
Wow, that's a lot of Jack.
If you like your thrillers on the dark side, check out the Konrath Dark Thriller Collective, which includes the books The List, Origin, Afraid, Trapped, Endurance, Haunted House, Webcam, Disturb, What Happened To Lori, The Nine, Second Coming, Close Your Eyes, and Enraged.
Joe also wrote the Stop A Murder mystery puzzle series, where you become the sleuth and solve brain teasers to try and catch a killer.
He also wrote the sci-fi trilogy, Timecaster, Timecaster Supersymmetry, and Timecaster Steampunk. Even if you don't think you like sci-fi, give them a try. They feature Joe's well-known characters from his other series, and are insane.
With Ann Voss Peterson he wrote the Codename: Chandler thrillers, including Flee, Spree, Three, Hit, Exposed, Naughty, Fix (with F. Paul Wilson), Rescue, and Free.
And, finally, he writes erotica under the pen name Melinda DuChamp, also with Ann Voss Peterson. Those books are probably too spicy for you, so only the brave and bold should seek them out.
Joe writes a lot. You should probably read everything.

Talon Konrath is newbie twenty-year-old author.
He collaborated on his first book, the YA zombie novel GRANDMA? with his best-selling father, J.A. Konrath. (www.jakonrath.com).
You can find the short clips he made on his youtube account, https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCWUoTSIvQRy8MDHHMK8veNQ
Check out his website, www.talonkonrath.com.
You can also find Talon posting funny tweets and/or important updates on his twitter account, @talonkonrath
Customer reviews
Customer Reviews, including Product Star Ratings help customers to learn more about the product and decide whether it is the right product for them.
To calculate the overall star rating and percentage breakdown by star, we don’t use a simple average. Instead, our system considers things like how recent a review is and if the reviewer bought the item on Amazon. It also analyzed reviews to verify trustworthiness.
Learn more how customers reviews work on AmazonCustomers say
Generated from the text of customer reviewsSelect to learn more
Top reviews from the United States
- 5 out of 5 stars
Grandma !
Reviewed in the United States on May 16, 2017Hilarious, spoofy (is that a real word ?), rip roaring ride across the lake,outrageous and thoroughly entertaining! Another Konrath conquest to be sure. Thanks to Talon (cool name by the by) for the bizarre and ultimately success idea !!! J.A. : I've been a fan for several years now and am continually surprised /amused/grossed out by your work.. ..
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CancelReport - 4 out of 5 stars
Stupid zombie fun
Reviewed in the United States on May 23, 2017Ok, yes, if you really want to be a tool and be that one person who has to complain about how stupid this book is, go ahead, and vent, because, honestly, I'll agree with you. Yes, Grandma? is dumb, stupid, and totally ridiculous. Yes, it lacks any kind of literary merit, originality, or even much in the way of writing skill. Yes, I know its about ambulatory, intelligent, geriatric zombies. I get it. its pretty idiotic and juvenile.
But you know what? I'm totally ok with that because while I do agree that Grandma? was far, far, far, away from any kind of deep, meaningful or insiteful reading, I sure as hell had a lot of fun reading it.
You see, in this day and age of pretentious authors who think their overwrought and unnecessary drivel of an author means something, there are still others out there who write just for the everlasting fun of it. They write because they enjoy the art of writing. They write to have fun.
It's pretty obvious that Grandma? is just that kind of book. Konrath and his son clearly went ahead and wrote this book about old, shambling zombies because it was just a fun thing to do. Not only for the pure enjoyment, but also as an experiment in father/son bonding. Personally, I thought the book they came up with turned out great.
It's stupid, but at least it's stupid fun.
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CancelReport - 3 out of 5 stars
Solid effort!
Reviewed in the United States on March 19, 2017This was a fun diversion that didn't involve a lot of heavy lifting.
If zombies aren't your thing, this book isn't for you. But if they are, this is a YA take on the genre with an interesting premise: only the elderly become reanimated flesh eaters. There are some nice references to classic zombie movies like "Night of the Living Dead."
Randall and Josh are brothers and they are very likable characters. I was pulling for them the whole time.
There is a dark and twisted sense of humor here. This bit made me laugh out loud:
"Papa got the cancer, and the doctor removed his tongue and lower jaw. He died not long after, not from cancer, but of malnutrition, because he could only chew if he placed food on the edge of a table and pounded his upper teeth down on it."
Is it bad that I laughed at that? Maybe. But I did laugh.
This is not for everyone but it is a solid effort from Talon Konrath and his dad, Joe.
2 people found this helpfulSending feedback...Sending feedback...HelpfulThank you for your feedback.Sorry, we failed to record your vote. Please try againThanks, we'll investigate in the next few days.Sorry, We failed to report this review. Please try againWe'll check if this review meets our community guidelinesOpens in a new tab. If it doesn't, we'll remove it.
CancelReport - 5 out of 5 stars
Best Zombie Collaboration Ever
Reviewed in the United States on June 26, 2020For various reasons, I have needed comfort books. Mr. Konrath's books fit that need perfectly. This was a new one since I checked in, loved the cover, and then loved the book.
The setting is idyllic. Parents, two boys, and one Grandma staying at a lake cabin. Lots of fishing, cookie baking, and today, the parents are off on a walk/hike. Grandma is gardening, boys doing boy stuff.
On another part of the lake, a self-styled inventor has a surprise for his best friend forever. At least 60 years. Only it is the inventor who is surprised.
And then something happens to Grandma.
If you have ever read a Konrath the Elder book, especially any with Harry McGlade in it, and gone on to read another will be pleased the Konrath the Younger is developing his own writing chops.
Thank goodness it isn't a graphic novel. I would have missed a delightful story.
Even if you believe, as I did, you simply cannot read another zombie book, let this be your last. It is worth it.
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CancelReport - 5 out of 5 stars
Not your typical horror book!
Reviewed in the United States on May 29, 2020This book is full of humor (some gross) and zombies. It's been quite awhile since I've enjoyed a story as much as this one! Read carefully so you don't miss any of the innuendo or the outright groaners!
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CancelReport - 4 out of 5 stars
Grandma is a gem!
Reviewed in the United States on August 10, 2020I am so happy that this grandma was not my grandma. The book is fast moving ,gory and very zombie. Characters are characters . I would have given it a five star but is reserved for Origins another great book..
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CancelReport - 5 out of 5 stars
Hysterical, fun read!
Reviewed in the United States on February 23, 2019Geriatric zombies, a man who calls himself Einstein who invents useless (and usually dangerous) items, such as a Boomerang Hammer (for hammering around corners, of course!), and two brothers, the younger of which is smarter than the rest of the characters...put all this together and you have a combo of The Walking Dead meets the Big Bang Theory. Fun read for all ages, and I hope there is a sequel, or a movie of this!
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CancelReport - 3 out of 5 stars
Creepy and Funny
Reviewed in the United States on April 1, 2019This was about zombies and the two boys, Randall and Josh that were fighting for their lives while everyone was trying to eat them. I liked Einstein, a funny old geezer that thought he was a genius. This was gory and also funny. I thought the authors did a great job on this book.
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Top reviews from other countries
Misfit Malice4 out of 5 starsGood
Reviewed in Canada on December 25, 2020Hey! That was a fun story. I'm happy I wasn't convinced by some of the bad reviews.
There's even one who complained about the zombies speaking... That he never saw that... Common! Haven't you heard about Return of the Living Dead!?
Some complained about the humour, too. Have you heard about absurd and second degree...? You really shouldn't post bad review when you don't know what you're talking about.
Artists works really hard to provide you with entertainment. You should be grateful. I NEVER review a book under 4 stars, and when I do a critique, it's always constructive. Or I specify if it's not my usual type of story. When I don't like the book, I just close it.
Complaining about books that you paid peanuts, really!? That's kind of cheap.
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T.Russel5 out of 5 starsfunny, charming
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on February 8, 2017I found it horrfying, funny, charming, sadly however I did finish it in a weekend only because I just couldn't put it down, but since reading it I have avoided my grandmother, maybe I should give her a ring...
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Joseph Plouffe2 out of 5 starsTwo Stars
Reviewed in Canada on May 28, 2017It was well written, however, it's the first time I've ever heard of talking zombies in any book or tv. I know it's fiction but really, talking zombies.
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Aron A.2 out of 5 starsA boring read
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on May 23, 2017This book unfortunately is really bad. It sounded like a good premise but it has failed to deliver. The plot never seems to get going and the fact it's written by several people's perspectives really let's it down, it just doesn't feel natural for the reader.
It's not all bad though, as I said it showed real potential and in places it really meets that potential in places.
I wouldn't recommend this book to anyone, it's a boring read to be frank. I only gave it two stars because it had sections where it showed promise.
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